Im not sure to what degree this might anger people, but I was having a contemplative conversation with my (admittedly very Latino) family&friends group and we sort of arrived at the conclusion that we couldnât buy into the whole âMolly Weasley is an amazing cookâ idea on the simple grounds that none of us had ever eaten well at a Britâs table ever. Iâm sorry, but are you trying to convince (coerce, really) me that the white (REDHEADED at that) British woman is meant to be making all these sumptuous ambrosial meals? Am I meant to suspend my sense of realism THAT MUCH? Iâm not sure I can. Flying cars? Sure. Broom flying sports? Naturally. Wands and magic and runes and giant snakes? Most assuredly. A white British (did I mention redheaded?) woman making food that tastes anything other than bland? Inconceivable. Youâre trying the foundations of my sense of reality. Nothing and nobody could convince me that Molly Weasley cooks with anything other than salt, MAYBE pepper, and I say maybe because we all know how that particular hue of individuals handles anything remotely associated to spice. If I were to transmitigate into the Wizarding World and directly into Molly Weasleyâs kitchen, I would not be surprised in the least to find a âspice cabinetâ rather filled with mugs. No paprika, chili powder, no curry, no cardamom, no amchoor, no cumin, or oregano, or turmeric, or cayenne pepper, or saffron. Hell, Iâd cum in my pants if I got a glimpse of a whole bell pepper before whatever authorities came and arrested me for being an illegal allienesse (another distinctly white British thing). I may be wrong, though, itâs been known to happen on occasion, usually hailed by a blood moon thatâs laid curse upon my ancestry. If I am, of course I invite whatever Brit happens upon this thread to educate me, though I canât promise Iâll be cooperative because Iâve spoken to many of the such that have tried to convince (indoctrinate) me that beans do, in fact, belong on toast when, in fact, they belong now where near the vicinity. I am, however, a bean snob and find even the Italian concept of beans on pasta less than desirable. Though one cannot blame the Italians for choosing to put every fucking thing on pasta for the sole purpose of not having to occupy a pan with rice, lest they give into the oriental practices they continue to maintain they never once came upon during the consolidation of the idea for pasta. In any case, thatâs my position. I do realize this is slightly higher a word count that either you or I originally intended for so Iâll invite you to raise your complaints with my ADHD medication for only lasting four hours.
Best,
Someone with a spice tolerance (?).
