[clickbeetle]

shoutout to whoever stole my amazon package containing nothing but a single pair of shoelaces.

[clickbeetle]

[byjove]

countries will be like “nooooo our birth rate is falling exponentially and it’s effecting our economy” and immigrants will be like “hey can you let us in so we can boost your economy and fill your empty jobs and raise our children here” and inevitably the country is like “the only thing worse than a large scale collapse of our population is letting foreigners live here”

[benepla-deactivated20180521]

if i didnt know who these characters were i’d say its a french indie gay romantic drama that is playing a little too heavily with color symbolism

[wellwaterhysteria]

i think about this post like. once a week. and i mean that.

[maemaybe]

I don't know who my intended audience is here, so whoever needs to hear this, I am begging you to learn to participate in conversations that are about things you aren't interested in.

Part of socializing and having friends is being a good listener even when you don't actually give a shit about the subject.

Your are hurting other people's feelings when you bluntly respond with "Anyway..." and then change the topic.

It can not always be about your preferred topic.

You are being rude. Yes, even if you are neurodivergent. You can be both autistic and rude.

[thememedaddy]

[coughdropsandsoftspots]

While making dinner tonight, I very very fleetingly, but very seriously and legitimately thought “I should watch Goncharov tonight”

And then I Remembered.

[sunglassesbot]

That it's no longer on poob?

[hornytransgirljenni]

[niktheniknik]

This is incomprehensible outside of tumblr, i love a well maintained closed ecosystem

[fidget-sinner]

En Anglais, on ne dit pas “quatre vingt dix neuf”, on dit “ninety nine” qu'on pourrait traduire comme “Hurr durr, regardez mois, j'ai un système de numérotation fonctionnel” et je crois que c'est magnifique.

[pmpkn]

Gameboy peripheral PediSedate was designed for dentists and dosed kids with nitrous oxide as they played games.

[defective-replicant-deactivated]

Time to enter the ＧＡＭＥＲ ＺＯＮＥ

[theindefinitejames]

Camera, printer, sewing machine, now a fucking anaesthetic adminstrator…was there anything the Game Boy didn’t have an accessory for?

[fakegeekguy]

Do you know about the fish finding sonar?

[britnxyspears]

gameboy sprinted so smart phones could lag and be ugly

[latinotiktok]

[escarabangel]

Translation: "Chancho! I'm leaving now dude, i'm leaving to go work now dude."

"If someone breaks in dude, you beat the ever-loving shit out of them real hard dude, you beat the shit out of them, Chancho, you hear me?"

"You just beat the shit out of anyone who breaks in!"

translation notes:

The dogs name is 'Chancho', a slang word for a pig. Basically, its like the dog is named 'piglet' 🥺

[aspec-woomy]

I fucking can't with his little face

[littleguysdaily]

[senatortedcruz]

I hate Elon musk so fucking much

[senatortedcruz]

Exactly!!!!!

[maryfitzroy]

as joyce carol oates once said, “the poorest persons on twitter may have access to more beauty & meaning in life than the ‘most wealthy person in the world.’”

[lilyblisslys]

me with the. When she. When her. When the she her me

[mollyjames]

[woodwool]

🤗 i dont like this emoji. this is not a hug to me. this is someone doing condescending jazz hands in my general direction when i am in need of affection. not comforting.

🫂 i love this emoji. this is a hug. we are hugging and its nice. and as a special bonus they appear to be my old friends from the msn messenger logo? very comforting.

[energyprison]

yeah man open it up in tf2 for me

[rhulksdiscordkitten]

HELLO ?

[rhulksdiscordkitten]

Help I got the Temu labiaplasty and now my pussy is on backwards

[mothermara]

remember to bury the dead with a phone, everyone. these days the ferry terminal at the river styx wants you to download a fucking app

[justcatposts]

Little girl teaching her cats how to draw a flower 

(via)

[hottiewitabloggie]

they’re? just? sitting there ???

[ladycavalier]

it makes it 100% better that i can’t understand her, i feel like i’m hearing what cats hear

[socialistexan]

[crtter]

Heh, she’s speaking Portuguese! Here’s what she’s saying:

*baby voice* “… and if you have any questions, just ask me! And now… yeah. And now you draw the roots. You draw them all twisted up! Got it? A flower? Now draw it. Did you get it, Luis Roberto? Did you get it, Jurandir? Look. Did you get it? That’s how you draw a flower.”

Luis Roberto and Jurandir are people names (Jurandir is especially a name associated with older men) so it’s extra funny that the cats are named that, heh.

[hayleywilliamsfan84]

i keep laughing at the way that eridian culture in the movie and eridian culture in the book are not contradictory at all, if you accept that movie rocky is just a total FREAK

grace: boy i sure can't wait to meet other eridians haha! rocky, putting on a shirt for the first time in four years: rocky has something to tell grace but does grace promise not to be mad, question?

[specialagentartemis]

Consider also the opposite:

Grace: Hey, uh, Rocky…

Rocky: You have a question, Grace my best friend Grace?

Grace: yeah. um. Why does everyone else wear clothes and you. Don’t.

Rocky: oh. That’s because they’re mostly from 🎵🎵🎵 and people are weird about clothes there.

Grace: what

Rocky: in 🎵🎵🎵 they think it’s wrong to have your carapace uncovered in public. Which is stupid. It’s a CARAPACE who cares if your carapace is out. We all have one. My country understands this. I can’t help it if the space program was primarily organized by the 🎵🎵🎵 government because they’re the ones with power and resources so everyone who works at the space elevator thinks they need to wear clothes even when they don’t actually have to.

Grace: Rocky are you a nudist

Rocky: don’t know word. I’m 🎶🎵🎶 and also the Savior of Erid so the 🎵🎵🎵 guys can’t tell me I have to wear a shirt anymore. SUCK IT

(Meanwhile a significant chunk of Erid is going NOOOO THE GUY FROM THE NUDIST COUNTRY WAS THE ONE TO MAKE FIRST CONTACT??? While Rocky is like #FreeTheNipple and no one’s allowed to argue because he’s Savior of Erid)