top 10 moments from “venom,” the greatest romantic comedy of all time, in order
10. when anne says venom wanted to them to kiss eddie and venom doesn’t deny it even slightly and eddie just rolls with it like “yeah that sounds legit”
9. “it’s up my ass” the moment symbrock shippers everywhere had this exact expression
8. “YOU’RE A LOSER, EDDIE.” like damn not even trying to take the edge off there huh??? great pitch, venom
7. when venom goes on the big “hahahaha we’re taking over the world” rant and eddie’s like “can i at least make a pitstop on the way???” and venom literally goes “OH YEAH OF COURSE, I’M NOT UNREASONABLE”
6. that random guy who sees venom and eddie in a carchase, causing chaos and bloodshed in the street, and starts recording it on his phone
5. when venom starts talking about killing a dude and eddie’s like “VENOM HE HAS A FAMILY!!!!!!”
4. “THE TRUTH IS, I’M KIND OF A LOSER ON MY PLANET” venom decides to betray his whole species because a) he met eddie brock, and b) he likes being cool for once. honestly? mood.
3. “THE WAY I SEE IT… WE CAN DO ANYTHING WE WANT”
how that line seemed in the trailer: dark, creepy, threatening, foreboding, “JOIN THE DARK SIDE OR DIE MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA”
how that line actually was in context: upbeat, cheerful pep talk given to a loser by his favorite parasite symbiote
*cut to eddie using the very accessible elevator*
1. the fact that they literally don’t even slightly attempt to explain how venom survived at all. just “of course his gay ass survived, you goddamn monsterfuckers, how else would we have the sequel, VENOM: AN ASSKICKING HONEYMOON”
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