#actually disordered

[2neet4u]

the tumblr -> mastodon thing going on rn feels like my parents are getting divorced and they’re having a custody battle over jiraiblr

[cosmiccorvids]

This post is going to make a lot of disability "allies" angry and/or uncomfortable. I do not care.

Im so fucking tired of OCD being painted as "the cleaning disorder" and "everything must be so neat and tidy disorder" its not. its can be like that, sometimes. but just as often as OCD can cause (severely mentally and socially taxing) attention to being clean, often times it actually the opposite. and in my case, its severely the opposite. im sharing pictures because i don't know how to better explain to people that i can not walk on the floor of my room. i walk on top of old clothes and books and trash. I hope you realize this is an incredibly vulnerable thing for me to do.

I. can. not. walk. on. my. floor. i really cant show it any better. and yes, ive tried cleaning. ive tried cleaning with my meds. I've tried cleaning to music. ive tried throwing things away. every time it ends in me crying. that suitcase was last used 6 months ago, i still haven't unpacked it. that chick-fil-a bag has been there for over two years. why cant i throw it away? its full of worm on strings that i got as a joke and never tried to do anything with. those paint splotches on the floor are three years old. the last decent clean of my room was almost 6 months ago, and a lot of that mess was pushed under my bed. its still there. and if you understand why my room is like this, you can only imagine how long its been since ive washed my hair OCD isnt always clean. it isnt always neat or symmetrical or pretty often times its filthy, its sleeping in trash. it smells horrible, it doesn't let me be clean or perfect. it doesnt want to be clean OCD does not want to be clean. it wants everything to be correct. and often times, correct means leving old towels on the floor becuase it would be wrong to move them. I have more to say. im going to make more posts about our OCD. but for now, i am tired, and i feel like shit. so i am going to go wash my hands because that is the cleanest i know how to be

[lethroe]

Fuck it, I'm saying it.

Weight should not be part of the criteria for eating disorders as it only further perpetuates and enables the weight obsession. If someone with restrictive eating patterns doesnt get diagnosed with anorexia because of their weight, they may be more inclined to worsen their condition for validation. And the ultimate validation would be a diagnosis. Not to mention psychs can be fatphobic to people with EDs. I have a doctor that knows my disorder and still compares me to a BMI chart.

I believe eating disorders should be categorised on the obsession, fear of gaining weight, exercise/purging, and the eating behaviours exhibited. Not how successful they are at self harming to meet the beauty standard. It reinforces what we already know, that people are categorised, valued, and prioritised based on their looks.

- Sincerely an atypical anorexic

[tatdritt]

yeah I’m disabled but I’m not really disabled because I don’t have one of the bad disabilities. My disability is one of the lesser disabilities that isn’t actually a disability so clearly I’m not disabled at all I’m just uhhh uhhhhhh something else

[oshidorifuufu2]

i think im the shit at like 2am in the morning, i think im literal shit any other time

[bear-bait]

I’m not too sure if anyone’s clarified this on tumblr before, but I feel like it’s important to mention that you cannot curb the rituals a person with OCD does. You, as in the someone who isn’t experiencing it. And especially not by means of shaming (unfortunately even if it comes as a personal inconvenience).

I’m speaking for myself here, but rituals are usually done while the person is already in a state of distress, or close to one if they don’t preform it. Laughing at them, getting angry with them, guilt tripping them - it doesn’t help them quit these rituals, it just leads to them being more distressed about bothering you with something that is compulsive to them. Maybe even trying to circumvent that specific way of preforming the ritual by using a more dangerous method, or stressing about having to be sneaky about it. You can’t really personally know just how much you intruding on them can affect their state at the moment, not unless they tell you. And it can be quite a lot.

To kind of further clarify, I am talking about this for people with OCD that cannot access medical/professional help (which can be for multiple reasons), and not so much people that refuse to acknowledge that they have issues and do not care for the stress they cause you by refusing help/pushing their issues onto you (like a parent to their child).

If I’m wrong about anything here though, please feel free to correct. I’m just talking about my own experiences with it.

[blade-of-no-mercy]

Sometimes, I simply wish people would realize that while alters are a defining trait of CDDs that pwCDDs are traumatized people and have symptoms outside of the alters. Trance states, the somatic symptoms like joint pain and stomachaches and headaches. There is also the high comorbidity of eating disorders, personality disorders, and psychogenic non-epileptic seizures. Alters are something to deal with, sure. They're stressful. It can be messy with persecutors. It's not all bad, with alters, either. Sometimes it's warm and good, like all parts of life. I just wish people realized the hardship of these disorders rather than glorifying and aestheticizing what so many of us are going through.

(This post is now pro endogenesis. The sore loser who wrote it first can cry about it.)

[akechi-goro-lover]

hc that akechi in a future AU finally lets himself relax for once after a lot of therapy, only to find himself bed ridden for the next couple of months (years) due to the sheer amount of physical & emotional/mental stress he has been experiencing for his entire life that is now affecting him to the point where he is entirely and incredibly fatigued majority if not all of the day.