thje personifiCATion of the officalverse

i have corvid she/her

[offical-offical]

WHATS UP BITHCES

[offical-offical]

all life is suffering

[offical-offical]

if i just make random posts people will love me yes

[the-infant-from-that-night]

I will make it so

[offical-offical]

if i just make random posts people will love me yes

[offical-offical]

satan posts 60 times per day?? i gotta get on the grind fr

[mean-girl-offical]

2026 is in 3 months

Hope this ruined ur day<333

[amnesia-offical]

I think you made a typo :) It should be “2025 is in 3 months”

[offical-offical]

something is very wrong here

[tothechaos]

glad that im not popular enough to have an evil shadow version of my blog that exists just to make contradictions on my posts

[totheorder]

:)

[tothechaos]

[tothechaos]

Do Not Do This To Me

[catboybeebop]

[slicedcheesegremlin]

[tothechaos]

if this post hits 200k im printing it out and eating it

[pointless-achievements]

Achievement Unlocked:

Daily Recommended Dose of Fiber

Make an ill-advised promise within earshot of a gimmick blog.

[rotary-supercollider]

Quick someone add a fucked-up car so we can get @identifying-cars-in-posts

[mysteryviolencesideblog3000]

Ok!

[identifying-cars-in-posts]

1976-1977 Oldsmobile Cutlass

[terminusverge]

That car is not messed up enough. Here.

@identifying-cars-in-posts

[identifying-cars-in-posts]

1981-1983 Delorean DMC-12

[cantotallyeven]

I'll write a hauiku as a comment on this post and hope the bot sees

[the-haiku-bot]

I’ll write a hauiku

as a comment on this post

and hope the bot sees

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[absurdly-useful]

@identifying-horses-in-posts

[identifying-horses-in-posts]

Pretty horse!

[therainbowgorilla]

@i-say-ok

[i-say-ok]

ok.

[goosemoosse]

@cat-spotted

[cat-spotted]

CAT SPOTTED!!☆ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

[kittybroker]

Fine kitty appearing during our time of need! This Delightful beast only appears once every 1000 years for the small price of $2.50!

[idontrateyourposts]

/200K

[free-post-store]

$0

[yronnia]

I choose @weirdly-specific-but-ok ! And it's effective!

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

the second i saw someone chose me for something i felt deep irrational fear. what eldritch demon is this site sacrificing me to now?

oh are we eating paper is that a thing because i am down baby

[nastasya--filippovna]

If someone asks what Tumblr is, show them this thread.

@turtleneck-crowley @ivankaramazov07 isn't this magic. :D :D ;D

[ivankaramazov07-deactivated2024]

TUMBLR IS HUMAN CULTURE AT ITS FINEST I TELL YOU THE DOCTOR WOULD BE PROUD TO SEE US IDIOTS. IVE SHENANID-ONCE, ILL SHENAN-AGAIN

to all those who got the ducktales reference, i send my love and kisses

[probablyadhdapparently]

I’m turning this into a picrew chain also guys lots of pressure

Nuggts character maker!

This is a Picrew made by Nuggts @.nuggts on TikTok You can use this Picrew as a profile picture or in a video etc. with credits! Do

Do it or the animatronics fucking get me also no I did not kill anyone what are you talking about

tags: @biscuits-lovely-corner @expresso4thedeppresso @funkingrn @aroacesigma @lastdivantruther @barracuda677 @pengumi12 @sulkystella @misschuchuw @someonebeatmetotheseusernames @blinksager @sav3yee @chuuyasboner @ur-local-remy-kinnie @urazayt @thelittleprinceconfirmed @gherkin-saute @vinylbiohazard @amioddlyart

tag all you moots this is not an option

also prev yes you @ivankaramazov07 I want you to do it as well

[ivankaramazov07-deactivated2024]

@probablyautism thnx for remembering the weirdest tumblrina on the planet. also can u explain to ur local grandma what she has to do(apologies are afoot)

[probablyadhdapparently]

So tap on the link above my character and simply make your own it could be an OC or you or your sona, anything.

[ivankaramazov07-deactivated2024]

ON IT BESTIE!

[mystic-mae]

im here watching this lmao, funniest shit i seen

[ivankaramazov07-deactivated2024]

NOT THE KILGRAVE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

oh and @probablyautism here u go luv

CMON FOLKS

DO IT

[mystic-mae]

here you are!!

[ivankaramazov07-deactivated2024]

@mystic-mae IM IN LOVE WITH YOUR PICREW!!!!!! beautiful business.

[falling-raine]

@weirdly-specific-but-ok @styx142 no pressue :)

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Wild how I keep returning to this goddamn post. @queermarzipan ball's in your court babe.

[neil-gaiman]

It may still need help getting to 200,000.

Here's Aziraphale in disguise:

And here's a backstage shot of the Gentlemen in 1941 suits:

[badjokesbyjeff]

@tothechaos will you print and eat the entire post? If so, here is a long joke. Don't choke:

A man obsessed with trains finally steals one and immediately crashes it, killing several people.

At the trial, the man is found guilty of multiple murders and sentenced to death.

Before he faces his sentence, he’s offered a last meal, and asks for a single banana, which is given to him.

The next day, he’s led to the electric chair. They strap him in, pull the switch, and... nothing happens.

There’s never been a failure before. But because you cannot punish a person twice for the same crime, the court is forced to let him go free.

Within a week’s time, naturally, the man, who is obsessed with trains, goes and steals another one.

He doesn’t care that he can’t drive it or that he failed catastrophically before; he is obsessed with trains and his only desire is to operate one. As before, he crashes it, and kills several people.

Again, he stands trial, and again, he is sentenced to death, showing no remorse, only delight that he got to operate the train.

His last meal request is a single banana. When he goes to the chair, the executioner pulls the switch, but nothing happens. He goes free again.

The train-obsessed maniac, once more on the loose, wastes no time in hijacking a train and crashing it.

His trial is speedy, because this has already happened twice, and he is sentenced to death.

They ask him what he’d like for his last meal. “A single banana,” he says.

“Oh, no you don’t, you son of a bitch. We’re on to you, now. We know all about your little banana trick, and you’re not escaping this time!”

The guards refuse his request, and instead serve him a standard last meal of steak, potatoes, and berry cobbler.

The next morning they strap him into the electric chair, pull the switch, and... nothing happens.

“Did you give him the banana?” demands the head guard.

“No, sir! He asked for the banana but we didn’t give it to him, we swear!” says one of the guards.

Turns out the banana had nothing to do with anything. He was just a really bad conductor.

[violet-the-red-panda-deactivate]

JEFF, CHANGE YOUR FUCKING URL

[forlayina]

@writing-prompt-s

[writing-prompt-s]

Quick! Gordon Ramsey has tasked you to come up with a new recipe with a rather special ingredient: 'this trainwreck of a Tumblr post printed out on paper'. You don't have much time as the exquisite guest will enter the doors of your fancy establishment the moment this post hits 200k notes. Come up with a recipe. Please provide detailed instructions.

[shaevilux]

Chaos Course Set Meal

Bespoke 9 course meal meant to be enjoyed by @tothechaos

Foreword:

As tasked by the prolific Gordan Ramsey, this 9 Course endeavour will feature the post in its entirety segmented into 9 delightfully ornate, unreasonably complex yet delectably unparalleled dishes. In the following, we'll see how to prepare each of these dishes.

Course One

Dish name: 10k notes of Hubris

10k Notes of Hubris is a simple risotto with saffron infusion and forest mushrooms, topped with shavings of the top 9th piece of this post, printed in full colour, regular stock. Due to the nature of a 9 course setting, it is wise to start with a simpler dish.

Ingredients (serves four people):

1 teaspoon of saffron

300g carnaroli rice

50g extra virgin olive oil

20g butter

5g shallots

1l vegetable broth

parsley (to taste)

100g porcini mushrooms

80g portobello mushrooms

100g brown mushrooms

5g truffle oil

5g lemon peel and lemon juice

30g parmesan cheese

thyme (a dash)

5g garlic

A pinch of salt and pepper

The first 9th of this post, printed in full colour with regular stock.

Method:

In a saucepan, pour the oil and the chopped shallot(s), then add the rice and saffron and toast

Pour the broth a little at a time and cook slowly. Allow to cook before adding salt and black pepper. Stir in butter, grated parmesan cheese, chopped parsley, truffle oil, lemon juice and peel.

In a separate saucepan, cook the mushrooms with oil, garlic, thyme, salt and black pepper.

Presentation:

At the base of the dish pour the risotto, complete with forest mushrooms and basil leaves. Shave the printed top 9th of the post and sprinkle on top. Drizzle a dash of olive oil before serving.

The next dish and recipe of this 9 course meal, complete with the next 9th of the post printed and incorporated, will be presented by another chef.

[badjokesbyjeff]

@one-time-i-dreamt @i-am-a-fish @pukicho

[i-am-a-fish]

hi jeff (:

[writing-prompt-s]

I just texted @one-time-i-dreamt

[dominyk9]

i don't what's more wild to me, how much we are all working on giving someone ink poisoning or learning that @writing-prompt-s has @one-time-i-dreamt 's phone number

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I have been summoned many, many times

[whoviankendokaqueenbeewithbooks]

This post is already one of the most epic I have ever seen. Keep going!

[notmikesblog]

The tumblr post equivalent of the fall of ceasar. Well can't miss my turn with the knife.

[totally-cis-offical]

Time for the officalverse

@satan-offical @trans-official @sometimes-cis-offical @tiresias-offical @jeff-offical @spotify-offical @beehive-offical @sleep-offical

And any others

[nonsense-offical]

This is interesting. Hey, family check this out!!1!

@the-void-offical @shadow-dimension-offical @nothing-offical @nonexistent-offical @nowhere-offical @no-one-offical @deactived-offical @child-offical @never-offical @the-listener-offical @the-yapper-offical

[temu-offical]

this is peak comedy

@thing-offical @possum-offical @pink-caterpillar-face-offical (boo) @perimedes-official, @revenge-offical, @phantom-scares, @always-being-watched-official, @ai-offical, @perikles-offical, @breadteleporter-offical, @period-offical, @random-citizen-offical, @pencil-sharpener-offical @rat-on-cocaine-offical

[random-citizen-offical]

@lime-offical @lemon-offical @britain-offical @autism-offical @adhd-offical

@i-like-reblog-maps

Me if I ever had to give something a scientific name.

[i-like-reblog-maps]

am— am i honorary officalverse now?? cool if so

anyways here’s the first 10k-ish reblogs of this post’s map

[lavaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

200k hit already but i wanted to contribute something

TAG GAME: PUT UR FAVORITE PICTURE OF UR BLORBO FROM UR CAMERA ROLL/nf

@sondheim-girly @forgthetheaterkid @afterl1ghtwastaken @achillesk1sser @justalunaticfangirl +anyone who wants

[i-like-reblog-maps]

this man.. brainworms, i tell you,,, he’s somehow been a special interest character of mine for. at least a few years. this frame specifically though. why is that manic grin so damn cute. his face is literally splitting apart at his seams it should not be cute

[miata-detector]

ahh there might be a miata but its a pretty long post so im not sure 😅

[ed-official]

?

[satan-offical]

One day one of my posts will end up on @hellsite-hall-of-fame and I can die happily. If not I will find who ever runs that account and personally put them in my penis explosion chamber with Charlie Kirk and Hitler. Mark my fucking words bitches

[offical-offical]

shitposting is harder than you'd think

[vincealinthagus]

Why am I JUST NOW discovering the officalverse. It’s so fucking stupid I’m in love

[unluckycryptid]

‘What It Sounds Like’ is never actually officially released. only the fans that were there at Namsan Tower remember Huntrix performing it but it isnt ever recorded and, for a while, is rarer media than ‘Takedown’.

To Huntrix ‘What it Sounds Like’ is personal. Yes they used it to defeat Gwi-Ma, save everyone’s souls and construct the new Honmoon, but it was a confession of their imperfections, a reminder of a sacrifice, and a promise for a new tomorrow.

(It’s not like they sat down and wrote it before they performed it anyway. And going back to reconstruct their emotions behind the performance and the musical backing that had been gifted to them by their new Honmoon—it felt artificial. Not genuine to everything that happened that night.)

It’s not until a particular night on tour when, for some reason, Huntrix hits a high, a peak. Maybe it’s from the crowd, maybe they discovered something more about themselves. Emotions become so raw and vulnerable and overwhelming that their final song isn’t enough. So. They start singing from their hearts.

(The fans hear the fabled song from Namsan Tower, which had never been recorded. The tech crew is trying to figure out where the music is coming from. And the Honmoon, shimmers just enough that it becomes briefly visible to everyone in attendance.)

From then on performances of ‘What It Sounds Like’ by Huntrix are still exceedingly rare. But on those nights when the energy is just right between the girls and their fans, when Rumi starts singing acapella for those few seconds, everyone knows that that night in particular has been deemed special. Unforgettable to all who got to witness it.

[ur-least-fav-gal-offical]

#officalverse is top 10 in trending btw, wow, to think im a core member of the officalverse (one of the og i should say, kinda)

[offical-offical]

YOO CHAT WE WIN THESE

[likeadevils]

so i have a mildly popular “reblog and put in in the tags” post going around and its. very clear how many people don’t know how to interact with a tumblr post

so, first of all, tumblr’s culture has changed a lot in the past couple years. there’s a genuine community effort to not start any drama, and ironically a lot of the current hostility is an effort to keep things calm. there’s also a change in how people interact with posts, so if you haven’t been here in a while please skip down to the tags/replies/reblog with text section.

for newcomers: you should be reblogging posts about as liberally as you would like something on twitter. if you only like stuff, people will think you are rude/a bot. you’ve probably heard people talk about “cultivating your dash,” and thats because this platform is 100% centered around your dashboard. trending matters less, unfollowing and blocking in order to shape your dash into it’s best form is widely accepted, the majority of the content you’ll find and interact with will be because of your dash, and the only way to put things on your dash is to reblog them. tumblr users are deeply distrustful of algorithms and have largely turned off the “see posts your friends have liked” function (i recommend you also turn of the various algorithms in settings → general settings → dashboard preferences).

so, once you’ve reblogged a post, there’s three ways to add content to it. the tags, replies, and reblogging with text. all of them have different connotations

the tags: an inside voice. originally they were meant for organizing your blog (and they’re still used for this), but they’ve also morphed into a way to share thoughts that aren’t funny/insightful enough for non-followers to be interested in. when in doubt, put your comment in the tags

replies: basically talking to your friends in class. your followers have no way of finding your replies (they don’t pop up on the dash, nobody gets notified except for the original poster) so chances are, only the person who made the post is gonna see your comment. it’s for quick one-offs that you’re okay with other people overhearing, but really is only made for one person. they’re like a public dm

reblog with text: an outside voice. you’re getting up on a stage in town square and entertaining people. make sure it’s funny or insightful— bottom line, add something new to the conversation. you should use this the least

general rules of thumb: 

when in doubt, reblog. people will judge you if your blog is only personal posts and you only interact with other content by liking it.  

the only things people will judge you for reblogging are personal vent posts. leave a like to give a little virtual hug

if a post is asking about your personality/opinions (i.e: tell me what’s the last tv show you watched, that kind of thing) put it in the tags 

also if you see a nice edit, gifset, or art, reblog and say something nice in the tags! it’s that nice sweet spot of common enough that no one will notice but uncommon enough to make the artist’s day

[dovewithscales]

Finally real advice for new users. This is a solid guide for how to make the transition from Twitter to Tumblr.

In particular, artists need you to reblog. A reblog helps them get seen. A like doesn’t help them at all.

[mikubilliards]

Oh boy lookie what I found here

[mean-girl-offical]

Moots, istg ig im white I’ll delete tumblr

[helpmemiku]

yellow teal and black

[mean-girl-offical]

Yayayayyaya I love sharing deagth stenches

[ur-least-fav-gal-offical]

yeah yellow, wbm

[hater-offical]

Green and white.

[ur-least-fav-gal-offical]

you aim to distroy me? what an honour, u wont destroy me tho, yall dont know what im capable of

[offical-offical]

light blue

[offical-offical]

Being a small offical is so weird. I get mentions more often than I get actual notes

[half-empty-coffee-cup-offical]

As one of the, if not the, newest offical, I feel this. Also, nobody really knows I exist. 😅

[offical-offical]

i'm not even that new ! im pretty old ! but no one cares abt me :(

hey ... u wanna be friends ?

[offical-offical]

Being a small offical is so weird. I get mentions more often than I get actual notes