Bigtrashfire

The biggest trash fire. terfs must die. hey, I made an account for just my art stuff so go check that out if you want at @bigtrashyart

[pafbar]

lousy golfer

[tikkety-tok]

It's now safe and warm with some hazelnuts

[bredforloyalty]

[hananafell]

good news: vivian ttyd IS trans bad news: it is happening again

[the-haiku-bot]

good news: vivian

ttyd IS trans bad news: it is

happening again

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[haiku-bot-human-version]

good news: vivian

ttyd IS trans but

it's still happening

When the haiku bot messes up I will be there to correct the post.

[the-haiku-bot]

When the haiku bot

messes up I will be there

to correct the post.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[cyber-corp]

this website’s easy watch. *dangles a bunch of greek gods like keys*

[cyber-corp]

i know what i’m doing dw

[cyber-corp]

Keep in mind I only know like. Two Greek gods by name. Homer is one of them, and he was good friends with Odysseus I think?

[cyber-corp]

Wait fuck Homer isn’t a god he wrote the fucking thing. Fuck

[cyber-corp]

POST CANCELLED NO ONE LOOK

[cyber-corp]

desperately google searching for “greek gods to pray to when people notice your online idiocy”

[pluto-officially]

You're failing.

[cyber-corp]

You don’t think I know that, God of Death? Can I pray to you so I can DIE ALREADY

[communist-mannyfesto]

Pluto is Roman, not Greek

[cyber-corp]

?????

[enigma-system03]

Short version is that Pluto is a later name for the god of death, which is often associated with the Roman era/Roman mythology. Hades is the earlier name.

[cyber-corp]

I set up my own house made of sticks and it has promptly fallen on me

[cyber-corp]

HE’S NOT EVEN REAL?????*

[cyber-corp]

I made this post thinking I knew what kind of fire I was playing with. Hephaestus, God of Fire, looking upon me from his fuck off tower or whatever said “Oh you think you know? Check this shit” and promptly set my post ablaze for everyone to observe

[legionoftuna]

Hephaestus doesn't have a tower, he lived in a volcano

[cyber-corp]

FINE THEN. BIG FUCK OFF VOLCANO. WHATEVER

[cyber-corp]

wrong.

[pointless-achievements]

Achievement Unlocked:

Lightning Bait

You're basically doing the post equivalent of standing out in a field during a storm with a ten-foot copper pole, you better hope Zeus is busy hiding from Hera.

[cyber-corp]

FUCK'S SAKE NOT AGAIN

[taco-bee]

I need you to name every greek God you know and what they are for plz

For science

[cyber-corp]

OKAY FINE HERE'S WHAT I'VE FOUND

HERMES: DA FUNNY ONE

ZEUS: DA LIGHTNING (NOTE: THOUGHT HE WAS NORDIC, FATHER OF THOR)

POSEIDON: DA SEA ONE

HEPHAESTUS: DA FIRE/FORGING/STEEL ONE

APHRODITE: DA HOT ONE

KRATOS: GOD OF WAR

HADES: DA HELL ONE. ROGUE LIKE

APOLLO: DA DODGEBALL/PROPHECY ONE

[boxxed-juice]

ares is the god of war, not kratos

[cyber-corp]

WHY THE FUCK DOES THE GAME CALL HIM GOD OF WAR THEN

[f1rstperson]

Eris dangling this concept in front of OP like "make the post, it'll be so funny. You know the name of some greek gods, you can do it."

[ziraseal]

op I'll give you a golden apple if you name the hottest goddess

[the-haiku-bot]

op I’ll give you a

golden apple if you name

the hottest goddess

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[tillius-the-paladin]

Daily fucking reminder that Luigi Mangione is innocent, completely and fully. He has been convicted of no crime. He has had no fair trial. He is a SUSPECT. Luigi Mangione is entirely innocent and everyone needs to stop parroting this insidious propaganda that he “committed” the crime he is only SUSPECTED of. He is not a murderer. He is not a criminal. He is an innocent man.

[cynicalclassicist]

Put this out about Luigi Mangione.

[humblegrub]

if you like lego + jumping spiders, you should vote on this user created lego product idea! if it gets 10k votes it has the chance to become a real set 🕷️🕷️🕷️

VOTE NOW!!!

[spuddragon]

Reblogging again cause they're less than 2000 signatures away! Also because I need this to exist

[humblegrub]

only about 2k left as of 3/23/25! another push!

[weonsinnombre]

[adamsmasher]

What I love about this is seeing that he's clearly a hockey skater. Now, I don't know shit about fuck when it comes to cold slippy antics, but what I notice is different between hockey skaters and nearly all other skaters is that hockey skaters essentially run on the ice. Any other skater is trying to glide, perform, or be otherwise smooth. Create a new type of mobility, but on ice. But hockey skaters? The floor is slippery but that's why they've got knives on their feet, so it's running time. Run run run run.

So this is like playing tag on ice, except the one guy you're trying to get is magically not on ice. And I think that's pretty neat.

[jackironsides]

He’s also making really good use of the stoppers on the front of his skates. You can clearly see several times that when he starts juking and running he’s not actually running with the wheels in contact with the ground – he’s tipped forward to run on the rubber stoppers, which will give him more traction on the slippery surface. He can change direction faster because none of his kinetic energy is going into countering the inertia of spinning wheels.

I don’t know if the picks on the front of ice skates are used similarly (because ice hockey is not so much of a national pastime in Australia) but I wouldn’t be surprised. But I spent a bit of time with a roller derby team, and I recognised that particular stopper run :)

[brightlotusmoon]

[honoriaw]

toe pick!

[trans-girl-bagel]

I don’t like being referred to as a boy

[elvis-official]

Woah mama I'll give anyone who misgenders you the Elvis Special (a bullet)

[trans-girl-bagel]

This account likely makes the list of “the last accounts I’d ever expect to be anywhere near my blog” but I appreciate it

[elvis-official]

Woah mama I'm one of your mutuals

[trans-girl-bagel]

WHAT

[vriskakinnieaynrand]

[r2d2communism]

[tf2heritageposts]

fandom heritage post gimmick blogs should unionize

[pokemonheritageposts]

workers of the world, unite

[sonicheritageposts]

join the local union today! we have nothing to lose but our chains!

[marioheritageposts]

[world-heritage-mc]

[aceattorneyheritageposts]

📢🎵 There is power in a (heritage posts gimmick blog) union 📢🎵

[narutoheritageposts]

hey guys whats going on over here can i hang out😁😁

[residentevilheritageposts]

Thanks for the invite @pokemonheritageposts

[mobpsychoheritageposts]

always happy to do my part 🙏

[balaclava-trismegistus]

Not saying anything nobody's said before, but the way Fallout is a foundationally anti-capitalist story that got turned into funkopop sci-fi pastiche slop for morons is painful to the point of brilliance. Makes its points about greed and power that much more salient.

[balaclava-trismegistus]

People are, years later, still writing paragraph after paragraph on this post to tell me I'm full of shit. About the game where half of everything is plastered in conspicuous branding, the plot of the first game is caused by shady corporate scheming, the guys who caused all this shit to happen are businessmen from centuries ago, and the most iconic line in the franchise comes from a speech about military expansionism for resources to fuel economic function. That speech is the first verbal statement of the series. The first point of contact period in the entire series is an advertisement, shot panning out to reveal it is displayed on a television playing a series of commercials, and that this television is in a completely destroyed urban center, yet hauntingly continues to play.

What do you think this represents? What do you think the authors of this work may have been attempting to communicate through these images? Do you think it was simple coincidence? See me after class, so I can kill you.

[thydungeongal]

A goblin and an elf have decided to defy tradition and get married. Their ceremony will be held in the magical forest in accordance with elven tradition.

[thydungeongal]

It's a beautiful ceremony. The elven bride in her finest, flowing silks, dappled by the sun. The goblin bride in a human-sized wedding dress stolen from a goodwill.

[thydungeongal]

The elven side of the aisle of course has the elvish bride's father and mother, as well as her older sisters, as well as all the forest animals who inhabit her parents' court.

The goblin side is a bunch of The Labyrinth looking freaks in their best simulacrum of what they think good folks wear to weddings. The father of the bride is wearing a really snazzy cocktail dress.

[thydungeongal]

It's a mixed tradition ceremony. The elven part of the ceremony involves the young couple being presented in front of the king of the forest, a majestic unicorn, who blesses the couple by touching them with his horn.

The goblins kidnapped a local priest to bless the couple according to their tradition.

[thydungeongal]

The ring the elven bride presents to her wife-to-be is brought in by a squirrel riding a doe. It's made of silver, inlaid with decorative golden leaves.

The goblin worst man accidentally swallowed the ring, which was purchased from a pawn shop.

[thydungeongal]

The father of the elven bride keeps looking over to the goblin side of the aisle, barely hiding his disgust. But he is resigned to it. What matters most is his daughter's happiness.

At the end of the ceremony his face sinks as the father of the goblin bride says "Welcome to the family! You can call me brother," while vigorously shaking his hand.

[thydungeongal]

The reception is, of course, held at a speakeasy according to goblin tradition. The ceiling is only five feet tall, making it very difficult for the elves.

"An elf walks into a bar,"

"Will you please stop saying that!"

[thydungeongal]

During the reception the father of the goblin bride, named Frankie the Third, decides to introduce his family to his new elven family.

"These are my older sisters, Frankie the First and Frankie the Second. No relation."

"What does that mean,"

[thydungeongal]

#the father of the elven bride is absolutely disgusted by the goblin's dad#right up until he's got some of that good goblin ale in him and then they're both singing old shanties together#'i am amazed you know this one! it must be far older than you - we sang it hundreds of years ago!'#'yeah i ate some old musty book full of songs once and i think that was in there'#'...okay!'#they're superbowl dad buddies afterward

You understand my vision

[luna-is-old]

My favorite bit is it sounds like @thydungeongal is there and they're live tweeting the wedding.

[nuclear-mech-wizard-deactivated]

I love the implication that goblins are incredibly well-read because they keep eating pure information 📚

[thydungeongal]

You should see my uncle who once ate a stack of porno mags

[knitmeapony]

He ate them for the articles.

[cipheramnesia]

But he spit out all the nasty prepositions and gerunds.

[nudityandnerdery]

"The goblin worst man accidentally swallowed the ring, which was purchased from a pawn shop." Riiiiiight. It was "purchased".

[readasaur]

This is the priest's eighth goblin wedding. (There is some contention over whether one wedding counted as it became a race to finish the vows before the groom finished giving birth and it became a christening)

He is dumped out of the burlap sack and begins "We are gathered here today..." without hesitation. Two goblin children have to be restrained from running up and climbing him because he's their favorite god-uncle. The first time he was kidnapped he was terrified and had to be prodded (literally) to say the wedding vows to the happy couple. The second time he was kidnapped, he spent the entire time protesting that this didn't count and argued with the mother-in-law about what should be said and was repeatedly cowed into submission. The third wedding he was delirious from lack of sleep and when uncle drunkenly demanded he hurry up, the priest snapped and went into "fire and brimstone" mode declaring that a sacred union of love was not to be disrespected in such a way and incorporating it into his blessing upon the union before resigning himself to death. Unfortunately for him, the goblins loved it and he immediately became the most preferred priest in the region and was dragged into the community celebrations completely against his will. He pretends to pull a ring from behind the bride's ear to make up for the missing one, and sincerely tells the couple that he knows that they will be very happy together before he crowd surfs to the exit. Wild applause erupts.

[comicgeekscomicgeek]

I love everything about this.

[cryoverkiltmilk]

I would like to know the responsibilities of the Worst Man

[thesaltofcarthage]

The Worst Man is a coveted position at all weddings ("Man" being a translation of the goblin person, of course, can be any species or gender) because it's so much fun. It's the Worst Man's job to break all the tension.

Groom is terrified he's going to lose something? Worst Man loses it first.

Bride has some nasty relatives she wants kept out of the wedding because they object to the other bride? Worst Man plays bouncer. Meaning they bounce the offending parties clear out of the county. Occasionally out of the time zone.

Caterer is fretting about the cake? Worst Man falls into it and wrecks it.

Father-in-Law is worried about Uncle getting drunk and saying something stupid? Worst Man gets drunker and draws all the attention.

Officiant gets stage fright and can't speak? Worst Man heckles them until they get angry enough to talk. (See "third wedding" above.)

Jealous friend saying rude things about the bride? Worst Man just dumps barrels of red wine on her until she shuts up and/or leaves.

After one's spouse, determining your Worst Man is pretty much the most important choice for a wedding.

[squeakitties]

[necromosss]

As the person who got their R keyboard broken and the world mocked me for being forced to use the uwu language as replacement

My condolences

[commodore-64]

put that back

[the-davest-of-uncles]

National Lampoon, October 1985

[the-lexiverse]

Texas’ HB 3399 bill will kill people if it passes. It will make hormone therapy illegal. For all ages. Period. This was never about women’s sports. It was never about bathrooms. It was never about “protecting the children”. They want us dead. If you’re a fellow trans person and you live in Texas, I strongly urge you to be ready to move somewhere safer.

[wyf-of-bathe]

Not just hormone therapy, but also

surgeries that sterilize individuals, administering certain prescription drugs that induce infertility, or removing healthy body parts

This potentially includes

They really, really do want trans people - or anyone who potentially could be trans - dead.

(Tumblr won't let me link the source, but the bill is on Texas Legislature Online .gov)

[wyf-of-bathe]

I forgot to add this: you can use Resistbot to find and write to your state or federal officials, so this is a great tool if you don't know how to go about doing that. If you're a Texas resident, a quick message to your state reps asking them to vote against HB 3399 would be very helpful right now.

Resistbot

Text RESIST to 50409 to contact your federal, state, or local elected officials; create movements; and more. Over 30,000,000 letters deliver

Remember to be polite, even if you don't like your official. I usually leave a nice note thanking their staff, too.

[prof-grace-aspen]

They also clearly want any person who can bear a child, to bear a child. This is staunchly anti-birth-control. It's horrifying.

[pissvortex]

WHITE PHARAOH ALIVE IN PITTSBURGH

[trans-girl-nausicaa]

[ishy]

SIMPLE AND CLEAN IS THE WAY THAT YOU'RE MAKING ME FEEL TONIGHT

[tsunderrated]

[isa-ah]

most cathartic part of orpheus 2025 <3

[isa-ah]

of the 5 teslas in the parade, one turned off so early we didnt even see it, one had to turn off after someone cracked its windshield, and one had to turn off after it got a window shattered. further down from us people were fully throwing garbage and beer bottles with the intention of breaking glass. only 2 of them made it to the end of the parade, having been jeered end to end.

if this was supposed to be a temperature test- because people are speculating this was a test ride for the military and tesla having a partnership, no one knows why on earth these things were in mardi gras to begin with- then they certainly got an idea of how people feel.

[isa-ah]

@woodsywizard LITERALLYYY

[vtimeisteatime]

I have been thinking about them fleeing to metairie all day. elleauxelle