Jan 26
Justice League of America core members forming a heart! Yay! i had a lot of fun making this print, and I hope to debut and sell it soon! <3
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Justice League of America core members forming a heart! Yay! i had a lot of fun making this print, and I hope to debut and sell it soon! <3
Anon asked about The JLA discussing their favourite Bats, not including Bruce, sort of inspired by the Rogues rating the Robins.
Dinah: It's OK, they can't hear us. Tell us? Who is your favourite Bat Kid?
Clark, smiling a little too hard: I can't choose.
Diana: You're sweating.
Clark, gritting his teeth: I love them all.
Diana: Jason is my favourite.
Barry: That's weak sauce, he's your favourite only because your his favourite.
Diana: He's my favourite because he's interesting to talk to and respectful.
Barry: I like Tim. He really gets the science side and he likes to spend time at the lab.
Oliver: Sorry, best Robin is Dick. He was the OG.
Hal: But that's such a basic answer.
Arthur: I like Damian. He is environmentally conscious, he knows the etiquette to be in Atlantis, he's very respectful-
Dinah: He stole an octopus
Arthur: he what now
Dinah: I like Steph. She's hilarious.
J'onn: It has to be Cass for me. She never gets loud or uses the microwave for experiments. Her plans are never over the top.
Zatanna: Yes, good choice. She's mine too.
Billy: I like Duke. I think his whole glowing power is like super cool and he never interrupts me when I'm-
Clark: Fine! It's Jason!
Hal:
Barry:
Oliver: The fuck? Not Dick?
Clark: I love him, I do! But Jason... He's interested in my job, he asks about my work, he-
Dick, kicking down the door: I LOVED YOU UNCLE CLARK
jusice leag
more “had to be held back by multiple people to avoid a fight” in the JL except it’s a mess of powerscaling and awkwardness so when they do lose it, J’onn is holding Hal back by thinking really hard about yellow, Batman took Superman down to the floor one time and Superman let him because he was terrified of accidentally ripping Batman’s arm off, 4 separate League members tried to hold Diana back once from decking an asshole planetary ambassador and it only worked because Aquaman wedged his trident around her chest and it reacted strangely with her lasso. the speedsters just hold each others’ pinkies. no one is brave enough to try and hold Batman back except Superman and that always ends with him flying Batman somewhere high up so he can’t wiggle out and hurt himself. Etc etc
I adore Garth
DC Pride 2026
Bruce: The next agenda item—
(His phone buzzes.)
Bruce: ...
(He silences it.)
Diana: Everything alright?
Bruce: Yes.
Hal: You're lying.
Bruce: I am.
Barry: Who's calling Batman during a Justice League meeting?
Bruce: It's nothing.
(The phone immediately starts ringing again.)
Bruce: ...
Clark: You should probably answer it.
Bruce: They'll stop.
(The phone stops ringing.)
Bruce: See?
(It starts ringing a third time.)
Bruce: ...
Arthur: That sounds urgent.
Bruce: It isn't.
J'onn: Batman.
Bruce: J'onn.
J'onn: Your heartbeat indicates resignation, not concern.
Bruce: Correct.
Hal: Oh, now I really want to know who's calling.
(The phone rings a fourth time.)
Bruce: Excuse me.
(He answers.)
Bruce: What.
Seven voices at once: BRUCE!!
Bruce: Why are you yelling?
Dick: JASON STARTED A FIRE!
Jason: I DID NOT!
Steph: HE ABSOLUTELY DID!
Jason: IT'S BARELY A FIRE!
Tim: THAT IS NOT HOW FIRES WORK!
Damian: Todd has committed arson.
Jason: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!
Cass: Big fire.
Duke: Like... really big fire.
Bruce: ...
Bruce: Define "big."
Jason: That's subjective.
Bruce: Jason.
Jason: Bigger than a toaster.
Tim: It's in the kitchen.
Bruce: Jason.
Jason: The old kitchen.
Bruce: ...
Bruce: What happened to the kitchen?
Jason: Depends who you ask.
Steph: IT EXPLODED.
Jason: "Exploded" is a strong word.
Tim: THE OVEN IS IN THE POOL.
Arthur: ...How?
Bruce: I don't know, Arthur.
Dick: Bruce, don't be mad.
Bruce: Richard.
Dick: Jason—
Jason: Don't throw me under the bus!
Dick: You drove the bus into the house!
Bruce: Stop.
Everyone: ...
Bruce: One person speaks.
Everyone: ...
Bruce: Now.
Everyone: ...
Bruce: Fine. Damian.
Damian: Todd attempted to prepare garlic bread.
Bruce: ...
Bruce: Jason.
Jason: In my defense—
Bruce: No.
Jason: Fair.
Damian: He neglected to remove the packaging.
Jason: I forgot.
Steph: IT WAS PLASTIC.
Jason: I KNOW THAT NOW.
Tim: Then he panicked.
Duke: Then Dick panicked because Jason panicked.
Dick: Jason was yelling "IT'S FINE!"
Jason: It WAS fine.
Cass: Wasn't.
Tim: Then Steph grabbed the fire extinguisher.
Steph: Like a responsible adult.
Tim: She sprayed Jason.
Steph: He was closest.
Jason: I WAS NOT THE FIRE!
Steph: You were emotionally the fire.
Clark: *snorts*
Bruce: Clark.
Clark: Sorry.
Hal: Don't apologize. This is incredible.
Barry: Wait, is that everyone?
Bruce: Unfortunately.
Dick: Hi, League!
Steph: Is this on speaker?!
Bruce: No.
Hal: It is now.
(Hal taps the speaker button before Bruce can stop him.)
Bruce: Hal.
Hal: You're welcome, Spooky.
Dick: Hi, Hal!
Hal: Hi, Dick!
Barry: Hey, is Wally there?
Dick: Yeah, he's helping Alfred.
Barry: Can I say hi?
Bruce: Barry—
Dick: WALLY! YOUR UNCLE IS ON THE PHONE!
Wally, somewhere in the distance: TELL HIM I'M BUSY TRYING TO SAVE JASON FROM ALFRED!
Jason: SAVE ME!
Alfred, faintly: You are not escaping, Master Jason.
Jason: BRUCE, HELP.
Bruce: No.
Clark: That's fair.
Jason: YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE MY FATHER.
Bruce: I am.
Jason: ACT LIKE IT.
Bruce: I am.
Jason: THIS ISN'T SUPPORTIVE.
Bruce: Neither was the kitchen.
Barry: I'm crying.
Hal: Bruce has seven children and somehow none of them know how to cook.
Tim: Excuse me.
Hal: You know how?
Tim: No.
Hal: Thought so.
Damian: Pennyworth forbids us from entering the kitchen unattended.
Arthur: That's... concerning.
Steph: We have color-coded privilege levels.
Diana: Color-coded?
Cass: Green. Can cook.
Duke: Yellow. Can make sandwiches.
Dick: Orange. Supervised cooking.
Tim: Red. Absolutely not.
Barry: Which one is Jason?
Everyone on the phone: BLACK.
Jason: RUDE.
Steph: It literally says "If Jason enters the kitchen, notify Alfred immediately."
Hal: There's a sign?
Dick: Laminated.
Clark: Bruce..?
Bruce: I didn't make the sign.
Alfred, louder now: I did.
League: ...
Alfred: It has significantly reduced insurance claims.
Arthur: Insurance claims?!
Tim: You'd be amazed.
Jason: ONE TIME.
Cass: Nine.
Jason: Details.
Hal: This is the funniest thing I've ever heard.
Bruce: I fail to see the humor.
Clark: I don't.
Bruce: Of course you don't.
Clark: They're adorable.
Bruce: They are committing property damage.
Clark: Together.
Bruce: Clark.
Clark: Listen to them. They're calling you because they trust you.
Bruce: They're calling me because the oven is in the pool.
Clark: Still counts.
Barry: Aww.
Hal: Oh my God.
Arthur: He's smiling.
Diana: He absolutely is.
Clark: I'm not.
J'onn: You are.
Clark: Fine. Maybe a little.
Hal: Superman thinks Batman's disaster children are cute.
Barry: Write that down.
Clark: They are cute.
Bruce: They are twenty-five percent cute and seventy-five percent expensive.
Dick: We heard that!
Bruce: Good.
Steph: Rude!
Jason: I think we're at least forty percent cute.
Damian: I refuse to be categorized with these barbarians.
Cass: Cute.
Damian: ...
Damian: Acceptable.
Clark: See?
Bruce: Don't encourage them.
Clark: I can't help it.
Hal: Dude, you're whipped.
Clark: Am not.
Barry: You absolutely are.
Clark: Bruce is a great dad.
Hal: Bruce's children just called him because one of them accidentally launched an oven into a swimming pool.
Clark: Exactly.
Barry: Explain.
Clark: They knew he'd know what to do.
Bruce: I do know what to do.
Dick: Really?
Bruce: Yes.
Dick: Great, what do we do?
Bruce: Put Alfred on the phone.
(A brief shuffle.)
Alfred: Good afternoon, sir.
Bruce: Is everyone alive?
Alfred: Miraculously.
Bruce: Is the Manor still standing?
Alfred: Mostly.
Bruce: Is anyone seriously injured?
Alfred: Master Jason's pride has suffered catastrophic damage.
Jason: ALFRED!
Alfred: Other than that, no.
Bruce: Excellent. Handle it however you see fit.
Jason: WAIT, NO—
Bruce: I'll be home in an hour.
Alfred: Very good, sir.
(The call disconnects.)
The meeting room is completely silent.
Hal: I have one question.
Bruce: No.
Hal: How does this happen every week?
Bruce: Practice.
Barry: I want to come over sometime.
Bruce: No.
Clark: Can I?
Bruce: You already do.
Clark: True.
Hal: Seriously, Supes, you find that endearing?
Clark: Absolutely.
Barry: They called Bats like kids calling their dad because they broke something.
Clark: Exactly.
Arthur: They are all highly trained vigilantes.
Clark: Who still call B when they accidentally destroy the kitchen.
Diana: It is rather sweet.
Bruce: It is not sweet.
Clark: Bruce.
Bruce: Clark.
Clark: You answered on the fourth call.
Bruce: Because they only call that many times if it's important.
Hal: Or if Jason's cooking.
Bruce: Those are the same thing.
Clark: You didn't even ask if they were telling the truth.
Bruce: Because I already knew exactly who did it.
Barry: Without evidence?
Bruce: Jason said "in my defense" before I asked a single question.
Hal: Fair.
Clark, smiling at Bruce: You're a really good dad.
Bruce: ...
Hal: THERE'S THE SMILE.
Bruce: There is no smile.
Barry: Supes broke Batman.
Clark: I didn't break him.
Bruce, very quietly: We still need a new oven.
Clark: I'll buy you one.
Bruce: I know.
Hal: Oh, that's disgustingly domestic.
Barry: They're impossible.
Diana: They really are.
J'onn: It is, however, objectively adorable.
Bruce: The meeting is over.
Hal: We still have four agenda items.
Bruce: Not anymore.