#autistic borderline

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

yay water

[ID: Two lorikeet birds bouncing around a water bowl being filled. /END ID]

time to drink water woo hoo yay

[ontheoutside-lookingin]

When people say “just be yourself” but the only you you’ve ever know is a performative calculation based on how you’ll be perceived

[theasylumwheretheyraisedme]

Trying to be taken seriously as a fem and/or afab autistic is kind of like relentlessly being told to go fuck yourself every day but then also everyone is demanding to know why you are so reserved and cold and isolated all the time? why don’t you get out more?? and if you answer honestly they will look at you with so much shock and horror like a ten year old in 2006 witnessing the true graphic extent of the pre-code internet for the first time

[everythingls-romantic]

Living hits different when you remember that a sink full of dirty dishes means you ate and piles of dirty laundry means you had clothes to wear and having a messy home means you have a home

[sleeplessv0id]

I have no hope of a normal way to go about making friends. I have been corrupted, the ultimate power of Autism unleashed.

like, everything I do that normally my friends wouldn't bat an eye at, nothing. The jokes don't land, and when they do, the laughter is AT me, not with me.

Only then, once I'm quiet, speak only when spoken to, once I've boxed myself up, will they give me the time of day.

After that? I have to prove myself "enough" CONSTANTLY in whatever way so they won't leave me. An old dog performing tricks to keep from being replaced with a newer, cuter puppy.

I'm more confident now, yes, but I can still see just as well as I did before the blank stares before meeting the others' eye, how they look at me, I can hear it in their giggling at what is supposed to be a joke but is really at me.

[autismcultureis]

autism culture is being treated so badly in your childhood because the world wasn’t made for high masking neurodivergents who may not even realize that it may not be something wrong with them personally that you develop bpd and they work in tandem against you

.

[maevianum]

Why can’t I just fit into this fucking world

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

Friendly reminder that you can talk to your brain like a beloved innocent little kid and it works probably better than you’d expect

“Wow this is pretty rough huh…let’s think of some good things instead! What are some things we’re looking forward to?”

“I have an idea, lets pretend we’re in slow-motion, even our breathing and blinking is slooowwww”

“Quick I need your help it’s really super important! Tell me every single [color/animal/etc] you can possibly think of”

“Hey buddy, do you maybe want your favorite snack? I bet you’re pretty tired huh…how about we have a little nap/go to bed early tonight”

Doesn’t always have to be for handling negative stuff either in fact doing it in neutral-positive situations will help you remember it’s even an option in times of distress. And in general it’s just very healing, promotes self-worth, etc.

(no specific source other than that one of my lifelong special interests has been How To Be Better In Every Way Because Everthing About Me Just Seems Wrong)