ANDYY!!

I love steamed crabs and I fucking hate dolphins *no I am not a Gryffindor, I just like the colors*

[miniaturecatmentality]

[strawberri-draws]

Funniest switch up on tiktok recently is the “Reddit aita stories read by a robot voice to Minecraft parkour” posts being slowly replaced with superbat tumblr fics instead, and people in the comments being like “I’ve never thought about Batman and Superman kissing until now but now I’m invested”

[theflavorpurple]

posting these on tumblr bc i forgot i didnt

[redconverseismypersonality]

True love wasn't when I cried to Night Shift. True love was the queer ships I randomly stumbled upon on a Tuesday morning.

[redconverseismypersonality]

You've got a 9-5 so I'll take the night shift" But it's Regulus avoiding Sirius after he took the mark.

"You've got a 9-5 so I'll take the night shift" But it's Narcissa looking back at her memory of Regulus's face after taking the mark because her son had the same guilty-haunted look.

You've got a 9-5 so I'll take the night shift" But it's Barty and Sirius getting reminded of Regulus everytime they remember the other is trapped in the same prison.

"You've got a 9-5 so i'll take the night shift" But it's Walgbura and her promise to not become like her parents.

"You've got a 9-5 so I'll take the night shift" But it's Lily looking at Petunia wondering where had they gone wrong, and why couldn't they fix it.

"You've got a 9-5 so i'll take the night shift" But it's Remus in the year '81.

I fucking hate myself

[redconverseismypersonality]

Barty: So! Anyone wanna say something to get the drinking on the roll?

Regulus: *nursing a fully-filled shot glass* He looked at me as if we could be something more.

Barty: great start! *downs 2 glasses at once*

Barty: Ev, u alrig—?!

Evan: *chugging thing the entire bottle* yea im good it's not like youre the reason im rawdogging this shit

[redconverseismypersonality]

JustLovers!Evan when his partners feel like he isnt loving them enough because he's never going to participate in the shagging bussiness:

[redconverseismypersonality]

Play Horror Games with the Marauders!

Sirius: MY MOTHER IS FAR MORE VICIOUS THAN YOU CUNTS-- *dies after getting cornered at a dead end*

James: *continuous peacock screeching*

Peter: YOU WANKERS BETTER TELL ME WHERE YALL AT BEFORE I SHOVE MERLIN'S WAND UP YOUR ARSES--- *ends up finding the exit and not telling the other two*

Remus:

[redconverseismypersonality]

Peter: *staring off to space* Sometimes James scares me.

Sirius: Care to explain mate?

Peter: It's just, recently, I had nightmares where James was an over-the-top beauty guru who gets into scandals more often than not. He also had a large fanbase and had an equally-- if not, bigger hateclub. He's also somehow racist?? One night I dreamt that beauty guru James invited Pandora Rosier to teach her how to do her eyeshadow but she ended up doing it better than him and he got lowkey pissed??

Remus: Being a beauty guru somehow fits him

Sirius: Wormy, you've lost the plot, name one moment where our dear James acted bigoted.

Peter: That's why I said nightmare!

Remus: *patting Peter on the shoulder* Well, the important thing here is that beauty-guru James isn't real, and he can't hurt you.

James: *slamming the common room door open in galaxy-eyeshadow makeup*

HI SISTERS

[redconverseismypersonality]

Is Kenji Sato the next big name to join the 'Tumblr Sexyman' boy band???

[redconverseismypersonality]

Lily: *calls out* PETUNIA CAN U THROW ME SOME PADS

Petunia: *muffled shouting*

Lily: *still calling out* WHAT??

Petunia: *opening the door and tossing out sone pads before promptly closing it* USE UR DAMN WAND

Lily: YOU'RE JUST BLOODY BITTER

Lily: DO U GENUINLY THINK I CARRY MY WAND TO THE LOO??

Petunia: THEN USE UR PISSING WIZARDING MAGIC BULLSHIT TO TURN THAT PAD INTO A WAND AND ACTUALLY DO SHITE YOURSELF SOMETIME

Lily: YOU RAGING BLOODY BITTER CU—

[redconverseismypersonality]

Remus: Hi can you---

Sirius: let you borrow my vinyls? Explain Pureblood Society for an upcoming project? Share ideas for a new prank? Accompany you to Hogsmeade? Open up? Expose my deepest darkest secret of being terrified of the concept of a life where I couldn't live to the fullest? Expose my deep emotional yearning for you? Say how I long to have you in my life wherein if Midas touched us, we would still be together as gold statues?

Sirius: Nvm, Ignore that crap, you're actually voluntarily asking for help??

[redconverseismypersonality]

Sirius: What if I was wrong for leavin--

Remus: No

Sirius: Can u be more specific

Remus: No.

Sirius: I see you placed a period on the end, shit's actually sirius rn

[redconverseismypersonality]

Why can't we talk in hashtags irl?? It'd be so helpful to say "I hate you, I hope u slip on ur dog's ashes", but then come out as #################### so I won't get in trouble ://

[redconverseismypersonality]

why do you like red converses so much???

We go toe to toe, through thick and thin, wherever we may be, it's always stuck with me, when it's feeling sad and blue, it calls my name and I'll find it, we have a bond, that's tied and true, I and it, It and I, two by two