@hell-nether - Tumblr Blog

this website’s easy watch. *dangles a bunch of greek gods like keys*

i know what i’m doing dw

Keep in mind I only know like. Two Greek gods by name. Homer is one of them, and he was good friends with Odysseus I think?

Wait fuck Homer isn’t a god he wrote the fucking thing. Fuck

POST CANCELLED NO ONE LOOK

desperately google searching for “greek gods to pray to when people notice your online idiocy”

pluto-officially

You're failing.

You don’t think I know that, God of Death? Can I pray to you so I can DIE ALREADY

communist-mannyfesto

Pluto is Roman, not Greek

?????

enigma-system03

Short version is that Pluto is a later name for the god of death, which is often associated with the Roman era/Roman mythology. Hades is the earlier name.

I set up my own house made of sticks and it has promptly fallen on me

HE’S NOT EVEN REAL?????*

I made this post thinking I knew what kind of fire I was playing with. Hephaestus, God of Fire, looking upon me from his fuck off tower or whatever said “Oh you think you know? Check this shit” and promptly set my post ablaze for everyone to observe

legionoftuna

Hephaestus doesn't have a tower, he lived in a volcano

FINE THEN. BIG FUCK OFF VOLCANO. WHATEVER

wrong.

pointless-achievements

Achievement Unlocked:

Lightning Bait

You're basically doing the post equivalent of standing out in a field during a storm with a ten-foot copper pole, you better hope Zeus is busy hiding from Hera.

FUCK'S SAKE NOT AGAIN

taco-bee

I need you to name every greek God you know and what they are for plz

For science

OKAY FINE HERE'S WHAT I'VE FOUND

HERMES: DA FUNNY ONE

ZEUS: DA LIGHTNING (NOTE: THOUGHT HE WAS NORDIC, FATHER OF THOR)

POSEIDON: DA SEA ONE

HEPHAESTUS: DA FIRE/FORGING/STEEL ONE

APHRODITE: DA HOT ONE

KRATOS: GOD OF WAR

HADES: DA HELL ONE. ROGUE LIKE

APOLLO: DA DODGEBALL/PROPHECY ONE

boxxed-juice

ares is the god of war, not kratos

WHY THE FUCK DOES THE GAME CALL HIM GOD OF WAR THEN

ironwoman359

I can't believe this post is less than 24 hours old, it feels like something out of classic tumblr lore

bingle-official

op god of war is not official greek mythology lmao

reekill-playlists

Someone needs to read a Percy Jackson book

reekill-playlists

hey is this still post of the year or

zelly-fangirl

how's the hole op? want some snacks? a blanket? a shovel to dig yourself out?

I'D LIKE OUT NOW I THINK

beehivemind200

And the post of the year goes to.....

YOU

behindnightmaresanddreams

here is me holding my trophy for tumblr post of the year. i'd like to thank no one in particular but i would like to unthank everyone who decided this one in particular was post of the year. i will never let this down ever

I remember this post dropping, what a great day. OP I hope you know this was the highlight of my week when it dropped, it was so good.

bucketofdeltav

So my beta reader for the Big Fics is an astrophysicist, right. Who is currently also writing a hard sci-fi novel about the exploration of Phobos (more power to them, I cannot with the physics required for that, best I can do is soft sci-fi/fantasy and that reminds me I should finish that story).

Anyway I was bitching about how hard it is to come up with feasible planets in Star Wars because sometimes you need a new planet from scratch and sometimes you need to know more about a planet than the 'has jungles, is probably a moon technically' than Wookieepedia will give you, and they're like 'oh yeah I can do something about that'.

So they've written (in Matlab but they swear it will run as a .exe as well and I may be conscripted to embed it as a web tool at some point) a star system generator.

You input what you know about the planet (ecosystem, population, sun colour, does it have liquid water, does it have a moon or moons, is it a moon or moons, temperature averages, atmosphere, you get me) and it will give you the... everything else about the star system, in obedience to real-universe physics. And if you input nothing you get a randomly generated star system.

And I’m like oh I know people who will be into this with a vengeance, and they're not on Tumblr, so this is me seeing who exactly would be keen on, and I cannot stress this enough, a real-physics comprehensive star system generator.

It's still in the debugging phase (last error fixed: every planet wants to have a population of exactly 5000 regardless of other factors, turned out to be a missing equals sign somewhere), but I'm psyched for this and trying to gauge interest for how high a priority 'make this an accessible web tool' needs to be.

melyzard

elodieunderglass

@bucketofdeltav says the URL is here: http://tumblr.com/star-system-generator

Follow @star-system-generator and get more of the good stuff by joining Tumblr today. Dive in!

lipstickchainsaw

When you're unable to solve an IT problem at work, there really is nothing quite like having it escalated all the way up the ladder. With every step, there is a degree of smugness about how real my problem is, and that yes, I was right to have trouble with this.

crowns-of-violets-and-roses

You can get a minor version of this if one IT person solves it but they spend a bunch of time repeating things you’ve already tried and when they eventually solve it it’s by doing something you wanted to try but didn’t have the requisite permissions to do

coral-skeleton

Was in a situation where neither I, nor my boss knew what was causing the problem, so we ended up calling one of the head engineers, and ive never experienced anything quite as validating as the moment where said head engineer, after spending several minutes just staring at the problem, quietly said "what the fuck"

sorrelchestnut

My finest moment of technical triumph was sending an error ticket to a vendor, then quietly troubleshooting it on my end, and then sending them what I thought the solution was likely to be. They disagreed. SIX MONTHS LATER, they came back with the fix and it was exactly what I said it would be originally. I have never and likely will never capture that high again but by god was it sweet.

sapphicseance

mom said it's my turn to hand out the ominous and vague warnings

solarsyrup

that wasn’t mom

lavender-lily

they JUST SAID it was their turn

nealashitposts

I recently found out why my mom would never sleep around me when I was a kid. Like she’d never let herself take naps or sleep if I was awake, ever. Or if she did, she would lock her bedroom door. So when I was 6, I was asleep in my bed in the middle of the night when I hear a loud bang, like a pot being dropped and come out to the living room to see my mom standing by the window, with just a huge pile of spaghetti all over the sill, and a pot on the ground, and I ’m like “Are you gonna eat all that?” And ya’ll she get’s BIG MAD and yells at me and chases me to my room but then a little while later a bunch of cops show up and ask me a bunch of random ass questions about my art? Like this one cop lady keeps asking me to draw dragons for her?! And they seem mad as hell

I didn’t want to get arrested so I just never asked my mom for spaghettis after that. Lesson, learned. Don’t ask mom for spaghettis or she’ll call the damn police on you.

So I have this memory in my head, and it goes unquestioned until I say it outload for the first time a few months back and as soon as I say the words “When I was six, my mom called the cops on me for asking for spaghettis” My adult logic slams into place and is like “Hang on. Your mother definatly did not call the police on a 6 year old for asking for spaghetti.”

So obviously that’s not what really went down. I call up my mom to tell her how I remember it and on top of her figuring out why her kid has always been really cagey around spaghettis for the last 3 decades she tells me what really happened.

So on that night, a man tried to break into our house through the front window. It was just my mom, and her kids so she did what she felt she had too and shot him in the head. He’d been wearing a helmet, which landed on the floor under the window.

Now I just want ya’ll to put yourselves in my moms shoes for a minute here. This woman has just taken a human life. The trauma of that- the instant agony, the panic, the guilt, the fear- all of it hitting her at once, her only solace the knowledge that her children are safe. She protected her daughters. No matter the cost to her soul- her children are safe.

Then she looks up and sees her six year old staring at the inside of this mans head before saying “Are you gonna eat all that?”

nealashitposts

I suspect they were trying to keep me busy and distracted while they cleaned up the corpse in the living room?!?

nealashitposts

someone said tumblr nuked this post, but I could never be so lucky.

suiheisen

i watch baseball for the side quests

dappergamelord

throwback to 2021 when the exact same player started doing this extended water bottle bincoculars sight gag in the dugout

stuckinnet

this is the same guy who also made himself a fruit cocktail midgame. he is The manic pixie dream girl

warriornunnery

baseball is actually not a sport it’s just a documentary of human nature and how we battle boredom. the stuff these teams get up to while they’re waiting their turn.

and it’s hilarious when they pull pranks on each other, like attaching things to other people’s caps:

or the beloved hot foot prank:

or when they decided to put a guy’s pants over his head and make it seem like he was walking on his hands:

or when they opposing pitchers took turns playing tic tac toe every time they got on the mound:

yokowan

i take back everything bad i've ever said about baseball these boys can fucking Post

randomthunk

Sometimes you have to entertain yourself out in the field too, like the time Victor Robles made friends with a praying mantis.

warriornunnery

and some college baseball shenanigans

sm64mario

can we'a skip the impeachment and just shoot him in the head

sm64mario

AND NOT MISS

dct239394cvvd098dffgggp

to this day i cannot BELIEVE aang called up and blew off like nine avatars just because they didnt offer any vegan options to ending the war

pikameme-dayo

roku: my best friend assaulted me as a senior citizen :(

kyoshi: sometimes some murder is OK

kuruk: just punch people that disagree with you

aang: okay i’m starting to think that none of you took this avatar thing seriously

teeveew

You're not wrong

aboutiroh

Aang when he is told he’s the Avatar at age 12: *has a melt down because he understands the seriousness of this function and the consequences his new responsibilities will have on his personal life*

other Avatars at age 16: I’m the avatar? Cool! Hey look it comes with a glowing eyes feature!

aviculor

aang: fuck this noise, i’ll get advice from the last air nomad avatar

yangchen: i gave up that hippie bullshit first chance i got, i love murder

hedge-rambles

I will never not laugh at the bit where Aang is like "finally, an Air Nomad, you get me, right?" and Yangchen just says "sorry bud, I also vote murder".

A close second on that note is of course the trial of Kyoshi in which she manifests in the courtroom just to say "Actually, I did murder him and I'd do it again. But consider: the bitch had it coming".

kittyissac

#tbh I think there's something to be said for the fact that Aang was 12 when he ran away from home#and how there's more than a bit of evidence that the adult airbenders had a less strict pacifistic approach#Aang was purposefully sheltered by Gyatsu to protect his childhood and so he has the ethics of a child#and when he awoke there were no other air nomads around to sit him down and have The Violence Talk#about how yes we're pacifists and murder is bad but there are exceptions#like Gyatsu was a kindly man of the highest order but uh#he didn't just lay down and die on a pile of skulls he just found#man went out taking like 20 fire nation soldiers with him#Aang: ''I could never kill! Gyatsu taught me to abhor all forms of violence“”#Gyatsu: deals out death to attacking soldiers like he's got a side hustle as a claymore mine

zarohk

And the fact that he figures out a more technically complex and socially stable way to remove Ozai without making him a martyr just shows that he has a lot more skill at the problem at hand than most the previous ones.

To me, that whole scene was very much the previous avatars saying “when all you have is a hammer” and Aang going “okay, but what can I do with this Swiss Army knife?” and they don’t give very useful advice about it.

tamer-of-jabberwocks

Personally I also don't think the prior Avatars were all that helpful, but they weren't all saying murder was okay. Aang's there asking for help with Avatar skills because he'd had so minimal training, maybe there's something in the toolbox he doesn't know how to use yet, but they're all trying to make him comfortable with using the hammer he already has and knows how to use. What they were saying was what they thought he needed to hear, based on what they regretted most from how they'd acted as Avatars, and what they thought was most needed here.

Roku regretted not killing Sozin specifically because it gave him the opportunity to come back and kill him, then the Air Nomads. His lack of decisive action led to a lot of tragedy, and so his advice was to make sure whatever he did, make sure it was permanent, or Ozai would come back.

Kyoshi regretted not moving sooner on the threat of Shin the Conqueror and waiting until he was at the very edge of Kyoshi Peninsula before actually doing anything. She allowed a lot of destruction on the continent because she didn't move fast enough. Her advice is to move swiftly instead of allowing Ozai more time to act.

Kuruk basically did nothing as Avatar by his own admission and basically just said that Aang had to do something, and not to back off of his responsibilities because it was hard.

Yangchen is complicated because, well, she isn't talking about one of her own regrets. She's the one trying to give the 'Violence is sometimes necessary' talk to Aang, because she's the best person to tell him his duties as Avatar have to outweigh his duties as an Airbender. Arguably she is the one telling him to murder Ozai, but personally I read that as more 'you need to do what's right for the world, and I am giving you permission to break our cultural rules to do that. Because I am the only person you can ask for absolution.'

They were all trying to offer him spiritual guidance and support, but Aang wasn't looking for emotional support here, he was looking for solutions. Because he had already decided he wouldn't kill Ozai. No advice or absolution was really going to change that he already knew he wouldn't do it.

autistichalsin

#this is a perfect addition#they were trying to be advisors#but aang didn't need guidance at that moment#he needed answers#ironically they all gave guidance that aang had needed and could really have used earlier in his journey#but that he already had learned via his travels#important lessons to be had but not what aang needed in that moment#being swift and decisive to act#and not hesitating or taking half measures#or blowing off duties#these are important lessons to learn for an avatar#and yangchen clearly tried to help aang come to terms#with the dichotomy between being a monk and being the avatar#her words on why he can't separate himself from the world like other monks because of his duty to the world#is actually very important for his future growth i think#but they didn't give him the answers he needed#he knew he needed to stop ozai#but he also knew he couldn't look him in the eye and kill him#aang is actually being really mature in that moment#because he knows he can't face an enemy and kill them#and he's trying to find a path to victory despite that#and he keeps looking for that path#despite all options seeming to say there is none#and his persistence is rewarded when he asks the lion-turtle#who teaches him energybending

This, and also I think it provides the lesson of "the adults/elders in your life/community don't have all the answers for every situation. Sometimes you have to find your own answer, and sometimes the answer can be found with someone else, and it is absolutely okay to keep asking to find the solution to your problem. You're not disrespecting anyone or being arrogant; you know your problem better than anyone, and it is your life and your conscience, and only you can decide what's best for it. If the only advice people have for you is to act in a way that contradicts your own values, it probably is wrong for you, and if these are indeed your deeply-held beliefs, you need to hold on to them and instead try to find a way to confront your problem in a way that does not go against those values. Most of our regrets come from letting ourselves act in ways that contradict our inner system of morality. You have every right to act to avoid moral injury, even if what avoids moral injury for you would be a cause of it in others."

windowz97

girl who sat next to me at the coffee shop had that Tortured By Computer Work look in her eye so i turned to her and was like Are u doing research? and it turns out she (white) just started working as an indigenous liaison for an ecological wellness surveying company (hired bc she worked with the local nation for a year) so i was like OMG can i share resources with you. and whipped out my 1 million notes and academic papers on ethical Indigenous-settler relations/research and Indigenous perspectives on ecological restoration. she was like omg are u sure this is basically a whole course for free and i wanted to tear my shirt off liek YES!!!! I WANT TO PROMOTE LOW BARRIER EDUCATION TO ADVANCE DECOLONIZATION AND RECONCILIATION!!!!!!!!!!! STEP IN2 MY GOOGLE DOC !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

windowz97

here's a googoodrive folder containing learnings on Experiential Learning in Ecological Restoration annnddd Research Practice in Indigenous Contexts. each course folder contains a "![Course number] Notes" document as well as PDFs of all the text-based readings that the notes draw from :-)

i plan 2 make accessible the learnings from my other classes too but i think ill only have time to do all that anonymizing & reformatting once i graduate in a few months lol

thespiritofeon

yo…. when jet breaks in the tea shop and accuses zuko and iroh of beinh firebenders….

do you think any of the patrons looked at zukos scarred face - obviously done by a firebender - and immediately think jet was an asshole? like

jet: hes a firebender!!!!

patrons, thinking about the backstory they concocted for zuko and iroh where their home was invaded by firebenders and they barely survived with their lifes so they could come and have a peaceful life selling tea in a city the war doesnt touch:

Jet: He’s a firebender!

The Patrons to the Tea Shop internally: You fucking stupid, sir? I think you might be stupid.

THE TAGS

captainlordauditor

#if someone shouted something racialized at a food service worker and he pulled swords#if be like ‘yeah that’s fair’

brain-deadx0

He didn’t even use his own swords. He took them from a guard and the guards let him

vareidow

madhyanas

cannot stress enough the importance of having a bucket in your house. a big plastic bucket. helps with housework. helps with morale. get yourself a bucket today

clusterduck28

suigintou

hey boss can you show me where the forklift's self-destruct is so i can keep it from falling into the hands of enemy warehouse crews?

meowingatthesea

adobe-outdesign

In honor of April Fool's, Bulbapedia has released the funniest prank possible in the form of a Pokopia-based page on Humans

and my personal favorite

hexmaniacmareen

They have dex entries and level up moves this is amazing

sexysilverstrider

the group chat when i ask whos available to hang out next week

medusasstory

Honestly this is one of the best formatted jokes of all time.

Behold!

A Cursed Image!

(I had to see this with mine own eyes and I feel compelled to inflict it upon all of you)

4 legs?????

YOU WIN MOST CURSED TAGS THANK YOU

THE SAGA FUCKING CONTINUES

GOOD EVENING AND WELCOME TO THE POST

WORSE IT GOT WORSE

It is a very visibly double pregnant centaur standing between a vet’s office and a doctor’s office do try to keep up

I like to imagine that a centaur tailor would have patterns ready for all the style of centaur pants:

Of course, as our lady is rocking the sundress look, I’m just going to assume she’s going au naturale on the front half. Gotta keep it aired out, you know? Keeps things smelling fresh.

Unfortunately, my Centaur Anatomical Charts do not cover the Reproductive System. Alas

wizardofbones

How is she wearing high heels? Hooves don't have heels!

You are quite right!

She isn’t wearing heels!

Those are her hooves

Seriously. Zoom in.

wizardofbones

Strange

No one ever knows what to say to that

sapphireclawe

So she grew cow hooves or a mix between horse and cow, and trained them to grow into that shape? That's like training your toenails into ballet pointe shoes.

Oh I’m sure she got them done somewhere

thelonebookman

I am depressed by the lack of reference in this curséd thread to John Varley's Gaia trilogy and his Titanides.

*sigh* It's like no one reads the classics anymore...

Holy shit you were not kidding

knittedintoacorner

At least she's wearing horse panties on the horse half?? And from the human doctor's expression, it looks like he's at least one of the baby daddies.

nosferattusx2-deactivated202502

Finally!

Someone looked at that Doctor’s expression!

Like. My guy is very happy to see her.

bacony-cakes

i'd recognize that face anywhere

@misstextures i must show you this as an act of revenge

misstextures

I don't remember what I did for you to show this monstrosity upon me but I probably deserve it to be honest

nosferattusx2-deactivated202502

i still haven't recovered after the monsters inc

azeofspades

TF YOU MEAN THIS ISNT A 10K NOTE POST RB'D BY @hellsite-hall-of-fame?????

questcult

As for clothing, anything that snaps or buckles is unlikely for anatomical reasons.

So they'd likely wear something similar to a loincloth up front with a caparison tossed over their back half.

Which is surprisingly close to what she's wearing in the actual image except she's decided to have her ass all out, likely as a kink thing.

fenixfoxtrot510

theoneicelady

Did they say motherfucking centaur parthenogenesis

dalniente

I think I found the source? No, it does not provide context (that I saw) (but I didn't look very hard).

ttenaciousneatfinds

Everyone has asked very good questions, but I can't help but wonder: Why is she matching a blue dress with a pink tail bow? And why isn't she tying it together with a matching hair accessory? Matching tail and hair accessories would be a lovely and very natural thing to do, to bring the outfit together, but she, despite being a clearly fashionable lady, has chosen not to do so. Is it simply that such matching is out of style, or does it have some meaning to it? Is the choice of pink tail accessory and blue dress symbolic of the gender of the child(children?) she's pregnant with? Going with the build-a-centaur idea, is the human half male and the horse part female? I can absolutely see that being the sort of fashion a proud fashionista horse mommy doing.

Absolutely Cogent Analysis

I make fun of coffee drinkers for being physically addicted to and dependent on badbreath bitterdrink but when i dont have my morning tea i feel like a mentally ill caveman about to do something bad.

^ the gurgling farter

iamoutofideas

you’re all gonna love me for slamming cans of mango monster in the morning

^ the jittering trembler

mazeltron