the people who responded “joe” and “biden” are operating a higher level than anyone else. they can see the matrix

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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

#extradirty

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
sheepfilms
NASA
we're not kids anymore.

ellievsbear
will byers stan first human second
almost home

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JBB: An Artblog!
RMH

@theartofmadeline
Misplaced Lens Cap
DEAR READER
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

Love Begins
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@luminouspaperclip
the people who responded “joe” and “biden” are operating a higher level than anyone else. they can see the matrix
dip shit you are not turning into the joker. you are barely even turning into the penguin or th e ice guy
in a world that idolises female suffering and selflessness, have some standards and don't settle for less then you like. it'll piss off way more people you expected, but it's so, so important
We need to be at least a little selfish
Important rules for the "age verification" era of the internet that we're living in:
1. Do not do age verification.
2. If you have to do age verification, cheat. Do not under any circumstances give them your real ID.
ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs
after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?
i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out
You turn on the radio one morning to find another one of those Rap songs where every 4th word is a swear. Naturally the Radio bleeps it out, but you realize that it sounds familiar. You realize that the rappers are speaking in Morse code.
Your eyes widen as you swerve over onto the shoulder of the expressway, nearly hitting a Jeep Cherokee in the process. It didn’t matter to you. Frantically searching the glove compartment, the backseat, and your purse, you finally find a small notepad and a pen with a low ink cartridge. You listen closely to the radio, and begin to scribble down as much as you can. You realize it was merely a pattern.
— -. . / - .– — / - .– — / ..-. .. ..-. - -.–
Unfortunately for you, you aren’t very well versed in translating Morse code, merely recognizing it. You reach into your purse to grab your phone, but after a moment of searching, you realize you had left it at home before you left for work. “God damnit,” you mutter. You’re more than halfway to your office, and you’re already running late due to the fact that that you decided to follow some whim and jot down some cryptic message from a provocative rapper. Concluding that it would probably be best for you to mosey to work, you pull back onto the expressway and try to make it to work on time.
Upon arriving at work, you ask any coworker in sight if they know Morse code. Nobody seems to, and some don’t even know what Morse code is. You slump your shoulders in disappointment and head over to your desk, when suddenly, the quiet, mouse-like secretary clears her throat and says, “Excuse me, I know Morse code!”
You turn around with the same wide eyes as before. “You do!?” you ask vigorous excitement, which seems to startle the young woman.
“Yes,” she says, “when I was younger, I planned on joining the navy, so I taught it to myself.” You feel a bit sorry for her, that she wound up as a mere secretary instead of a naval officer, but that feeling of pity didn’t stop you from being grateful for the lucky coincidence of her knowing Morse code. You show her the pattern.
— -. . / - .– — / - .– — / ..-. .. ..-. - -.–
“That’s all there is?” she asks, furrowing her brow.
“Yeah,” you shrugged, “it just kept repeating that over and over again. What does it say?”
“One, two, two, fifty.”
Your heart sinks a little. “What is that? What does that mean, is it like a phone number or house address or something?”
The secretary shrugs. “I’m really sorry, I don’t know. It’s too short to be a phone number, but beyond deciphering it, I’m afraid I can’t help you.”
You nod slowly, and though you understand, you are still not at all satisfied. You go to sit at your desk. 1 2 2 50. The sequence plays over and over in your head all day, and needless to say, your curiosity an wonderment got the best of you. It was not a very productive work day.
You head home, and the same damned song plays on the radio. You shake your head as if that would make the song stop, then decide to plug 12250 into your GPS to see if there are any autofill results. None. You become increasingly frustrated.
When you get home, your daughter is sitting at the kitchen table, working on homework. She runs up to you and gives you a big hug, and asks about your day at work. You put on a fake smile and sigh. “Interesting,” you say— no doubt sugarcoating the intense excitement, disappointment, and confusion.
“Will you help me with my homework? I have to memorize something for my history class tomorrow.”
“Of course, doll! What are you memorizing?”
She hands you a laminated sheet of paper. “Roman numerals!”
You glance over the page, your eyes quickly darting from one, to two, to fifty.
It dawns on you. You’d recognize this pattern anywhere.
I II II L
Go to hell
Fascinated by everyone's but especially American's desire to give medieval keeps, especially in colder regions, central heating (and I think Winterfell is to blame for this trope, where, to it's defence, the hot springs were not a matter of comfort but survival wrt the deadly fantasy Winter that's not real irl), because I'm always like. okay I know they told you in middle grade that castles were all cold and drafty but like ... no also what
There's generally going to be rooms dedicated to and build for warmth, the living quarters, both for nobles and their servants. This will be the central living tower, or parts of it called a Kemenate (literally 'room with a stove'), the great hall and work spaces around the kitchen. You can put the Kemenate on top of the hall to catch the big fires' and daily living's heat through the wooden floor, but you often can't put wooden stuff on top of the kitchens (that's a fire risk). If you have the money and space, you build a whole separate comfy place for living because you don't have to stay in the most defensible part of the castle all the time. These separate living buildings are also called Kemenate and are often build from wood, cob, brick etc.
People used to wear much more clothes indoors, including while sleeping, and those clothes were much thicker and sturdier than what we largely wear today. Every time you think of how cold those stone walls are, think about everyone wearing a linen shift + two-ish layers of wool on all body parts except hands and head + stockings and shoes + some kind of head-covering. In Ye Old Middle Ages, women are probably wearing a wimple, which is kind of like a modern Hijab in terms of coverage. People wear shifts, socks, and a head-covering to bed.
I think people used to radiators also really underestimate how much a large open fire/tiled stove heats up a room. Also, middle and northern Europe (as well as parts of Northern China) had and to this day have beds and benches build into tiled and cob stoves. Those fuck.
Beds are enclosed so you stay warm in them, either by curtains, in wall niches or with wood. There's also a type of bed that's inside a chest (like a coffin) so you can stuff your stuff inside during the day and put down the lid to use it as a bench. That's also another reason for people to always sleep in groups. Depending on the era, one of the jobs of a lady's maid or a retainer might literally be warming their master's bed. In early times and among servants, people also sleep in large groups in rooms together in general even outside a farming context, often with animals like pet dogs, too, which further warms everything up.
Walls are not bare, cold stone, but covered with a layer of plaster or cob, tiles or wooden panels, sometimes layered, and believe me, this makes such a difference. Source: I lived in a Ye Olde German Farmhouse with 70 cm thick stone walls and flag stone floor and all that converted to modern flats for a while.
On top of that you hang tapestries on the wall, which are not like modern printed cloth but basically wall rugs, sometimes several inches thick, and rugs or rushes (like a light cover of hay) on the floor on top of stone, tile, wooden panelling or a cob floor cover that goes over the heave flag stone. Pillows and blankets on all sitting surfaces, often on top of panelling (in the case of benches build into the stone). The roof of a room is also tiled, panelled or plastered. Upper stories will generally have wooden floors. Stories in a tower heat each other upwards, so the nicer rooms are further up.
The inner stone walls of a castle, even if stone and very thick, will heat up a few degrees in comparison to the outside walls if the castle is continually heated/lived in, and also trap heat inside, and this will make a difference. Inner walls might also be thinner and made of wood, cob or brick. You're defending against the outside, after all.
You put stuff in the windows. Holy shit. Screens of wood, horn, cloth or leather/hide, often treated for extra insulation. Why are these fantasy castles all so drafty.
Like, idk, I know Americans especially can't pop down to their nearby castle museum to have a look around, but even with people who can and do: The castles you'll see, even the ones who aren't 'ruined' are ruins. They're stripped down. I remember touring Norman towers in England, and those places do look dire and are cold because even if they're still standing, they're ruins. It makes such a difference to get to look at a castle that is still lived in, has been inhabited until recently, or has been historically restored where these amenities are preserved. The exact amenities will depend on the era, of course, but they'll be there. The publicly accessible parts of Burg Eltz are a great example to google, especially since I promise you, you have seen this specific castle before. They have pictures on their English language website here, and the German National Geographic has a few further inside pictures here. Seeing a place like that that isn't a ruin with bare, stripped walls, nothing in the windows, no decorations and furniture etc. makes you realise that yeah actually. My characters are probably just gonna go grab a pillow if their ass is cold on the window's stone bench. Blankets are a pretty old technology, humans (elves, dwarves, whatever) can figure that one out.
Trump won because he’s the first president to ever understand that pro wrestling is real.
It’s not a shitpost! And you hit every point dead on!
So no one is going to tell me that they made looking for alaska into a miniseries in 2019????????? I'm so watching this after Merlin. I haven't read John Green in years and this is going to be cringy and amazing
If you want to hide a terrible secret from the world, hire Hulu's marketing team, because they didn't tell a soul about looking for alaska.
Girl who thinks she's having a normal and innocuous conversation with another woman entirely unaware that to all outside observes she occupies a panel framed with extremely conspicuous amounts of lily flowers
animated lesbians making out as a follower milestone on bluesky. enjoy 💋💋
this is an ongoing casual narrative now! click here for the next story beat ❤️🖤
We need more ships where it's romantic for one half and platonic for the other and both parties are aware and ok with this
this is me and my partner and I am not even fucking joking. this is attainable. you can have this. you can have someone who loves you a little differently than you love them and you're both okay with it and it doesn't end anything. there should be ships like this because it does in fact happen in real life and you cant say it doesn't
Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.
The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there
Regular bears tell stories of angel bears sent by the Bear God, pure white and twice as strong as any normal bear could be, who rule the summit of the Earth and kill all who stand in their path.
And they are right, those bears exist and totally do that. Humans just have fake angels as a cope.
love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears
No more waiting, no more debating, go get your hrt. "I don't know if I'm really trans!" You are. Now go. "I'm scared!" We all were. Now go. "There's a long wait to be seen!" Go get your name on the list then. DIY if you need. "What if my friends don't accept me?" They weren't really your friends. Now go. "What if my spouse doesn't accept me?" Get a divorce. Now go. You do not need to continue to live in agony and depression to pretend to be someone else. Go get your hrt.
The original incarnation of this post inspired SO MANY people to start hrt! I cannot help resolve every situation specifically, but most people can absolutely accomplish this step! If you want hrt GET IT
girls? kissing girls? how novel! /j
It’s the new hotness!
2008, and I'm getting ready for my government job fresh out of college. There's a suddenly bright light as a tear in space appears, and a bright haired female version of myself steps through it.
"Foone! I have an important message, from your future self!"
"oh wow, is it that I'm a girl and need to transition immediately?"
"no, you'll figure that out yourself. This is more important"
She steps closer and takes my face into her hands.
"never read homestuck for a boy you have a crush on. Farewell!"
There's another flash and a momentary smell of ozone, and I'm alone in my apartment again, more confused than ever.
A couple people have reblogged this with tags like "what about for a girl?" so let me be clear by quoting my beloved grandpa, may he rest in peace:
Always do what a cute girl tells you to do.
i wish you guys could hear the noises i'm making. what the fuck is that thang