only lorem ipsum here

AELEOLUS: Call me Leo; this is a multi-fandom, multi-ship blog, but I like linguistics, cinematography, and characters who refuse to have feelings. Let me know if I can tag something for you, and the ask box is open! Icon by @viria

[ozempicofficial]

[mrhealyourgirl]

happy pride to losers who get no bitches and stack no paper

[jumpingjacktrash]

How to Tell if You're in a Raymond Chandler Story - The Toast

"You self-identify as a henchman."

You have nothing in your apartment but a yellow davenport, a small fold-out table, and fourteen bottles of Scotch.

You only carry a .32 caliber gun with a white-bone grip because you are a lady and that is a gun for ladies.

You are a blonde who is neither icy nor languid, which makes you unclassifiable.

You are always many steps ahead of the cops, whom you do not respect.

i want all four of these applied to a single character and she will be my favorite

[littlepinkbeast]

whoops my hand slipped:

My boss always tells me that a thirty-two caliber pistol is no gun for a lady, because it is no gun for anyone. I tell him that it is absolutely a gun for a lady such as myself, because it has polished white bone grips that fit my hand just so. He tells me that he was shot once with a thirty-two, and it did not even slow him down. I tell him that not everyone is lucky enough to be shot in the ear, especially not when I am doing the shooting, and that if the person who shot him had done the job properly, he would not be complaining. We have this conversation at least once a week. If I ever have to shoot my boss, I will not shoot him in the ear, because that is a part of his body he does not use and will not miss if I do shoot him there.

Today we are having this conversation in my apartment. We are at my apartment because the cops are at my boss’s apartment, and they wish very urgently to speak with him. My boss is not at his apartment, because he wishes very urgently to not speak with the cops there, or indeed any cops whatsoever. If the cops knew anything at all about my boss, they would look for him here, but the only things the cops know how to do in this town are take bribes and run protection rackets. At this they are almost as good as my boss.

I am sitting on my davenport, which is a brighter yellow than my hair, but not nearly so pretty. My boss is not sitting on the davenport. He is standing, because even my boss can be a gentleman at times, such as when a lady does not wish to share her davenport, at least if she explains this to him with small words and many gestures, some of which involve a thirty-two caliber pistol. He is also not sitting on my fold-out table, because he would break it, and also because there would be no room for the fourteen bottles of Scotch whisky. My boss is something in the line of an importer of Scotch whisky, which is a very important job in these times, now that the Volstead Act has made it very illegal to make Scotch whisky or indeed any other kind of whisky here. There were sixteen bottles when my boss arrived, but we have been putting this Scotch whisky to the use for which it was intended, namely drinking. There is no other furniture in my apartment, because only a sucker spends the night at her own apartment when she can be spending it in more interesting places, like nightclubs and dance halls and other peoples’ apartments.

As we are having this conversation, a man comes through the door with a gun. I shoot him three times, because he is a heavy for one of the rival mobs in town, and the last time I shot him, I only shot him twice and he was out of the hospital in three weeks. This time by my reckoning he will be in the hospital for at least four weeks and a half, or possibly the morgue. It is a very great nuisance to have our conversation interrupted like this, but it does at least go to show that even the rival mobs here, who are so dumb they think they can compete directly with my boss, are still smarter than the cops.

[autophage]

You make soup in a big bowl. You serve it in a smaller bowl. And then you convey it, using a spoon, to your mouth. But what is the spoon? Simply a smaller bowl still

[bibaleen]

[shutyourmoustache]

When my mother forgets a word, she is the queen of coming up with new words. Words that would take a third National Treasure movie to fully decipher. I was talking to her yesterday, and she said this: “You know the time for los jibbities is coming up. You must be so excited!” Oh, is it time for los jibbities already? I must have missed it on my calendar. Are we celebrating something? “Of course! We should all be celebrating, shouldn’t we?” OK, so los jibbities is a happy thing. It’s not like something is giving you the heebie-jeebies, which would have been my one and only guess. “Los heebie-jeebies? Now you’re making things up...and this is my show.” You’re right. The time for los jibbities is coming up. Is this a season? “Yes, the season for love. The season for pride.” OK, los jibbities. “Yeah, sound it out.” Los…jibbities. LGBTs! “Sí, mira cuz you’re gay!” “You couldn’t just say pride season? You couldn’t just… *laughs*

[party-gilmore]

HAPPY LOS JIBBITIES EVERYBODY!!!

[greatmountainfloofsquatch]

The time for Los Jibbities has arrived!

[ororium-z]

Happy Pride!

[superhell]

i just don't think 16 minutes is going to cover it

[avadaniels]

"Scrooge learns the true meaning of Bisexual Awareness Week" Make Some Noise Season 3 Episode 11

[knightofleo]

Happy Pride Mnth.

[bayesic-bitch]

Starting my speech at the Omelas city council with a child acknowledgement statement

[mevil]

[apatheticfluorescence]

some hyper famous artists like Van Gogh transcend overratedness and become underrated because they're so normalized. Like I'll look at a van Gogh and I'm like wait this really is amazing you guys don't get it

[whatagrump]

Apparently a lot of people get dialogue punctuation wrong despite having an otherwise solid grasp of grammar, possibly because they’re used to writing essays rather than prose. I don’t wanna be the asshole who complains about writing errors and then doesn’t offer to help, so here are the basics summarized as simply as I could manage on my phone (“dialogue tag” just refers to phrases like “he said,” “she whispered,” “they asked”):

“For most dialogue, use a comma after the sentence and don’t capitalize the next word after the quotation mark,” she said.

“But what if you’re using a question mark rather than a period?” they asked.

“When using a dialogue tag, you never capitalize the word after the quotation mark unless it’s a proper noun!” she snapped.

“When breaking up a single sentence with a dialogue tag,” she said, “use commas.”

“This is a single sentence,” she said. “Now, this is a second stand-alone sentence, so there’s no comma after ‘she said.’”

“There’s no dialogue tag after this sentence, so end it with a period rather than a comma.” She frowned, suddenly concerned that the entire post was as unasked for as it was sanctimonious.

[thewritinggrindstone]

And!

“If you’re breaking dialogue up with an action tag”—she waves her hands back and forth—”the dashes go outside the quotation marks.”

[holespoles]

Botanical Applique Quilt by Chinami Terai (Japan)

寺井ちなみ「緑のヴァリエ」

[taraxippos]

Did anyone ever like attempt to document and compile the variations of Barney the dinosaur murder ballads across the elementary school system in the early 2000s. Like legit it has always fascinated me as a phenomena and I would love to know if there were like traceable regional variations or what.

[taraxippos]

Looking at the tags so far I’m kind of fascinated by how much the ‘I Love You’ parodies vary in their phrasing/murder weapons but the ‘Joy to the World’ ones are nearly identical

[karvina]

here is my collection of barney murder songs as they appeared in the notes and comments of this post at about 4 pm pacific 7/25, somewhat arbitrarily color coded to show similar memes. it appears that "baseball bat and 2x4" is the mode configuration but there is so much variation that that exact phrasing only makes up a small part of the set. if i knew more about statistical modeling i would turn this into some kind of data tree that shows which phrases are most likely to follow other phrases.

[leupagus]

Hey so not to be all "what the fuck, Youths," but...what the fuck, Youths

[podcastwizard]

NO DAD, air brushing unlicensed images of spongebob smoking weed on to t-shirts and selling them at a boardwalk was YOUR DREAM. i'm going to be a PROJECT MANAGER.

[nolaplantdaddy]

I love when people ask "how did you learn this skill?" I just started, there's no secret. that's it. a vast majority of the time the only thing holding you back is your trepidation to start.

[noegrets]