yay water
[ID: Two lorikeet birds bouncing around a water bowl being filled. /END ID]
time to drink water woo hoo yay
#phm#ryland grace#rocky the eridian#project hail mary spoilers




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yay water
[ID: Two lorikeet birds bouncing around a water bowl being filled. /END ID]
time to drink water woo hoo yay
AUDHD is Horrific
and People Don’t Talk About It Enough
Sometimes I wish people understood what it actually feels like to live with AUDHD the combination of Autism and ADHD. It’s not quirky, it’s not “cute,” and it’s definitely not just being distracted or socially awkward. It’s a daily battle inside your own mind, and most of the world never sees the internal exhaustion behind it.
Living with AUDHD means having a brain that can’t decide whether it wants absolute structure or total chaos. One moment you’re overstimulated to the point of shutting down, and the next moment you’re stuck in a spiral of hyperactivity and racing thoughts. You crave routine but get bored of it. You want to focus but your brain refuses to cooperate. You want calm, but everything feels too loud, too bright, too fast.
People see the outside the forgetfulness, the fidgeting, the sensitivity, the intense interests and they assume it’s manageable. But they don’t see the burnout that hits without warning. They don’t feel the sensory overload that makes small things feel unbearable. They don’t experience the guilt of wanting to do things but being unable to start, or the frustration of trying your absolute best while still being labeled “lazy,” “dramatic,” or “unmotivated.”
And the worst part is the loneliness. Because AUDHD often makes you feel “too much” for everyone. Too sensitive, too emotional, too intense, too overwhelmed. So you learn to mask. You pretend you’re fine. You try to act “normal,” even when your brain is screaming.
But here’s the truth: AUDHD is not a character flaw. It’s not a choice. It’s a reality that deserves understanding, compassion, and awareness. People who live with it are fighting battles every single day and doing it quietly.
If you know someone with AUDHD, be kind. Be patient. Believe them. Support matters more than you realize.
It's her!! 💖 And yes, that is my most confusingly written speech balloon ever, I also glazed over while rereading it.
My ADHD: I cannot clean it feels like putting my hand on a hot stove
My autism: Things aren't in order I feel like I'm going to explode I have to clean there has to be order
My ADHD: I feel like going to explode because I physically cannot clean my brain won't let me
Me: Guess we just feel horrible then
As cute as this au was originally planned to be i do want to acknowledge the hurdle ill have to go through writing caines character, such as his lack of empathy
A lot of showtime fics, or comics ive seen always make Caine a more receptive and empathetic character by the beginning of the story in order to make the bond between pomni and caine more smooth. And while i personally like it, i also want to look at the more difficult aspects of their relationship, or frankly what it would be like to befriend caine. Like his adventures and inability to listen to the cast is one thing, but there’s also the fact he is not at all phased by abstractions.
That’s a key aspect to his character and how hell be able to bond with other characters. I mean imagine dating a dude and knowing he doesnt react at all to funerals of long time friends. It’s GONNA be something thats gonna be hard to accept at first, and frankly im still thinking about how pomni could try to get Caine to better himself. Like to me this au is gonna feel less like “i can fix him” but moreover “i can try to understand him”. Because caine ISNT Jax, its not like hes fighting against the idea of connecting with pomni its the regular methods of doing so dont work with him
So pomni by default IS gonna hit some roadblocks while trying to befriend him, and it might hurt along the way for the both of them
This is Also not even including the fact that he’s hiding that everyone has the ability to conjure, AND the Abel adventure. So like it’s GONNA be complicated, like i wont lie caine might suck a lot here. But hes also gonna be really awesome here too maybe.
Idk im looking more and more into different discussion of people who have family members/ loved ones who lack empathy and there IS a lot of struggle in their stories. So i dont want to hide that from them either. I myself have felt both pomnis and caines experience in this au so its also might be from the heart(lol) as well
Idk theyre just so fucking compelling to me, i wish they had more interaction in canon, fluffy or not
man I wish people understood how much it sucks ass to be neurodivergent and trying to find the middle ground where people like/tolerate you. like, I'm either "boring" (trying to wait my turn in conversations, holding space for other people, taking a back seat to let others get some spotlight) or "too much" (too loud/talking too much, getting excited to share, trying to participate in group conversations/activities). No one really talks about how much of being neurodivergent is just sort of trying to make yourself palatable.
I feel like so much of my life has been spent trying to find this effortless sort of middle ground everyone else seems to automatically already know, and I'm always swinging too far one way or the other. I'm lucky to have neurodivergent friends who grok me, but goddamn I wish that I could just like, exist without the constant background script in my brain that's like "you're being too loud. You're not talking enough. you're being self-centered. you're being boring. you're wrong, you're wrong, you're wrong." I feel like I'm back in high school trying to make friends but stuck as the eternal "weird kid"
it's just... lonely and sucks bad.
Are you a 'I need absolute silence, or I cannot do anything,' or a 'if I don't have music playing I will literally die' kind of Neurodivergent?
The Discord Server is full of both kinds.
Reddit - Webtoons - Tapas - Bluesky
you know what. people are allowed to say they suffer from autism.
autistic people saying they are disabled by it and suffering is not an argument for eugenics. it's not an argument at all. it's a signal that someone needs support. they may have that support, they may not, or maybe they have some support but not enough.
you can talk about how "autism moms" villify autism without punching down on disabled autistics. you can talk about how they say their children 'suffer' from autism without shutting out the fact autistic traits can lead to distressing & debilitating experiences. we know autism is a neurodivergency, not a personality quirk. autism is a difference in neurological functioning. it's not a stretch to say that means it can be disabling.
high and medium support needs autistics matter. level 2 and 3 autistics matter. our suffering does deserve to be heard, from us directly, or chosen advocates. and it deserves to be addressed - not dismissed. you don't have to identify as disabled from autism. but what you're not allowed to get away with is telling other autistic people that they're not disabled or suffering when they are.
ableism just makes the distress from the disability worse. it doesn't cause the disability, and the distress is morally neutral. that's a fucking human emotion. toxic positivity isn't advocacy. it's harm. stop it.
PS: i am self-diagnosed AuDHD & medium support needs. i am disabled by autism & suffer for it. i also want to grow to love my autistic self. these are not mutually exclusive <3