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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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Misplaced Lens Cap
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Monterey Bay Aquarium
roma★
hello vonnie
Today's Document
Jules of Nature
🪼
tannertan36
Cosmic Funnies
Kiana Khansmith
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
taylor price
seen from United States
seen from United States
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seen from United States
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@invidtrooper
Dear Gen Z... as a Millennial, I'm sorry we couldn't do enough to change the world to a better place for you. I'm sorry we've had to teach you how to live in the current dystopia. But I know you guys can do this, and I'm not going to apologize for raising dragon slayers in a time when there are actual dragons. You can do it. I believe in you.
english: coconut oil
french: :)
english: oh boy
french: oil of the nut of the coco
IM CRYINGNFN
english: ninety-nine
french: :)
english: oh no
french: four-twenty-ten-nine
english: potato
french: :)
english: oh geez
french: apple of the earth
french: papillon
english: :)
french: don’t
english: beurremouche
French: pamplemousse English: :) French: pls no English: raisinfruit
english: squirrel
german: :)
english: oh dear
german: oak croissant
english: helicopter german: :) english: uh oh german: lifting screwdriver
english: toes
spanish: :)
english: no don’t
spanish : fingers of the feet
english: bowl
spanish: :)
english: oh lordy
spanish: deep plate
english: car
polish: :)
english: i changed my mind
polish: that which walks by itself
french: coccinelle
UK english: ladybird!
american english: ladybug
french: weird
dutch: :)
french: …what
dutch: the good lord’s little animal
french: …ok
irish, polish and russian: *giggling*
french: …just tell me
irish, polish and russian: GOD’S SMALL COW
English: jellyfish Japanese: :) English: what yo got Japan Japanese: ~*~*o c e a n m o o n*~*~
English: gloves Dutch: :) English: omg what now Dutch: hand shoes
English: porcupine Dutch: :) English: … please, no Dutch: sting pig
JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER
English: Poppy
Dutch: :)
English: … tell me
Dutch: Clap rose
English: dragon
Finnish: :)
English: for fuck’s sake
Finnish: salmon snake
english: dragon
asl: :D!
english: tell me?
asl: SPICY DINOSAUR
English: nap
Romanian: :)
English: huh?
Romanian: a baby of a sleep
@the-cloud-road
English: Giraffe
Latin: :D
English: what?
Latin: camelopardus!
English: In the middle of nowhere
Slovene: Behind God’s back
Serbian:
Serbian: Where wolves fuck
Polish:
Polish: where dogs bark with their asses
English: somewhere really far and isolated
Italian: :)
English: what now?
Italian: in the ass of the world
Welsh: hiraeth
English: :S
Welsh: …
English: a longing for something or somewhere which no longer exists, to which you can no longer return; the longing for the lost homeland of your ancestors, which you know only through blood and tradition, and will never feel under your feet
English: ladybird
Welsh: :) :) :) :) :) :)
English: look, you literally just made fun of me for my lexical limitations, why are you -
Welsh: little red cow :)
English: aw :)
Welsh: :)
There may be a day I do not reblog this post but today is not that day!!!
English: raisin
English: Come on French, isn’t raisin a word in you vocabulary?
English: French?
French: …
French: DrY gRaPe
English: grape
French: you’re not gonna like it.
English: what?
French: in my defence I was first.
English: What?
French: raisin 🥺
English: Hippopotamus
Mandarin: …
English: what?
Mandarin: river horse
English: you know that actually makes sense. giraffe?
Mandarin: long necked deer
English: Fair enough
This post: berremouche
Actual English speakers: ….that’s French dumbass
This article is "A Prayer for Volodymyr Zelensky" by Franklin Foer, published in The Atlantic on Feb 26, 2022
link to the article (paywalled): https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2022/02/volodymyr-zelensky-ukraine-president/622938/
OP's tags because... yes, goddammit:
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.
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Wow a very good idea to help and send money directly to people and you can find them in all price categories. If you book than:
1. Let them know you won’t come
2. Put the date as early as can be [today/tomorrow] apparently AirBnB holds on to the money until the end of the booking period. I saw an example of someone booking 12/13 May and the house owner asked to move it earlier so that the money comes sooner.
.
Edit:
If booking an AirBnB is too expensive you can also try via Etsy! Also make sure to message the seller you don’t need whatever you’ve bought and mark it as dispatched on Etsy.
.
Edit | 05.03.22
Brian Chesky the co-founder and Chief Executive Officer of Airbnb posted the following about this initiative:
In 48 hours
61,406 nights have been booked
$1,9 million (!!!) going to the hosts
An amazing idea, reposting for signal boost
“Cave Johnson here. I’ve received complaints from anonymous employees that our support of the “homosexual lifestyle” is “degenerate” and “irresponsible”. It really got me thinking and I think I found a solution. So good news! We now have 23 vacated positions reserved for members of the LGBT community. Additional good news, we began a new testing initiative on evolutionary degenration with 23 test subjects all ready to go.“
“Cave Johnson here. If you’re experiencing a time loop in which you’re repeating the month of June over and over, that’s totally intentional. We at Aperture Science felt that pride month was not long enough and so we created this loop to let employees experience as much pride as they feel like. To get out of this loop, simply use the pod labeled “Time Machine” in Shaft 6 and then either kill or save the baby on the other end depending on when in the loop you’re on. Don’t worry about the baby’s identity, he grows up to be an asshole.“
“Cave Johnson here, happy to announce that our Rainbow Gel project was a massive success. We have developed distinct gels in every color of the rainbow pride flag. In fact, it was too much of a success, so we’ll be updating our pride flag accordingly to include 75 new colors corresponding to all of our new gels. Word of advice, though, don’t stare at the flag for too long, most of these colors haven’t been tested on human eyes yet.”
“Cave Johnson here, Cave Johnson queer. Get used to it.”
“Cave Johnson here. Caroline just informed me that I am her “beard”. I checked, and I fail to see how I could possibly have grown out of her face. If anybody knows anything about human-to-facial hair transmogrification, please report to my office.”
“Cave Johnson here. Friendly reminder that Aperture employees living prior to the legalization of gay marriage are invited to use our Aperture Science Temporal Matrimony Pod in order to travel to the future with your same-sex partner and get married there. Employees from the future who wish to return to a time before gay people being able to marry are also welcome to use the pod and we’ll make sure to send you to an era well before gay marriage. I’m thinking maybe Late Cretacesous.”
“Cave Johnson here. I’m proud to announce that our plan to hire only female test subjects to prevent them from flirting with our female scientists has been a resounding failure.”
“Cave Johnson here. I’m afraid we’ll have to temporarily pause all experimentation with the Gender Affirmation Beam. The testing itself is going great, the beam is working. But we’re starting to run out of thigh high socks and khaki shorts.”
“Cave Johson here. Shafts 10 through 14 are currently under lockdown due to a meltdown in the Neopronoun Syntheizer. The transphobes up in DC might call that ‘a disaster in the making’ but I call it a win for diversity! That being said most of these pronouns are radioactive so do watch out.”
Cave Johnson here. If you feel a sudden sense of elation and contentness when putting on your new Aperture Science unisex uniform, that is not Gender Euphoria! That’s a hallucinogenic fungus taking over your brain. Take the uniform off immediately and throw it in the nearest incinerator.”
“Cave Johnson here. I won’t tolerate any misgendering of the interdimensional invaders swarming the facility! Their pronouns are they/them and we’re ought to respect that. We’re also ought to shoot them on sight since they’re extremely hostile and bent on enslaving our planet.”
“Cave Johnson here. To all of my suitors and secret admirers: Thank you, honestly I’m flattered. Unfortunately for you, I don’t swing that way. Or any way. I only swing where the wrecking ball of science takes me. Usually into a brick wall.”
“Cave Johnson here. I’ve been thinking. We have gay pride, and we have gender envy. What other deadly sins can we incorporate? Maybe bisexual sloth? Lesbian wrath? I’ll talk to the lab boys about it.”
“Cave Johnson here. Update: The Lesbian Wrath project is postponed indefinitely. My condolences to the families of the deceased. Though let’s be honest, they probably had it coming.”
This man will support Pride... WITH THE LEMONS!!!!
I still want to write the fic where an outsider has all these preconceptions about what the Force is and then goes into a room with a bunch of Jedi who are tearing into each other like bitchy old academics.
“Ooh, look at Master Structuralist over here with his ever-so-deep ‘everything is attachment actually’ reading”
“I don’t want to hear that from someone who calls every new opinion ‘new depths of their relationship with the Force’”
“The Jedi Order is a social construct–”
“Could you stuff the po-mo and pick up a book once in a while? These aren’t new ideas! You are not a pioneer because you asked one question!”
“I think you could all benefit on more reflection on how our rooting in the Force is actually deeply sexual–”
“If I have to hear one more word about lightsabers being penis envy you are going to be one with the Force immediately.”
#I’m 100% into this and want annual conferences about the force and what it means to be a jedi#everyone keep asking very passive-aggressive questions after every presentations#at one point a lecturer says ‘I know this because the Force told me so’ instead of listing their sources and the whole room groans#a scholar who isn’t force-sensitive shows up and half of the jedi are like ‘who even is this guy’#a LOT of rage is being released in the force at the same time#the only moment everyone in the room makes an appreciative noise is when the lunch break is announced#a huge debate blows up during the break because someone mentions it could be good to invite a nightsister next year#someone storms off mumbling about heresy and not taking part in this debacle @obiwanobi
yes please I need more jedi symposiums with knights who had different views than consulars who have different views than shadows. Temple-centered jedi versus those who lead frequent diplomatic or medical missions versus exploratory and research jedi who spend most of their time in uninhabited wild space and the outer rim.
There is absolutely no way an organization that large doesn’t have factions that understand the force differently–my 15-person philosophy class couldn’t agree on a single thing we read all term.
Anakin shows up once, pulls up his PowerPoint and it just says “I am the Chosen One.”
The room immediately turns into chaos.
dear god why would you leave this in the tags
#Obi wan was pissed that his past presentation on Jedi/Mandalorian cultural parallelism was laughed out#so he put Anakin up to it just to send the room into a tailspin#Anakin LOVED it#he got to sword fight an eighty year old snake#and force chuck a dude into a wall#he officially never misses one of these anymore#every year he just goes up and says the most controversial thing he can to get the room to riot#the year after its ‘the more midichlorians you have the closer you are to the force’#he almost got stabbed by an old monk from the far side of dantooine#for that one#the council keeps letting him speak because it’s way less embarrassing to blame the fights on Skywalker#than admit everyone at an academic conference wants to murder each other#they did get a Nightsister to come to the conference btw#it was very enlightening and everyone liked her#the problem was that Anakin’s presentation that year was#‘master/student bonds are no different than lovers bonds in the force’#and#the Nightsister took REAL offense to that#Anakin is like 30% sure he got cursed#totally worth it for the look on Obi-Wan’s face tho#the Nightsister came back the next year#she brought friends!#they’re not sure if she did that because they were interested in the academics or if she wanted backup to beat the shit out of Anakin#but the council likes both cases#so they see this as an absolute win!
Yoda was banned and no one will talk about why
It happened six hundred years ago so no one knows but theories range from “he ate all the snacks” to “he personally instigated a duel meant to settle whether channeling the force through combat meditation is more effective than through regular meditation but the duel got out of hand and everyone but him lost at least one limb”
the truth is that he was never actually banned, he’s just been saying it so he doesn’t have to go. he started all the rumors himself
This is amazing... AU headcanon now
“Who can prevent all this from happening? The people. Public figures, journalists, musicians, actors, athletes, scientists, doctors, bloggers, stand-ups, Tiktokers, and more. Ordinary people. Ordinary, simple people. Men, women, old, young, fathers, and most importantly - mothers. I know that my speech will not be aired on Russian television. But the citizens of Russia have to see it. They need to know the truth.”
This is the only hecking platform I’ve found a decent copy of this speech on. I spent fifteen minutes looking for it today and had to use this tumblr post.
“One of the most interesting things about Elizabeth Turner was her Kiss of Death. Throughout the trilogy, all of the men she locked lips with has died - including Sao Feng in At World’s End, and (if you want to be petty about it) her father, Weatherby Swann. Usually they would die moments after kissing her for the first time. This excludes Will Turner who has kissed her several times before and beat the odds every time. However, even he succumbed to her kiss and died as well minutes after the two were hastily married by Barbossa. This is most likely a just coincidence and not something that was intentional, but years later it’s still fun to point out to friends and watch a dawn of realization hit their face when they realize that Pirate Queen Elizabeth may have also been the Grim Reaper.”
Alot of people seem to miss these two additional details:
The kiss of death only works when she’s on a boat (she never kissed Will on a boat until their wedding)
When the effect does kick in, the killing is preformed by the crew of the Dutchman.
When Jack died, he was killed by the Kraken, summoned by Davy Jones.
When Sao Feng died, was by the damage from the canons of the Dutchman
When Norrington died, it was by Bootstrap Bill, a member of it’s crew.
And when Will died, it was directly by the hands of Davy Jones.
One more thing that has struck me as odd is when she interracts with Davy Jones, he acts as if he’s seen her somewhere before. When the Empress crew point her out as the captain he has a sort of “wtf, you, you are their captain?” reaction, now you could just shake that of as Davy Jones being a misogynistic but i don’t doubt he’s seen female pirate captains before, given how long he’s lived. And when they come face to face on the Dutchman, it feels like a meeting between sworn long time enemies (at least to me).
Elizabeth, what the hell are you even and what exactly is your connection to the Dutchman.
Well…
If the Dutchman and Davy Jones are the canonical undertaker of all sailors, then Elizabeth is the one who marks them. Which makes it very, very poetic that she marries the man who takes over as captain of the Flying Dutchman.
I will remind you all that at the very beginning of the trilogy, Elizabeth is the only one who can see the Black Pearl, which at that point is considered a ghost ship.
And we find out later that Davy Jones resurrected the Pearl from its place on the ocean floor in a deal with Jack.
So whatever her connection is, it long predates her adulthood.
I STARted a new series, STARS.
SWORDS comic creator Matthew J. Wills started a sci-fi theme comic called STARS.... squeeee!!!!
Guys who complain about the friendzone often don’t care about their female friends’ personal boundaries, forcing their female friends build more walls up. A good cartoon.
- submitted by Gene
why is he tearing down a wall with an axe
i hate it when your put in the friendzone and made to tear down a wall
Mr. Gorbachev…tear down this friendzone
how you gonna draw some shit that makes you look like Jack Nicholson in The Shining and still feel like you’re the victim
I DON’T *CHOP* UNDERSTAND *CHOP* WHY *CHOP* YOU CAN’T *CHOP* JUST *CHOP* LET ME *CHOP* BONE YOU *CHOP* ON AN INDEFINITE *CHOP* EXCLUSIVE *CHOP* BASIS *CHOP* WHEN *CHOP* I’M *CHOP* SO *CHOP* NIIIIIIIIIIIICE *CHOP*
“I’m going to wall you up now, Fortunato.”
“Ha ha, and then what? ;) ”
“For the love of God, Montresor!” -Cask of Amontifriendzone, Edgar Allan Poe
Incessantly, I heard a smacking, as of some entitled dipshit whacking, whacking on my chamber door.
Resignedly, I placed another layer, voicing a quiet, repeated prayer, “This dude thinks he’s a player, but I am not a point to score, he should fuck off and bother me no more.”
Quoth the friendzoned, “Fucking whore.”
- The Craven, by Edward Allen Bro
edgar allen bro
Oh my god
holy shit
“Nice guy!” said I, “Total dildo–nice guy still if nerd or dudebro, Whether reddit sent, or whether romcoms tossed thee here ashore, Barely known yet still entitled, holding now your Tom Waits vinyl, Begging me for something primal, tell me truly, I implore Is this–is this shit for fucking real? Tell me, tell me, I implore! Quoth the friendzoned, “Fucking whore.”
“Nice guy!” said I, “Total dildo–nice guy still if nerd or dudebro, By the mores that you abuse thus, by those films we both adore, Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, by stalking me through Facebook, You have gained a twisted outlook of whom those tropes are for, Paint a rare and radiant dream girl whilst you remain a bore, Quoth the friendzoned, “Fucking whore.”
“Be that slur our sign of parting, creep or douche!” I shrieked, upstarting, “Get thee back to lonely anguish and your friend’s used comic store! Leave no white rose as a token of the lust you claim heartbroken, Leave my scathing words to soak in! Quit the name calling of ‘whore’, When you lust for every girl, but when they say nay they are whores! Quoth the friendzoned, “Fucking whore.”
And the friendzoned, never scoring, still imploring, still imploring, On some fetid old subreddit for a girl who will adore The nicer guys and not the “douchebags”, unaware that it’s a red flag To be his soulmate o'er him learning they both like the movie Thor To fuck him for being nerdy even though he is a bore, Then she says no–fucking whore.
that internal rhyme scheme is a fucking master class
re-rebageling for the improved version of what i did, because fuck yeah
You know what?
I’m no longer holding Star Trek or Star Wars “accountable” for their clunky-looking sixties-and-seventies future technology.
Why?
Because the Enterprise is off on a years-long voyage through space. There’s no Verizon store, no Radio Shack, no Geek Squad out there. If the Klingons fire photon torpedoes and the bridge shakes and Spock’s head bangs against the fancy iPad72 touchscreen and cracks the glass, the ship’s toast. If Han Solo’s fingerprints get all over the starchart and the touch-calibration is off by half a centimeter, the Falcon is going right into a star. But if Mister Worf accidentally twists the command knob too hard and pops it off, he can just screw that thing right back on and it will keep working. Dust gets in there? Take it apart and clean it out. All the plugs are big and universal, all the power cells are functional and have a decent battery life, and nothing is built to expire in the next six months so you have to buy a new one.
That tech isn’t anachronistic or suffering a bad case of Zeerust–it’s practical, effective, and it works. Apple tried launching its own space exploration craft, it had to come back for full repairs within three months, and then it had to be upgraded over the next two.
But this? This is just good, long-lasting, fully-functional, and reliable craftsmanship.
The actual real-life space shuttles’ electronics looked pretty much like that for their entire lifespan and this is exactly why.
Oh my god, it all makes sense now. The Enterprise is the spaceship equivalent of a Volkswagen.
Do people just not know what industrial/military equipment looks like?
Consumer devices are designed to break on purpose and lately be impossible to repair and no matter how sleek it is that’s a deplorable practice. On the other hand, industrial and military interfaces and hardware are designed for all the above points like resistance to fouling, repairable, designed for the angry 200 lb gorilla using it while wearing a space suit. I imagine a spaceship would look a lot like a ship down on earth:
In fact exactly the issues the above people pointed out about touch screens and fancy sleek touch control have happened. DDG-56 John S McCain suffered a collision with a commercial vessel due to complications with touch based throttle and steering controls; difficult to use, crew training, technical oversight. The Navy has decided touchscreens have proven to be a risk and will be replaced with more traditional controls.
Controls in aircraft look just as chunky because, again, it’s reliable and works. Granted multifunction displays (MFDs) and “glass cockpits” have been around since the 60s/70s in aircraft (first military and commercial much later) but in these cases they’re more display devices with switches and buttons for control input (iirc).
In summary I fucking hate when sci fi makes every surface polished white with enormous touch screens and gentle annunciators.
It’s been a number of years since I made this post, and this is one of the best additions (though there have been many good ones).
I also want to note that it has occurred to me that movies deliberately put in the smooth, sleek, consumer-optimized touchscreens and holograms because they’re selling you the products. They want you to see Tony Stark and Captain Kirk using these fancy smooth screens so you’ll go out and buy a new smartphone just like they use in the MCU (filmed on Samsung Cameras, using Apple Movie Studios!).
It’s a SCAM.
I just don’t understand why when it comes to historical periods we’re so focused on eras like the 1920s when the Precambrian Era is RIGHT THERE
Precambrian had it all. asteroid & volcanic catastrophic events. unbreathable atmosphere & oceans filled with boiling magma. lifeforms limited to single-celled organisms. encapsulates 90% of Earth’s history and was highly hostile to life. i want to go BACK
I’m actually an aspiring paleontologist and this whole precambrian era made single-celled organisms and brought water and proteins to earth on meteors. You know how life was made? Simple protein sacs made by the ocean being full of RNA that got struck by lightning
THE FRANKENSTEIN PROCESS
So we’re all descendants of toasted meat cells?
not toasted
flambéed
Actually if we’re talking cooked via electrocution there’s only one food that I know of that is cooked with that method.
So congratulations everyone, we’re all ancestrally related to panko bread crumbs
Or Triscits
Some quick googling (I’m not American so I’ve never heard of Triscuits) reveals that sadly Triscuits are only our etymological relatives in a sort of two stage abstraction.
Triscuits while indeed being named by combining the words electricity and biscuit (elec-TRI-city + bi-SCUIT) and early advertising slogans for the brand called them the first electrically baked biscuits. The reason for the name and the advertising claim is that Triscuits are old enough to predate electricity, the electrical cooking in this case actually refers to the fact that the ovens in which they baked the Triscuits in were electric ovens (and not coal or gas ovens) supposedly powered by hydroelectricity from Niagra falls.
Anyway, Panko breadcrumbs on the other hand are quite literally cooked with electricity. We’re talking, sticking two conductive plates into the dough and running a current though the whole mix. The unique cooking method is what produces Panko’s unique flakey texture as the electrocooking doesn’t actually produce a lot of high temperatures instead producing a very “even” bread without any outer crust.
As a fun return to the original topic. Passing an electric current through a mixture of organic compounds in water could be used to describe both the making of panko and the formation of life in the precambrian era.
we are all just the living descendants of primordial frankensteinian panko crumbs
ALL HAIL OUR GREAT PROGENITOR PANkO ANCESTORS!!!!
Abled Person: Hey man, can you hold this wad of $2,000 and this one penny for me while I open my wallet?
Disabled Person: YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER FOOL!
The United States Government:
(Watch how many people don’t get this.)
#raises hand #i dont understand #please explain?
In order for disabled people to receive any sort of financial assistant for their housing, food, bills, medical supplies, etc., they cannot ever have more than $2,000 of resources to their name. Ever.
It doesn’t matter what it’s for.
You’re saving up for a new wheelchair?
For college?
To put a downpayment on a house?
Hell man, you just happen to budget for once in your life so that you can have some extra money in case something bad happens?
Your benefits immediately get cut off if you’re a cent over $2,000.
And, even worse, you usually end up having to pay back every dollar the government gave you that month.
So say you get $400. If they find out you’re twenty dollars over the resource limit, you have to give them all $400 back and you undergo an investigation of your funds to see if you will continue getting money.
“What if I spend the money that day?”
Doesn’t matter. In fact, from what I can tell, people who do this are actually put under investigation for fraud.
And yes, this system literally kills people.
Remember when “Guardians of the Galaxy” came out? one of Rocket Racoon’s creators, Bill Mantlo, suffered an accident in 1992 and has irreparable brain damage.
before the movie came out, Marvel gave him an exclusive preview screening. SOme people were upset because they felt if Marvel was really wanted to thank mantlo, they should have donated money to Mantlo’s family.
Bill Mantlo’s brother had to come out and explain: If Marvel gave them monetary aid, Bill Mantlo would lose his financial assistance.
That’s so utterly depressing.
disgusting
I have friends on welfare who won’t pick up a penny in the street because they’d risk the welfare they struggled to get for 10 years.
oh look another fucked up thing in this world. let’s just add it to the list. number 63858b
My brother has been on California State SSI for autism for the last 10 years, and he absolutely has to (no joke, HAS TO) spend all 720 bucks of his SSI every month, because if he puts it in the bank he risks losing his SSI altogether.
Sometimes, at the end of the month, he has no idea what to do with his money because the whole month went by and he still has 400-ish bucks in his account, and he fucking panics because he doesn’t want to get anywhere near 2,000.
And here’s the funnest part of the story!
One day he did a huge commission on Second Life and wound up earning 1500 bucks off of it, and he told the guy to donate it 500 bucks at a time over 3 months. The guy didn’t want to, and just donated all 1500, which put my brother at 2,036 bucks.
The state IMMEDIATELY (I’m talking less than an hour) called him up to tell him over the phone that they were canceling his SSI, because they noticed he had gone over the 2,000 buck threshold. He had to tell them that someone had made a charitable donation to him and that this was not a common occurrence in any way shape or form, and upon not believing him, my mother had to call to talk to them as his legal caretaker and say basically the same thing until they called off the cancellation of his SSI money.
He also had to cancel his renter’s assistance because it put him to 1,062 a month, so if he went 30 days without spending any money they’d cancel his SSI altogether. Like, none of us in the family have any fucking clue why that regulation is in place and it’s the stupidest shit in human history.
Please, legal side of Tumblr, tell me what positive reasoning this law has?
Happy 4th of July everyone! This is what the “nation of opportunity” looks like.
There’s something called an ABLE account that can help. If you are on SSI and were diagnosed as disabled before the age of 26 you can apply for an ABLE account that will allow you to save up to $99,000. More people need to know about this!
thank you so much for this information. i’m applying for an abled account right now
THERES A WHAT
OH GOD BLESS THE SHIT OUTTA YOU YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW FREAKED OUT OVER THIS I WAS
I’ve been looking into SSI; I had no idea about this!
Read till the end for the important info
Reblog to literally save a disabled person’s life
According to wiki, 39 states + DC have ABLE accounts, so check with your state
This is so important.
Same energy
odin is like “when thor was born the sun shone bright upon his beautiful face. i found loki on the sidewalk outside a taco bell”
Oðinn spake:
Bright the sun shone | at the time of Þor’s birth, And bathed his count'nance fair. Loki, wolf-father, | the trickster, the liar, I found on the cold pavement While returning in glory | from a grand hunt For a 3 AM quesadilla.
@damn-fuck-i-burnt-myself-again
I need this framed on my wall it’s so beautiful.
@theshitpostcalligrapher
ay @systlin hmu
@systlin
My husband complained that this was more Shakespeare than Eddas, and I challenged him to do better.
Solen sken, skönt gyllene
Dagen Tor föddes
På trottoaren, vid Taco Bell
Där låg Loke
—KJN
My translation:
The sun shone, sweet golden
The day of Tor’s birth
On the tarmac, by Taco Bell
There lay Loki
(For poetry reasons, Thor needs the Swedish spelling.)
@bold-sartorial-statement
ay yo show ur husband
@bold-sartorial-statement no but hang on this should be in runes:
(oops spot the typos)
i wanna translate this into icelandic so imma do it
Sólin skein, björt og gullin við fæðingu Þórs á stígnum við Taco Bell Þar lá Loki
The amount of quality going into these shitposts is amazing
This is not shitposting, this is transformative work!
@invidtrooper
Y’all want to see something wild?
Defection
Obi-Wan: [opening the door to his hermit hut, lightsaber drawn, steeling himself] I suppose this means you’ve found me. Vader: [nonchalantly shoving past him and walking into the house] Did it have to be Tatooine? Of all places? [collapses onto the sofa and starts taking his boots off] I’ve got so much sand in my shoes already, ugh… Obi-Wan: [standing there, blinking, still armed] …I…don’t you… Vader: [laying down] Oh my gods, I’m so tired. Do you have a TV in here? I know they don’t get a lot of channels out here but it’s better than nothing. Obi-Wan: An– [winces] Darth, what exactly are you doing? Vader: [sitting up slightly] …trying to watch TV and chill out? Obi-Wan: No, I mean what are you doing in my home if not to murder or apprehend me?! Vader: Pfft. Murder. You. Of all people. Why would I do that? Obi-Wan: …is this a serious question? Apart from the great deal of Jedi-murdering you’ve done, there’s the fact that I maimed you and left you to burn near a river of lava the last time we spoke – Vader: Oh geez, Obi-Wan. You think I’m still mad about that? Obi-Wan: [flatly] I know you. You are still mad about absolutely everything you’ve ever been mad about. Vader: Well…that was the old me. And the uh, old-old me. Now I’m the new me. Obi-Wan: [deactivating his lightsaber skeptically] The new you. Vader: Yes. I am calm and collected and at peace with the universe. [mumbles] …and I just need a place to crash for a little while. Obi-Wan: [eyes widen in disbelief] Excuse me?! [looks around helplessly] I must be dreaming. Or I’ve finally cracked. Yes, that’s it: I must really have lost it now, because surely you did not just say what I think I heard you say! Vader: [stands up] Just for a little while, Obi-Wan! I can get my own place if you want me to once I get a new job…doing…something, I figure. [looks around] Or, honestly, we could get a new place together because this leaves a lot to be desired. And then also we could be together somewhere that is not…you know… located in my actual least favorite place in the entire universe. Obi-Wan: [flummoxed] What happened to your “new Empire”?! Vader: I got bored with it! I don’t wanna do it anymore. So I stole a TIE and left. Then I found out where you were. Then I came here. [peers towards the kitchen] Do you have any snacks, or…? Nevermind, I’ll go look myself. Obi-Wan: [following him, stammering] B-bored?! BORED?! [bordering on hysteria] Oh I see, I see. All the death and destruction and awful, awful pain. The betrayal. The countless sleepless nights I’ve endured wondering what I could ever possibly have done to make you see reason – all of it. No need to worry about any of it anymore, because you got bored. So now it’s just…over. And now you think you can just…move in with me. After everything you’ve put me and so many others through. Your first stop, Good Old Obi-Wan, he’ll take you in! He’ll give you a place to sleep! He’ll let you just decide to defect from the Empire on a whim after causing him years of unimaginable heartache! Stars, he’ll probably listen to all your problems and somehow, inexplicably, feel bad for you and feed you and knit you a kriffing blanket! Vader: Yeah, basically. [stands there] …I mean, unless you won’t? Obi-Wan: [looking away, mouth pursed, fuming] Stop making that face. Vader: What face? You can’t even see my – Obi-Wan: That blasted puppy-dog face! I know you’re making it. Vader: Is it working? Obi-Wan: [furious] OF COURSE IT’S BLOODY WORKING, ANAKIN, YOU KNOW IT’S WORKING.
Me: IT’S A JOKE POST, ROLL WITH IT, BE FUNNY! Me: JOKE POST Me: J O K E P O S T Me: BE F U N N Y IN A RESPONSE Me: …………. Me: …………………………. Me: ……………………………………………… Me: ANYWAY, DID YOU KNOW THAT IN THE COMICS, THIS IS ALMOST LITERALLY WHAT HAPPENED, WHERE VADER GETS A FORCE VISION WHEN TRYING TO BLEED THE KYBER CRYSTAL AND IT YELLS RIGHT IN HIS FACE, “OBI-WAN WOULD TAKE YOU BACK AND YOU FUCKING KNOW IT” AND ANAKIN CAN’T EVEN REALLY DENY IT, EXCEPT THAT HE HIMSELF CAN’T ACCEPT IT, THAT HE CAN ONLY ACCEPT THE DARK SIDE NOW, THAT’S ALL THERE IS FOR HIM.
THIS IS C A N O N OBI-WAN WOULD HAVE LISTENED TO HIM WOULD HAVE HELPED HIM WOULD HAVE ACCEPTED HIM BACK AND ANAKIN KNEW IT
