reach heaven by violence @luggifer4 - Tumblr Blog

the thing is, im always interested in The Paperwork. whenever The Characters moan and groan about The Paperwork and whenever it's left unspecified what The Paperwork entails i go aw... The Paperwork... u dont deserve this attitude, The Paperwork... im sure you're very interesting and important... this is because i like my job at The Paperwork factory and because i like homework and it's also because The Characters often hold positions of power attained through superhuman abilities and enforced with violence and i know that The Paperwork is there, aspirationally, to document their actions and protect people. from institutional neglect and from The Characters. when The Characters ignore The Paperwork to fuck each other on The Desk i think less of them for it. i do.

i made this post offhandedly, but resentment/dismissal of The Paperwork is a trope from procedural fiction and commercial sff that is really really common in fanworks bc it makes for an easy shorthand when u don't want to research or invent the details of a job, and i do seriously want to ask everyone to get skeptical of it. it's part of a broader narrative type of the ultra-talented Maverick, usually law enforcement or pseudo law enforcement (e.g. a monster hunter, a status-quo-enforcing time traveler, a man in black, a moral mercenary, etc.), whose ability to police the boundaries of Civilization ("normal," defined by hegemony, Flawed But Worth Preserving!) and protect a homogenous Public (white, heteronormative, bourgeois, documented, "law-abiding," "innocent," helpless!!) is limited not by his energy or ability, but by forces (small-minded, foolish, persnickety, overcautious, sexless, dull, effeminate!!!) of Overhead, from whence comes... The Paperwork.

The Paperwork might be generated by administrators, journalists, lawyers, judges, civilian oversight committees, the village elders or the intergalactic legislature, depending on the story. and who benefits from us telling each other stories that belittle & villainize those professions while lionizing The Maverick? "if only The Maverick were given unlimited resources, unlimited access, unlimited privacy in his operations, and unlimited use of excessive force, he would be able to protect The Public (and find love! maybe on The Desk)." you see it, right? this is how copaganda will get in your head.

no these are great tags! thank you!

not going to include all of prev's tags bc there's a personal anecdote that i dont want to put on blast to thousands of strangers but i think this is also a worthy qualification! ty prev!

can-i-make-image-descriptions

@can-i-make-image-descriptions hi wait so sorry 2 trouble u but can u do this version <:-]

[Image IDs: Tumblr tags. Image #1: bureaucratic processes are interesting in their own right and provide insight into the mechanisms of power and control, what must be documented? what doesn't matter? where does the information flow? who is left out?, is the paperwork actually on paper? can you get away with not doing the paperwork? who if anyone holds you accountable if you do not? how?, who needs to sign what? who gets to ask for more? who has to settle for less?, and all the questions I don't know to ask, this is meaningful information in a story and in real life, though the idea of paperwork is (when disconnected from structure) neither a moral good nor evil, we exist as they say in a society, and then purpose of a system is what it does, this is all tangential I guess

Image #2: paperwork as recordkeeping is different from paperwork as gatekeeping. and ime most ppl interact with the latter way more., and recordkeeping is important and neutral. but now How it's written or what it demands etc. and therefore it Is interesting/important, to the story at hand. but i think Part of the reason ppl complain/accept the complaint is the record vs gatekeeping part of it., but it all gets lumped together incorrectly--to the benefit of mavericks and bigots and exploitationist fuckshits

Image #3: i'mg going to toss out an idea here. i think part of the reason the general public goes along with this en masse, is yes bc of the oversaturation of it the success of copaganda etc all of that, but i Also think it's because--paperwork is Very Different for the average person than it is for the Professional person /End IDs]

oneheadtoanother

jackthebard

Just remember. There is no such thing as a fake geek girl. There are only fake geek boys. Science fiction was invented by a woman.

sourcedumal

shuttersmiley

Specifically a teenage girl. You know, someone who would be a part of the demographic that some of these boys are violently rejecting.

foxsan-deactivated20140515

Isaac Asimov.

sim0nbaz-deactivated20170205

yo mary shelley wrote frankenstein in 1818 and isaac asimov was born in 1920 so you kinda get my point

fancyeliza-deactivated20200804

If you want to push it back even further Margaret Cavendish, the duchess of Newcastle (1623-1673) wrote The Blazing World in 1666, about a young woman who discovers a Utopian world that can only be accessed via the North Pole - oft credited as one of the first scifi novels

Women have always been at the forefront of literature, the first novel (what we would consider a novel in modern terms) was written by a woman (Lady Muraskai’s the Tale of Genji in the early 1000s) take your snide “Isaac Asimov” reblogs and stick it

even in terms of male scifi authors, asimov was predated by Jules Verne, HG Wells, George Orwell, you could have even cited Poe or Jonathan Swift has a case but Asimov?

PbbBFFTTBBBTBTTBBTBTTT so desperate to discredit the idea of Mary Shelly as the mother of modern science fiction you didn’t even do a frickin google search For Shame

cryptovalid

And if you want to go back even further, the first named, identified author in history was Enheduanna of Akkad, a Sumerian high priestess.

gunthatshootsennui

Kinda funny, considering this Isaac Asimov quote on the subject:

Mary Shelley was the first to make use of a new finding of science which she advanced further to a logical extreme, and it is that which makes Frankenstein the first true science fiction story.

deathcomes4u

Even Isaac Asimov ain’t having none of your shit, not even posthumously.

velocigrey-deactivated20160825

You know what else was invented by women? Masked vigilantes, the precursor to the modern superhero. Baroness Emma Orczy wrote The Scarlet Pimpernel in 1905. The character would later inspire better known masked vigilantes such as Zorro and Batman.

geekinlibrariansclothing

Got that?

bettieleetwo

Stick that in your international pipe and smoke it

la-knight

I have literally been telling people this for over a year.

athenadark

the first extended prose piece - ie a novel, was not, as many male scholars will shout, Don Quixote (1605) but The Tale of Genji (1008) written by a woman

thepsychicclam

The first autobiography ever written in English is also attributed to a woman, The Book of Margery Kempe (1430s).

ladynorbert

The day may come when I find this post and do not reblog it, but it is not this day.

beardedmrbean

kureiois

sunanthrope

Your disability advocacy isn't worth shit if it doesn't extend to hoarders by the way. Those houses you see on the channels of people who clean hoarders' houses for free? PEOPLE, alive human beings, who deserve rights and respect just like every other human being, own those "filthy/disgusting" houses. If you can't extend your advocacy to those people you're not an advocate. Btw.

How the fuck do you think they're ever going to reach out for help if they see everybody all the time shitting on them for being "disgusting" or "lazy" for something that spiraled out of their control due to depression, or ocd, or not being able to clean, or not having anyone to clean, etc etc etc. Living in a hoarding situation doesn't make anyone a bad person or filthy or undeserving of basic respect and love.

doubleca5t

Kevin Durant is a extremely high tier shitposter who just so happens to also be one of the greatest basketball players of all time

resplendent-chungus

"Legacy points added/deducted" has permanently become a part of my vocabulary

btc-official-deactivated2024071

last week i woke up from one of the most fucked up nightmares ive ever had with that middle panel burned into my brain. like the exact wording and the exact apartment and the exact squidward. i feel like if i didnt make it real something bad wouldve happened. anyway todays upload is spunchbob comic oc

andhumanslovedstories

People in stories who get a dramatic phone call always hop in their cars and go “I’m two hours away. I’ll be there in one hour.” and then they are. It’s always half the time. It’s never, “I’m two hours away. I’ll be there in an hour and fifty minutes.” And sometimes it’s not even life or death! Love interest will be like, “what are we?” and suddenly some subaru is going 150 mph up the median on I-5. Everyone’s gonna fuckin throw tomatoes at me and hiss for my brave, controversial take, but I don’t think you should tokyo drift thru a school zone just so you can eat pussy sixty minutes ahead of schedule.

andhumanslovedstories

Also, “I’ll be there in half the time,” no you won’t. People also say this is real life, and i do not believe them. I believe they accomplished this one, have based all their travel estimates around this, are otherwise an absolute dickhead aggressively passing in the right hand lane, AND are probably not even en route to pussy

oneheadtoanother

tachyon-log

(USAmerican trying to imagine a societal environment) Okay, so picture a highway,

fishmech

inability to correctly perceive 3d objects is in fact far more dangerous when someone is driving a car next to you then when they're like, sending emails to you.

bunniope

can we focus on the gnome for a second

bunniope

wait sorry i was not wearing my glasses. that is a cat

ladyofspoons

these are the people i have to share a highway with

I love youtube off-grid/homesteading videos because they're always like "living the simple life" and then depict a life ten times more complicated than mine

Like I'm sure it's way more rewarding to grow and can your own tomatoes and they're probably healthier or whatever but is it simpler than me giving Coles one dollar to bring a much more safely canned can of tomatoes to my house? No. No it is not.

spark1eheartemoji

growing your own tomatoes is a fuck load more simple than having a job and keeping a job plus paying all the fees of living in society.

Most homesteaders still need to have a job and keep a job and pay all the fees of living in a society. There seem to be a lucky handful who have reduced their costs by homesteading (usually due to the free labour of friends and family) but there were easier ways to reduce those cost. In the vast majority of cases, homesteading is a lot more expensive than not homesteading. And where people are saving money, the amount of labour per dollar works out to well below minimum wage in savings.

From what I've seen, successful homesteaders do it because they find it rewarding. Rewarding does NOT mean simple.

rosstmcd

I can't speak to Australia, but at least in the US there is another group of homesteaders who are trying to live self-sufficiently off-grid because they expect the imminent total collapse of civilization, and they have fantasies of themselves living happily on home-grown produce while everyone else is killing each other for the last can of tomatoes at the store.

alex51324

Another thing about this subset of homesteaders* is that they are insistent--proud, even!--of doing things that are unsafe, and encouraging others to also do those things.

One example is canning dairy products (milk, butter, cheese). They'll show up in a canning group and say something like, "Look how I canned all this milk that the store was getting rid of this milk for 50 cents a gallon because it's the last day!"

Sane and responsible members of the group will say things like, "Dairy isn't safe for home canning; if you have fresh milk that you need to save for later, you can freeze it or make cheese!" And, "If you need shelf-stable milk you can buy powdered milk," or "You can dehydrate it at home, but you need a really good dehydrator, plenty of trays, and it takes forever; you're usually better off just buying it."

And then the person who just canned 20 quarts of botulism will start frothing at the mouth about how when the shit hits the fan--

And yeah, I'll grant that if grocery stores cease to exist, and you are entirely reliant for your winter survival on what you can put up during times of plenty, the risk-benefit analysis would be different. But in the actual world that we currently live in, it's false economy at best, and at worst a stupid flex that could end up killing somebody.

Anyway, TL;DR, "simple" often refers to an imagined past when the problems of modernity did not exist--yet somehow, the problems of that era have been left behind--which in turn is often a racist dogwhistle.

(*Besides their substantial overlap with weapons stockpilers/"militia" types.)

The Can/Dehydrate Absolutely Everything people baffle me. Most homesteaders (sensibly) have personal solar panels, because they want to live off-grid and still have electricity. When Shit Hits The Fan, their solar panels will not stop working. Their freezers would work fine. Canning or dehydrating or salting is great for certain foods (especially if you want to ferment, pickle or flavour something) but for so much stuff the best thing you can do to preserve nutrients and preserve it safely is chuck it in the freezer.

Freezers just aren't homesteady enough I guess.

reikiajakoiranruohoja

The simplest, but also the most immature, answer is that solar panels are 'cheating.' These people base their doomsday images on Fallout and zombie apocalypse movies. But not even on them but this lone wolf stereotype of a stereotype. If you can just create electricity from the sun, then it means you can bypass the gritty survival of eating canned goods and just live like you used to. And that kills the fantasy.

I haven't seen that kind, all the ones I've seen get solar panels as soon as they can afford them because living off generator power is expensive and sucks (and, unlike solar panels, would not serve you well in an apocalypse because you need to keep buying petrol for them). I don't think I've ever seen these anti-solar-panel homesteaders that you deal with. Variety in every community I suppose.

ineffectualdemon

Whenever I hear homesteaders and trad wife people talk about how much better it is to do your own canning I remember my grandmother telling me about the canning days from her childhood and how she would help her grandmother can fresh fruit (we lived in orchard country) in a hot canning shed built for that purpose for days at a time in the middle of summer

Specifically about how it was hell on fucking earth and how her grandmother fucking hated every single second of it

The moment her grandmother could buy canned fruit easily in the supermarket? Never fucking canned a thing herself again and was so relieved and grateful that she would never have to again

Canning as a hobby in your kitchen? I can see that being fun

Canning because you have a fuck ton of fresh fruit coming off of your trees and if you don't can it all NOW you won't have any fruit for winter and it's all you do from sun up to sun down in the middle of summer?

That isn't a cute fun rewarding time. It's hard fucking labour

flipchild

powerburial

picking the torture option and the next day the first thing he does right off the bat is make me eat a really big live spider

Tonight on My Husband Doesn’t Know How to Baby Talk

“Ma’am, are you aware that these, right here are your hands? They belong to you. And you get to decide what happens with them. So when you use these hands to pull your binky out of your mouth that is not necessarily a dad problem. I’ll fix it obviously i just want you to acknowledge it’s not my fault”

Husband: ma’am it has been reported lately that you do in fact have tiny little toes and a little button nose, do you care to comment?

Penny Rose: Babbles in Baby

Husband: RIVETING!

Penny Rose: Does that High Pitched Baby Yell ™️

Husband: Let it out friend! Feel your feelings!

Me: Hehehe silly husband doesn’t know how to do baby talk

All of tumblr collectively at my husband:

Penny Rose: does a sad baby scream

Husband: you don’t even have to understand taxes yet! I can explain them but you’ve got several years before that’s relevant!

Penny Rose: wide eyes, staring at her father, almost intrigued

Husband: I lied to you Penny your mother does our taxes. Do you want to know about arbitration? I know all about arbitration.

THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND

yes he just walks around the house and talks to her like this

Penny Rose: Cooing as twinkle twinkle little star plays

Husband: Now Penny there is a lot of misinformation out there in the world and I hate to tell you this but the moon is in fact not made of cheese. That is a conspiracy theory pushed by Big Dairy.

????

Husband: Holds Penny Rose up to her reflection in the microwave

Husband: you see Penny Rose! This was the M. Night Shyamalan twist! You were mirror baby all along!

FYI this is how you get a Deals Warlock if you were wondering

justplainsalty

I have follow up questions:

1) Did you participate in baby talk to make up for your husband's deficit, or did you also opt to speak to the Deals Warlock like a very tiny adult from babyhood?

1a) If you participated in baby talk with Penny, did she ever do any code switching with you while she was learning to talk (I mean, babyish talk back to you but fully formed adult like you share with us to Lawyer Dad)?

I didn't baby talk with her very much either! I think I squealed at her more than my husband did.

Something funny that has happened is that while she formally calls me Mama when she's answering me in passing she does call me "My Darling Love" and I don't know for sure but I think it's because I call her and her father "my loves" and her father calls me and her "darlings" and she's created a mash up 😂

So I'll say "okay penny it's time for bed" and I'll just hear "okay my darling love!" 😂