NASA
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Love Begins
macklin celebrini has autism
Product Placement
styofa doing anything
tannertan36
AnasAbdin
Andulka
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Xuebing Du
Claire Keane
Keni
šŖ¼
Kaledo Art
ē„ę„ / Permanent Vacation
@theartofmadeline
No title available
d e v o n
trying on a metaphor
seen from Russia
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@gobblebook
just saw this clip and i think itd make a funny reaction image what do u think... does it have potential
THE CLASSIC
THE ORIGINAL
kids these days have NO IDEA the damage this animal did to the internet in the 2000s
it physically hurts my brain to watch this video clip and not hear the dramatic music sting from young frankenstein
Itās not a Discworld joke unless you read it, donāt parse it as a joke, and then carry on with your life for ten years until someone stops you to say something like āItās a pavlovian response because the dog ate a pavlovaā and you scream Terryās name with enough indignant rage you hope it rattles the pillars of the multiverse so wherever his soul is heāll hear it.
#i donāt think this is what pterry meant by āa manās not dead while his name is still spokenā
I absolutely think it is
I read Jingo for the first time when I was 13.
Iām 33 now, and I still discover a new joke every time I reread it.
Terry was a comedic genius
#shoutout to the one in Soul Music about the leopard that got thrown out of the circus because it couldn't hear the ringmaster#it was several months after my second or third time reading the book that I clocked it was a Deaf LeopardĀ (via @morkaischosen)
god DAMMIT
When I was informed that āVetinariā is a pun on āMediciā. That pun was so painful I couldnāt even see it.
...are you FUCKING KIDDING ME.
*starts thunderously knocking on the doors of heaven*
get out here Terry I just wanna talk
Twurpās Peerage made me throw a book (gently) at a wall.
In the UK, the book of the peerage is called Burkeās Peerage. Burke sounds like berk, which means a silly/annoying person. So Terry tookĀ ātwerpā, another word for a silly or annoying person, and replaced the e with u.Ā
The Book of Silly and Annoying People, based on the real thing with a pun on the name thrown in for good measure.
OMG I FUCKING *KNEW* VETINARI WAS A JOKE ON FUCKONG SOMETHING I JUST COULDNT GRASP IT. I THOUGHT IT WAS A REFERENCE TO WIND SOMEHOW
I am not a talented punster so I was today old when I realised about Vetinari.
guys it's fucking close to water
Latinclass ca. 9th grade: the text we had to translate contained the words trans means "on the other side of" or in german it can be translated to "Ć¼ber/ hinĆ¼ber". Also silvas; silvanis means "the forest" or in german "der Wald".
Trans silvas very simply translated into german would be Ć¼ber den Wald
Trans silvas -> Transsilvanien -> Ćberwald
My latin teacher gave me a very weird look as I suddenly facepalmed myself and groaned quietly.
The Venturi and Selachii feud is what killed me when I got it.
The Venturi Effect is a scientific term referring to the acceleration of a liquid through a narrow tube (like a jet).
Selachii is a classification of sharks. (I discovered this when my stepson got really into sharks)
... fucking HELL Terry.
In Carpe Jugulum, Count Magpyr boasts of having helped write the Malleus Maleficarum, along with the Torquus Simiae Maleficarum, the Auriga Clavium Maleficarum, and in fact the entire Arca Instrumentorum.
The Malleus Maleficarum is a very real, very nasty and absolutely batshit insane book from late 15th-century Germany, basically laying out the procedure for catching, torturing, and executing witches. Its title translates to The Hammer of Witches. The other titles are Pratchett's inventions.
Malleus = "hammer" Torquus Simiae = "monkey wrench" Auriga Clavium = "bucket of nails" Arca Instrumentorum = "box of tools"
āThe LEGO Movie was my favorite movie of 2014, but it strikes me that the main character was male, because I feel like in our current culture, he HAD to be. The whole point of Emmett is that heās the most boring average person in the world. Itās impossible to imagine a female character playing that role, because according to our pop culture, if sheās female sheās already SOMEthing, because sheās not male. The baseline is male. The average person is male. You can see this all over but itās weirdly prevalent in childrenās entertainment. Why are almost all of the muppets dudes, except for Miss Piggy, whoās a parody of femininity? Why do all of the Despicable Me minions, genderless blobs, have boy names? I love the story (which I read on Wikipedia) that when the director of The Brave Little Toaster cast a woman to play the toaster, one of the guys on the crew was so mad he stormed out of the room. Because he thought the toaster was a man. A TOASTER. The character is a toaster. I try to think about that when writing new charactersā is there anything inherently gendered about what this character is doing? Or is it a toaster?ā
ā Bojack Horseman creator Raphael Bob-Waksberg commenting on how weird gendered defaults in entertainment are, and why we should think twice about them. Excerpted from this longer original post. (via 360degreesasthecrowflies)
#Shit I say this stuff all the time#Default is not male#Women are not a different species from men#Itās a toaster itās make believe it can be whatever you fucking want it to be#Also voice actors get cast in the āwrongā gender roles all the time#Do you know how many little boy characters are played by women#Do you know how many little boy characters are played by *Tara Strong*???#I did not watch an anime in which an adult man is played by a woman VA for 90 fucking episodes in the 90s#To have to suffer the stringent gender opinions of men who feel too threatened by the idea that a woman could be their equal
The Lego Movie, Kung Fu Panda, Ant-Man
Part of a long tradition of movies in which, in order to demonstrate that the underdog EveryMan can succeed, he displaces a woman with much more talent and training and weāre not meant to think too hard about the implications of that
(Donāt worry! Talented well-trained women are allowed to be love interests as a consolatio prize.)
This is known as the Trinity Problem, because Trinity in the Matrix is a quintessential example. Trinity really should have been The One.
This is also an inherent feature of the Hero's Journey: The Lego Movie and The Matrix are classic examples of the Hero's Journey narrative. The Hero's Journey has been extremely influential, and is extremely sexist.
Important research for a story I'm writing! Not real life, never real life.
You are transported back in time and into the body of a young noblewoman in the 1400s. Your parents have married you off to an awful, abusive, rapist husband whom literally no one else would marry despite him being very high nobility because he's that terrible. You successfully produce a baby boy and then plan to murder this man for the good of everyone and yourself. Here is the question: do you think you could murder him in a way that is undetectable to the historical people around you? Note: they aren't stupid, you are the prime suspect as the battered wife AND you can't just say poison. Where are you going to buy poison? Do you know anything about poison actually? NO GOOGLING! You were sent back without a plan!
Do you think you could murder someone in the 1400s and get away with it with your modern know-how?
Yes, I totally have a plan (tell me for research purposes)
No, I realize that I'm very uninformed about murder
I have some ideas but I'm not sure they would work
Edit: my notes are full of murder. I love you all
Edit: to clarify about the poison, you can use poison if you actually know how to identify it, I'm saying you can't just go "Poison!" with no knowledge about poison. Buying it probably means they know that poison and you're caught. Your personal knowledge when you read this post is all you have.
Another point of clarity: You went through all that trouble to have a baby without modern medicine so you could get the sweet house after your husband died. That's why you can't be caught. No disappearing.
Edit again: Air embolisms are going on a high shelf because the syringe won't be invented for 350 years. Prove to me that you could make one from scratch, lol
I promise to stop making edits (lol): I left the country vague because I just wanted to see ideas for modern vs. past. Whatever place you are most knowledgeable about
So, here's the thing......... the medieval justice system didn't work like the modern justice system. There wouldn't be a detective who would come on the scene and collect and evaluate the evidence. I wouldn't be judged based on motive/means/opportunity. I'd be judged based on character and the entire political situation. Whether I could survive this situation would depend on what kind of alliances I have at court, and whether people believe I'm the kind of person who would murder or not. [Aside: witchcraft accusations weren't really all that widespread at this time - heresy, yes; witchcraft, not so much.] I have been patient enough to endure the rape and awfulness long enough to bear a son... during that time, if I have also made it very clear to the world that I am a pious Christian, if I have made friends with the nobility and the church and other powerful people, and if I am not foreign, chances are very good that I would get to keep the castle and reign as regent until my son grows up and takes over. If there is any suspicion about my character, though, it's not going to end well.
on laughter
maya angelou in an interview with bill moyers// strange the dreamer, laini taylor// ? // pride and prejudice, jane austen// @ ehimeora on twitter// herman hesse// @nothingbutloveforyou // run, taylor swift// aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe, benjamin alire sƔenz// jack kerouac
I thought I might share one of my new tattoos. A couple years ago, a dear friend and I coined the term āfish bag momentā
A fish bag moment might be sitting all alone in an empty new apartment after coming out and upending your life, or starting a new job in a brand new line of work because itās closer to your dreams
Itās what happens when you take a leap of faith or make a hard decision for yourself, when the future is so hard to visualize and everything feels scary. Youāre just a fish in a bag and you canāt see where youāre going
But youāre on your way to a bigger aquarium
In honor of a relatively unexpected and sudden transition in my life, I tried my hand at sculpting my beloved fish bag. Letās hope the kiln is kind ā¤ļø
It didnāt just survive the kiln, it thrived ā¤ļø to anyone out there who needs to hear it right now, rest assured: even if the path forward seems unclear, youāre on your way, and Iām proud of you
I'm on the cusp of a major life transition and I have absolutely no idea what my life is going to look like in a few months and I needed to hear this. Thank you.
have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.
they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.
their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.
longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years
toxic flesh
has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.
lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion
largest genome of any shark
eats everything including moose and polar bears
ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you
this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard
just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !
Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!
Dorota Skowronska-Krawczyk sits in her office, eyes fixed on the computer monitor in front of her. "You see it move its eye," says the UC Ir
I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks
Also they are very full of urea to keep them the same amount of salty as the ocean, to the point that they smell like pee, which is why there is an Inuit legend that they came from a goddess's chamberpot. That's why they're poisonous. Unless you let their meat ferment for a few months - then you can eat it.
I am glad not to be a Greenland shark; I donāt have enough thoughts to fill five hundred years. But I find the very...
I think it's so funny how we bred JOBS into dogs. I have two shih tzus and they were bred to be lap dogs. All they care about is looking cute and cuddling with people. Meanwhile my grandma has a border collie and that dog needs to feel so useful all the time, he acts like he will pass away if he doesn't have a job to do constantly
On one hand this is extremely fucking funny, but on the other hand, it really boggles my mind how many people punish their dogs for justā¦ doing the thing they were bred to do.
Your husky isnāt āhyperactiveā, itās bred to pull sleds for 8 hours straight and you have it in a 400 sq ft yard.
Your English sheepdog isnāt āpushyā, itās bred to herd sheep, and you have neither to space nor the herd to allow it.
Your terrier isnāt ānippyā, itās bred to kill rats and your hamster looks a hell of a lot like one.
Your Catahoula isnāt āmean to animalsā, itās bred to hunt any and all animals smaller than it, and you didnāt acclimate it to your cat.
Your Lhasa Apso isnāt āyappyā, itās bred to bark at any tiny noise and alert watchmen to intruders
Like Jesus Christ, if you canāt provide an environment where your dog canāt fulfill its literal life purpose, maybe?? Donāt get that dog??? And if you do, maybe know the breed characteristics so you can redirect those traits into more constructive outlets????
Both your most common doodle's parts (labra and golden) want to hunt and retrieve water birds so the best suggestion I can give y'all is congratulations on your new duck hunting hobby.
#people will overlook the perfect breeds to suit their needs based on just their looks#and get a work dog because it looks cool
tags from @gnarlystarships because YEAH
@gallusrostromegalus
Any time someone sees Herschel and says "AWWW I want a Corgi <3" (because he is Very Cute (TM)), I immediately reply: "Do not get a Corgi unless you have a job for it to do. They were bred to bully livestock across the hills of Wales. This is basically a Border Collie that knows he is cute enough to get away with murder. If you get one and it doesn't have a job, it will apply its livestock-bullying instincts to YOU. Herschel's job specifically is to help manage my crippling ADHD, because I don't have a bull for him to micromanage." This gets me odd looks at the home depot but it does get the point across.
I have owned two poodles. Poodles are water retrievers. They are bred to swim out into the lake to bring back the duck that you just shot out of the air.
Both of my poodles HATED water. HATED having wet paws. DID NOT WANT to go outside in the rain (I live in the PNW, so, uh, that was a lot of not wanting to go out).
But my first poodle absolutely felt the call of his breeding. Deep in his bones, he knew he was a water retriever. He got so excited when we were near a body of water, especially running water like a river. He did not want to touch the water, but the water called to him. And he knew that if there were things in the water, it was his job to make them not be in the water. Which led to adorably ridiculous scenes of my poodle standing with his paws as far from the water as he could get, while leaning and reaching with all of his might, to delicately pluck a lily pad from the water in his mouth and place it on the shore.
He didn't understand his job, he didn't want to do it, but he was absolutely compelled by his breeding to retrieve things from the water.
surely the conses wont quence
peer reviewed
does the body ALWAYS have to keep the score? maybe we could just have a friendly game this time. maybe we can just have fun without putting numbers on it
Invention of bread is weird bc itās like some Neolithic ppl were like āhey you know that tall grass thing thatās sorta edible but not really how about we take it and grind it into a very very fine powder which is extra backbreaking right now bc the wheel wonāt be invented for awhile and then we mix it with water and heat it up and you know what letās also toss some mold in there just to see what happensā
there are a number of distinct steps though, each of which can be observed in isolation.Ā āgrind tough seeds to make them edibleā is practiced with other foods besides grains (like acorns). the natural next step after that is to add water, which gives you porridge: a common ancient roman meal was puls,Ā very similar to modern cream of wheat. once you have that you also have a simple dough, and baking it to preserve it is a logical experiment (as is baking some you forgot about and left out for a few days, just so you donāt waste it... voila, leavened bread)
there could have been, and probably was (though iām not an archaeologist) a substantial time between each of these innovations. itās not too hard to imagine people being chill withĀ āgrind seeds for soup, select plants for bigger seedsā for a good while
Do you ever wonder how many amazing things are fated to go forever uninvented because each step necessary to invent them is a completely unintuitive thing to do?
Okay, that's not how bread was invented. I wrote a potted history, I could try to dig that out if anyone is interested?
Please do
I'm putting this on my bread blog, because of course I am. Also tagging @appendingfic who I think expressed interest.
Tens of thousands of years ago people foraged and hunted for their food and ate whatever they could. Among their forage were wild cereals, which included the ancestors of modern cultivated wheat, barley and others.
People like sweet things. Grains are starchy, but if sprouted they start converting those starches to sugars, so people would've left grains in water to sprout. These sprouts are also easier to digest, thus more nutritious, which bestowed an invisible advantage on those sprouting their grains.
If grains are left in water too long, however, they begin to ferment. Alcohol is produced. People like alcohol.
In ancient Mesopotamia the fermented grains were experimented with, resulting in an early form of beer. The process of making that beer was quite complicated and involved a combination of sprouted and mashed grains.
People wanted beer all year round, but early beers did not have long shelf lives and the grain could only be harvested at certain times. So the ancient Mesopotamians invented a way of storing the ingredients for beer.
It was made of the grain mash, honey, dates and spices that were fermented to make beer. For storage, prior to fermentation, the mixture was baked dry, cut into smaller pieces and baked again to remove all water. This produced bapir, a product very much like biscotti, which could be stored for later rehydration and fermentation. Sometimes it was eaten instead.
I've made bapir, and I've eaten it. It is brittle but delicious. It's also a form of unleavened bread.
Bread was invented as a way to store the ingredients for beer, which was most likely a development from a chance discovery. Leavened bread (that is, with bubbles) may well have been discovered when a mixture like that for bapir was accidentally allowed to ferment before baking. Yeast is responsible for both alcohol production and leavening.
There's a lot more to it, in terms of the cultivation of grains and the development of milling, than I've written here. It's been a process of millennia to go from chewing sprouts to eating soft white bread like that pictured. But every step along the way was small and simple.
I never would have guessed that beer pre-existed bread. I've always just assumed that beer was an accidental discovery by breadmakers.
Nope, beer came first. Mead is also very old.
Thanks, ancient humans!
Australian First Nations people developed their own bread making culture independent of the beer-base route. As far as I'm aware, pre colonial Australia had little to nothing by way of fermented drinks at all, so the likelihood of beer being part of the evolution of native breads is unlikely. Their breads, made from native grasses, are both leavened and unleavened. There's also different bread making practices using different grains, dependent on location - Australia is big and Indigenous culture over here is no more a monolith than it is anywhere else. Kamilaroi bread is different to Yuin bread, for example.
The colonization of Australia actively suppressed Indigenous knowledge, and creating an image of the idle wandering tribes was required to justify taking Aboriginal lands. This means a lot of the archeology of how First Nations people developed their breads has not just been lost but deliberately suppressed. The idea that they were settled enough to have ovens, let alone a bread-making tradition, is only now really being examined. I wouldn't be surprised if the grains-porridge-bread route was true for Aussie breads, though.
Archeological/historical evidence such as this is what makes me skeptical of the current (is it still current?) of the so-called "Paleo Diet," and the insistence that eating grains and carbs is somehow "unnatural."
- Mort, Terry Pratchett (#4 Discworld)
Kelly Link, 21st April 2026
āIt is extraordinary that nobody nowadays under the stress of great troubles is turned into stone or a bird or a tree or some inanimate object; they used to undergo such metamorphoses in ancient times (or so they say), though whether that is myth or a true story I know not. Maybe it would be better to change oneās nature into something that lacks all feeling, rather than be so sensitive to evil. Had that been possible, these calamities would in all probability have turned me to stone.ā
ā The Alexiad, written by Anna Komnene,Ā the daughter of the Byzantine Emperor Alexios I Komnenos, c. 1148.
Yes, let me be a tree. Let me sit patiently, slowly sucking nutrients through the giant straws of my being, my growth speeding and slowing as the seasons dictate, while I wait for the current stresses and horrors to pass. Let me feel the tingling of mycelium on my roots and the warmth of the sun on my leaves while the short-lived humans suffer through their dark time. Let me still be there, still patiently expanding, when the humans remember that they can only survive if they love and care for one another. My fellow trees and I, quietly redistributing our nutrients through our roots, providing homes for birds and squirrels and insects, slowly digesting the remnants of our loving forbears, have known this for a long time, but the humans forget every few generations and have to be reminded. They will remember again, and they will remember their connection to the earth, and I will still be here.
my bedsheet is pregnant and it's. the rest of my laundry
another one for the collection, gang.
@argumate
you verb noun?
You verb noun? You verb noun like the comparison? Oh!! Punishment for title! Punishment for amount of time!!!!
You deconstruct meme? You deconstruct meme into its base parts? Oh!! Explanation for readers! Explanation for one thousand reblogs!!!!
Miette, the gift that keeps on giving.
āUse your gifts and your talents to greatest possible effect while you can. Spread joy wherever possible. Laugh at jokes. Tell jokes. Make puns and bugger the embuggerances. Read books. Read my books. You might like them. You might find something else you like even more than them. Look for these things in life.
Question authority. Champion good causes. Speak out against injustice. Do not tolerate bullies or bigots or racists or anti-intellectuals or the narrow-minded. Use your education to challenge them. Broaden their perspectives. Make the world you interface with a happier place.
These are your choices. Choices you have been fortunate to have been given, so donāt waste them while you have them. Donāt look back in years to come and wish you had grasped a fleeting opportunity. Grasp it now with both hands, Live. Strive. Love.ā
from A Little Advice for Life taken from āTerry Pratchett: from birth to death, a writer.ā
āSir Terry Pratchett; April 28, 1948 ā March 12, 2015
One of the greatest compliments I've ever received is that I resemble Sam Vimes.
Mind how you go.
Happy birthday to Sir Terry. Mind how you go.
