it's the best game you can name 🍆💦👅
the reviews are in! thanks for watching 🥰🫡😈😜
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d e v o n

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The Stonewall Inn

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@prettysophist
it's the best game you can name 🍆💦👅
the reviews are in! thanks for watching 🥰🫡😈😜
okay but Shane takes a hit late in the game and doesn't return so in the post-game presser somebody (they're new, they don't know any better, they will never make this mistake again) asks Ilya "how's Hollander's head" and Ilya experiences every emotion at once as he wrestles with the lingering terror of seeing the love of his life take five seconds too long to get up (he's fine) and also the sheer delight at being offered this perfect, once-in-a-lifetime opportunity on a silver platter
One of the best letters I’ve ever seen just popped up on my Facebook memories. Still makes me laugh.
As today is the 50th anniversary of the moon landing, it’s a great time to revisit Dinah from Devon’s memory of this historic event. And yes, still makes me laugh.
Today is the 54th anniversary of the moon landing, but Dinah’s diary entry is still absolutely magnificent.
57th anniversary of the moon landing and the best diary entry in the history of diary entries. Sit down Samuel Pepys, it’s over. UGH.
im in the bathroom listening to the following conversation between my roommate and my cat in the hallway outside trying to stifle my laughter.
roommate: is there a problem?
cat: RAH!
roommate: oh no, is the door shut? did charlie lock you out of the bathroom?
cat: mweh...
roommate: well you see, i could fix that problem for you—
cat: MYEH!
roommate: —but due to social rules that you probably couldn't understand even if i explained them,
cat: gWAAH... mow..
roommate: yeah, dude, i hear you, but it's not gonna happen.
cat: MRRRR..!
roommate: i know i have opposable thumbs, but my hands are tied, thumbs and all. i'm sorry, i wish it didn't have to be this way.
[sound of roommate's door closing, followed by desperate scrabbling claws on the bathroom door]
You wouldn’t think that flamingoes are extremophiles just from looking at them. It’s like somebody tried to build the vertebrate equivalent of that fungus that lives inside nuclear reactors, and ended up with a gangly pink dinosaur with a spoon for a face.
For everyone in the comments asking how flamingos are extremophiles:
Flamingos can survive in low oxygen, high altitude, high temperatures, low temperatures, high alkaline, they can and will drink boiling water and they can be completely frozen at night and still get up the next morning
Don’t fuck with flamingos
….. Didn’t know most of that
Huh… so that’s why zoos don’t put them somewhere warm during winter.
Oh yeah, this leaves out what I *did* know about them–they can also survive hypersalinity. That is, water so salty it kills practically everything else–water so salty it burns your skin.
American flamingos just drink that shit
(animal death) this is a real undoctored photograph (*though the body was stood up for the shot) of a dead flamingo on the surface of lake natron, a lake so salty and so alkaline that it’s naturally carbonated like soda and would eat through your stomach lining if you drank from it.
When this photo went viral years ago, most people assumed this poor flamingo must have been killed by the lake.
It is actually the lake where 75% of its global population are hatched. This is a photo from the same lake:
Some species of flamingo actually subsist almost entirely on a diet of bacteria! In other words, there is a species of dinosaur that eats only bacteria and lives in lakes so toxic they would kill almost anything else—and it is best known to the average person as a kitschy lawn decoration.
Are you sure we should be paying attention to these guys?
first artfight piece of the month, for meezy
"focaccia, serves 4" yes all 4 me
"tiramisu, serves 2" yes all 2 myself
Pizza, serves 8, yes I 8 it all.
stop calling it a girl dinner and call it by its formal name: Fend For Yourself dinner in an ingredients household
after you’ve been through like a string of fandoms and you’ve decided your favourite character/s for each one, there will come a day when you will list all your faves from each fandom side by side and look at them carefully and realise
you have a type
often you will see things online where you just have to be like "what a strange thing to say" or "i don't think that's true :)" to yourself and try to move on or you will lose your mind
"these researchers published a paper on something that literally any of us could have told you 🙄" ok well my supervisors wont let me write something in my thesis unless I can back it up with a citation so maybe it's a good thing that they're amplifying your voice to the scientific community in a way that prevents people from writing off your experiences as annecdotal evidence
they did the research in the first place because they believed you and wanted to tell people about it. they are not our enemies.
people always go "Instead of spending all that time on a study they could have just listened to us when we said these thing happen"
they did listen, that's how studies work, they asked people about their experiences and put all the data together in a nice package that can be cited
cutie pie why did you unarchive this post I’m not complaining in fact I’m delighted
used to think it terribly silly (and kinda funny) when fantasy or sci-fi stories would have people refer to major recent historical events as The Flood or The Incident or The Revolution, and im sure historians fucking hate that because it's not helpful or descriptive, but we sure do be calling it The Pandemic
Also the new linguistic quirk of just saying “it was 2020” as like. The full end of a story. You say “it was 2020” and everyone knows what you mean.
“I was going to get my masters degree but then it was 2020, so yeah”
“I was cast in a play and then it was 2020”
“my boyfriend proposed but then it was 2020”
“they touch each other twelve fucking times in one conversation” – kenneth choi (x.)
Fouling in the MLH takes a steep decline the first year Shane & Ilya play together on the Centaurs, and they’re a bit confused why all their regular season games have been relatively un-physical. Then in one game against Toronto, some idiot (probably Dallas Kent) crosschecks Luca, and the Centaurs activate the Hollanov Power Play Special they’ve been training for all season and Toronto is swiftly, instantly, and absolutely fucked. Suddenly it becomes very clear why every team in the league is on their best behavior against Ottawa: because against Shane and Ilya’s power play, a foul will almost always cost you a fucking goal. That’s how insane their power play percentage is, and all the other teams can do is never give them a reason to be on the ice together. (Personally, the other Centaurs love this and go out of their way to draw fouls, just to see the immediate horror on the other team’s faces)
kink: deleting someone’s pointless comment by reblogging the post from the same person they did
I mean, that’s censorship but okay.
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