Making Myself Everyone’s Problem

cannot believe this URL wasn’t taken | Loretta Giovanni | she/her/meh | Fictive (NOT a RP blog) out of a World of Darkness world | dragon, necromancer, Italian, I got it all babey. you want it hot? you want it gross? I gotchu

[wizardelf]

[stjohnstarling]

All the men I hunt for sport are sustainably and ethically sourced.

[goslinggf]

i feel like i'm going Italian

[goslinggf]

*insane

[ilovemesomevincentprice]

Bringing this back....for reasons.

Vincent Price on filming The Ten Commandments...

"There was a scene where I had to whip John Derek to death,” laughed Vincent. “Well, he deserved to die; Anybody that pretty should be whipped. I took lessons on how to use the whip for about two months. I really had a man who came everyday and I took on the whip to the point I could do anything with it. Like whipping a cigarette out of people’s mouths.”

[unicarcass-archive]

ONE OF MY FAVORITE VIDEOS EVER

[jaydove-writes]

That's nyctophilia. Necrophilia is an obsession with the number 9.

[lavender-lentils]

No, you’re thinking of nonaphilia. Necrophilia is the concept of putting friends and family in favourable positions, not because theyre the best at those positions, but because you know them.

[jaydove-writes]

You're thinking of nepotism, necrophilia is the name of the main villain of the DS classic, Kirby Mass Attack.

[kcbutontblr]

no actually, i think you're thinking of necrodeus! necrophilia is a fictional grimoire appearing in stories by the horror writer hp lovecraft and his followers.

[jaydove-writes]

That's the necronomicon. Necrophilia is the belief that nothing matters, used in both positive and negative connotations.

[jantesika]

I believe that's Nihilism. necrophilia is summoning and speaking to the dead!

[jaydove-writes]

That's necromancy, necrophilia is the country Dutch people come from.

[ingridverse]

That's the Netherlands. Necrophilia is an old-fashioned thin disk shaped candy that comes in rolls

[theeclectickoalastudent]

Those're Necco Wafers. Necrophilia is the illness where you fall asleep under stress.

[bluejay-07]

I believe you’re thinking of narcolepsy. Necrophilia is the fictional magical ability to raise the dead, with varying degrees of sentience. It features heavily in The Locked Tomb series.

[renee-niles]

No, dude, that's necromancy again. Necrophilia is a large cemetary with elaborate tombs built to house remains, like a city of the dead.

[starburstdragon]

Im pretty sure that’s a necropolis. Necrophilia is a post-mortem examination on an animal species.

[mister-e-muss]

Nah, you’re thinking of a necropsy. Necrophilia is a type of angel that’s said to be part human. Shadowhunters books use it as a concept I think.

[phrenic-a]

Nope you’re thinking of Nephilim. Necrophilia is a free virtual pet website popular in the early 2010s

[saintofdoubt]

No, you're thinking of Neopets. Necrophilia is a newly formed word.

[veradragonjedi]

Nah, you're thinking of neologism! Pretty sure necrophilia is an American operating company that is best known for stock car racing, considered to be one of the top ranked motorsports organizations in America.

[beansfrombeans]

pretty sure that's NASCAR, necrophilia is actually the term for someone who doesn't feel like they fully fit the label "man" or "woman"

[darkaviarymc]

No, you're thinking of nonbinary. Necrophilia is a type of infection where the cells spreading out from a central point, for example: a spider bite, start to die.

[cetos-tide]

No, you’re thinking of necrosis. Necrophilia is nonmetal element on the periodic table that makes up most of Earth’s atmosphere.

[mikkeneko]

Pretty sure that's nitrogen. Necrophilia is a type of hand weapon that reinforces the fingers for a punch

[fluffmugger]

nah that's a knuckle duster. Necrophilia is the death of cells through injury or disease

[dalniente]

That's necrosis again, pretty sure. Necrophilia is a drug that affects mood or behavior, or relieves pain but induces drowsiness.

[elfwreck]

No, that's a narcotic. Necrophilia is the abnormal fear of anything new.

[sparkylurkdragon]

No, I believe that's neophobia. Necrophillia is flesh-eating disease.

[smellmyhead]

Nah, bud, pretty sure that's necrotizing fasciitis. Necrophilia is the wise old rat who helps out Mrs. Frisby in the book that got adapted into THE SECRET OF NIMH.

[mousefists]

No that’s Nicodemus. Pretty sure Necrophilia is that inventor guy who did revolutionary science stuff but now his name just makes me think of cyber trucks and the collapse of the US governmental system.

[smellmyhead]

Uh-huh, nope, you're thinking of Nikola Tesla. Understandable mix-up. No, necrophilia is a smooth, fuzzless peach.

[youandsometimeswhy]

you're thinking of a nectarine. necrophilia is when you don't want people around where you live to do things that might be good for the greater community and you might agree in theory, but you don't want it where you can see/hear/smell/etc it

[smellmyhead]

No, that's NIMBYism. Necrophilia is the iridescent mineral accretion that some bivalves secrete to coat (and protect themselves from) parasites they accidentally ingest

[globalincident]

No that's nacre. Necrophilia is a book written by Aristotle, discussing ethics and how to live a virtuous life by forming beneficial habits.

[smellmyhead]

Oh -totally understandable confusion here, you’re referring to Nicomachean Ethics, whereas Necrophilia (as I’ve recently learned) is a “post-grunge” band out of Alberta, Canada.

[aradia-queen-of-the-sheep]

It's very easy to get confused, but that's actually Nickelback. Necrophilia is an old timey movie theatre, where admission only cost a five cents.

[opalescent-apples]

That's a nickelodeon. Necrophilia is that pokemon that tried to eat the sun back in the gen 7 games.

[flipperdipper10]

Nonono that's Necrozma

Necrophilia is a 2d shape with 9 sides and 9 angles.

[ladylolalilly]

No, that’s a nonogon. Necrophilia is a piece of jewelry worn around the neck.

[the-imaginary-ditto]

No, that's a necklace. Necrophilia is a Warhammer 40K faction consisting of ancient robots.

[wraith-the-rock]

no, i’m pretty sure that’s the Necrons, necrophilia is the 60th element on the periodic table with the symbol Nd

[the-one-and-only-overlass]

No, that's neodymium. Necrophilia is a medical specialty focused on kidney disease.

[indizureberry]

Nah, that's nephrology. Necrophilia is when the brain is wired differently than others

[opalescent-apples]

That's neurodivergence. Necrophilia is the sweet stuff that hummingbirds and bees drink from flowers.

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

No no no, that's nectar. Necrophilia is actually a Finnish company that makes very rugged mobile phones.

[el-the-cell]

No! That’s nokia! Necrophilia is a kind of ice cream composed of chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry, named after an italian city.

[sarahwatchesthings]

That's Neapolitan. Necrophilia is a Greek philosophical movement that defines the origin of all reality as an indescribable source called the One.

[origami-butterfly]

Actually that's neoplatonism! Necrophilia is the addictive chemical in cigarettes.

[pizzagirlll]

All of you need a dictionary, that's nicotine, #REALPERVERTS who love violating corpses like a GOD FEARING RED BLOODED PATRIOT obviously know what necrophilia is. Its the fear of death of course!

[darkaeldari]

If I had a time machine I'd go forward in time and dig up my own bones.

.....for what purpose

[yamibree]

they're mine

[darkaeldari]

ah I see. reclaiming the Self

[babushkaat]

[babushkaat]

[wizardelf]

[phantom-threaded]

Isabella Rossellini in Death Becomes Her 1992, dir. Robert Zemeckis

[scientifichubris]

Mad scientists will be like "I know a place" and then strap you onto the autopsy table

[cunt-inent]

only an autopsy if you're dead... please use the proper name for my vivisection table

[schakira]

[barstoolblues]

"we need to invent truth serum" its called RED WINE

[labdynastes]

"OK" SO IT SEEMS AS THOUGH MY GENETICALLY MODIFIED KILLER BEETLES HAVE ESCAPED. HAS ANYONE SEEN MY FUCKI🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲OH G🪲OD🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲 SHI🪲🪲T🪲🪲🪲🪲🪲🧪AAAHHHHHHHHOOOHhh Hey. That One Learned thge basics of Chemistry . #Proud

[wellshitcaitlin]

@inneskeeper this seems relevant to your interests

BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE! SHE DOIBLES DOWN!

It is actually rare that I get shown stuff that could ACTUALLY be the spawning point of a new and proper named heresy within Holy Roman Catholicism.

“Jesus actually survived the crucifixion” is legitimately one of the most terrifyingly viable heretical traditions you could start. It fulfills the exact ramifications for a popular and overwhelming heresy: It supports and glorifies Christ’s strength (so powerful he could not die in a meaningful way), encouraging different theological philosophies and understandings of the source material, and is COMPLETELY RUINOUS about the WHOLE POINT of Jesus as the Lamb of God. He is destined to die to take on the sins of all humanity forever so we can br forgiven. The death and the resurrection of Christ after his journey into Hell for three days is cosmologically as important as the Trinity. It is one of the pivotal foundations of the entirety of the religion.

If Jesus didn’t die, he didn’t die for us. That changes a LOT of things. But it is at its root a heresy which is not anti-Christian and is instead just a completely irreconcilable veneration.

I love this woman. I need to encourage her to be like this.

[tyrannosaurus-trainwreck]

tOxIcItY iS a ChArAcTeR tYpE this is fucking amazing

[tyrannosaurus-trainwreck]

Okay it’s been several hours and I’m still not even slightly over this.

Like, Jesus said “I am the resurrection and the life, except the resurrection bit is metaphorical, because I’m too swole to actually die.”

“For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, but not really, for he made his only begotten son super fucking butch. Like, obviously way too butch to actually succumb to a little crucifying.”

“Pilate was surprised to hear that he was already dead. Summoning the centurion, he asked him if Jesus had already died. The centurion said to him, ‘Jesus is too shredded to kill, he’s like the Terminator, nothing can take him out.’ Pilate sent Joseph away with nothing, for Jesus was indestructible.”

“The angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified but absolutely did not die. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he was just taking a little nap. Then go quickly and tell his disciples: ‘He never died, you all really jumped the gun this time.’”

“The Son of Man is going to be betrayed into the hands of men, but it would take an atomic bomb to kill him, he’ll be fine.”

[espanolbot2]

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone, for he shall be positively jacked, and for his swollage will enable him to bung the biggest rock he could lay his turkey-sized hands upon those that displease him. Amen.

[fade-steppin]

anyone want to start a new branch of christianity with me? i’m calling it Unkillable Jesus

[tanukiham]

turns out they very much did not kill jesus

[internerdionality]

How dare you leave “ma’am? MORMONS don’t even do that” in the tags

[rednines]

[bunniope]

okay. which of you motherfuckers taught my vile little homunculus how to put on eyeliner

[bunniope]

it is fucking serving.

[hemipenal-system]

dragon alterhumans on tumblr reblog this post and put in the notes if you have a hoard and what you hoard if you do. im curious

[arethinn]

I don't use the word "alterhuman" but I figure I count for this purpose... by this point my Pictures folder probably counts as a hoard lol. I have some stuff in there I downloaded off CompuServe in the early- to mid-1990s.

[the-bone-witch-dragon]

I hoard fabrics in theory, though in practice I only have one piece right now - a nice rainbow silk blend scarf.

My headmate Rani hoards crystals, stereotype that it is (affectionate).

[quiet-oracle]

[pidoop]

[redstonedust]

Queer italian mobster: I eva' tells you bout da' time wit' my polyamorous grandparents? so der' i was wit' My Grandmuddah, Rest her soul, My Grandmuddah, Rest her soul, My GrandMuddah, Rest her soul, My GrandNonbinary, Rest dey' Soul, My Grandmuddah, Rest her soul, My Grandmuddah, Rest her Soul, My Grandmuddah, Rest Her Soul, My Grandmuddah,

you guys cant keep putting banger posts in my inbox i cant take credit for this