Hellenora's Keep

Honestly, I just reblog stuff I think is neat and maybe sometimes post my own art

[transfagrified-in-the-void]

Here is a free pdf of the players handbook

Here is a free pdf of xanathars guide to everything

Here is a free pdf to monsters manual

Here is a free pdf to tashas cauldron of everything

Here is a free pdf to dungeon master’s guide

Here is a free pdf to volo’s guide to monsters

Here is a free pdf of mordenkainen’s tomb of foes

For all your dnd purposes

[zxiqky-wicky]

Reblogging for other dnd nerds

[demon-rum]

>^>

[jacobtheloofah]

also here is a whole website that not only has a shit ton of adventures and such but lets you search for any item or npc or whatever and see their stats and info at your fingertips

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[parkchanwoohoo]

“In 1404, King Taejong fell from his horse during a hunting expedition. Embarrassed, looking to his left and right, he commanded, “Do not let the historian find out about this.” To his disappointment, the historian accompanying the hunting party included these words in the annals, in addition to a description of the king’s fall.“

LMFAOOOOOO rip to that guy

[shitacademicswrite]

i thought maybe this was fake, but there’s even a citation!

Taejong Sillok Book 7. 5th year of King Taejong’s Reign (1404), February 8.

[delphinidin4]

Happy 618th anniversary of the day King Taejong fell from his horse!

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

Apparently the recorders were really intense about this. We have a record of King Taejong complaining about a recorder who followed him on a hunt in disguise and another who eavesdropped on him behind a screen. No one was allowed to see the records, even the king (one king did and killed five men based on what was written there, after which they took greater care to ensure it would never happen again), and changing the content or disclosing it was a capital punishment. Even when there were rival political factions trying to influence the writers, they wrote down what was a revision and what wasn’t and kept an original version with no revisions in it.

They also made sure to back up their data. They made four copies of it, then when three copies were lost in the Imrim Wars they decided to make five more copies just in case. One copy was destroyed in a rebellion, another was partially damaged in an invasion, and Japan stole one copy during their occupation and moved it to Tokyo University, where it was mostly destroyed in the Kanto Earthquake (47 books remained and were returned to South Korea in 2006). Now the whole thing is digitized, free on the internet, and translated into modern Korean for all to see.

It took centuries of meticulous recorders, justifiably paranoid copiers, absolutely determined historians, and painstaking infrastructure for this joke to be possible. Happy 618th anniversary to the day King Taejong fell from his horse.

[anonymous-ivplay]

Happy 619th anniversary to the day King Taejong fell from his horse!

[bunjywunjy]

happy 620th anniversary of the day a king fell off his horse everybody

[flyingscanian]

happy 621st anniversayr of the day a king fell of his horse

[shadowsrayn]

Happy 622nd anniversary of the day a king fell off of his horse and was really embarrassed.

[unicarcass-archive]

ONE OF MY FAVORITE VIDEOS EVER

[jaydove-writes]

That's nyctophilia. Necrophilia is an obsession with the number 9.

[lavender-lentils]

No, you’re thinking of nonaphilia. Necrophilia is the concept of putting friends and family in favourable positions, not because theyre the best at those positions, but because you know them.

[jaydove-writes]

You're thinking of nepotism, necrophilia is the name of the main villain of the DS classic, Kirby Mass Attack.

[kcbutontblr]

no actually, i think you're thinking of necrodeus! necrophilia is a fictional grimoire appearing in stories by the horror writer hp lovecraft and his followers.

[jaydove-writes]

That's the necronomicon. Necrophilia is the belief that nothing matters, used in both positive and negative connotations.

[jantesika]

I believe that's Nihilism. necrophilia is summoning and speaking to the dead!

[jaydove-writes]

That's necromancy, necrophilia is the country Dutch people come from.

[ingridverse]

That's the Netherlands. Necrophilia is an old-fashioned thin disk shaped candy that comes in rolls

[theeclectickoalastudent]

Those're Necco Wafers. Necrophilia is the illness where you fall asleep under stress.

[bluejay-07]

I believe you’re thinking of narcolepsy. Necrophilia is the fictional magical ability to raise the dead, with varying degrees of sentience. It features heavily in The Locked Tomb series.

[renee-niles]

No, dude, that's necromancy again. Necrophilia is a large cemetary with elaborate tombs built to house remains, like a city of the dead.

[starburstdragon]

Im pretty sure that’s a necropolis. Necrophilia is a post-mortem examination on an animal species.

[mister-e-muss]

Nah, you’re thinking of a necropsy. Necrophilia is a type of angel that’s said to be part human. Shadowhunters books use it as a concept I think.

[phrenic-a]

Nope you’re thinking of Nephilim. Necrophilia is a free virtual pet website popular in the early 2010s

[saintofdoubt]

No, you're thinking of Neopets. Necrophilia is a newly formed word.

[veradragonjedi]

Nah, you're thinking of neologism! Pretty sure necrophilia is an American operating company that is best known for stock car racing, considered to be one of the top ranked motorsports organizations in America.

[beansfrombeans]

pretty sure that's NASCAR, necrophilia is actually the term for someone who doesn't feel like they fully fit the label "man" or "woman"

[darkaviarymc]

No, you're thinking of nonbinary. Necrophilia is a type of infection where the cells spreading out from a central point, for example: a spider bite, start to die.

[cetos-tide]

No, you’re thinking of necrosis. Necrophilia is nonmetal element on the periodic table that makes up most of Earth’s atmosphere.

[mikkeneko]

Pretty sure that's nitrogen. Necrophilia is a type of hand weapon that reinforces the fingers for a punch

[fluffmugger]

nah that's a knuckle duster. Necrophilia is the death of cells through injury or disease

[dalniente]

That's necrosis again, pretty sure. Necrophilia is a drug that affects mood or behavior, or relieves pain but induces drowsiness.

[elfwreck]

No, that's a narcotic. Necrophilia is the abnormal fear of anything new.

[sparkylurkdragon]

No, I believe that's neophobia. Necrophillia is flesh-eating disease.

[smellmyhead]

Nah, bud, pretty sure that's necrotizing fasciitis. Necrophilia is the wise old rat who helps out Mrs. Frisby in the book that got adapted into THE SECRET OF NIMH.

[mousefists]

No that’s Nicodemus. Pretty sure Necrophilia is that inventor guy who did revolutionary science stuff but now his name just makes me think of cyber trucks and the collapse of the US governmental system.

[smellmyhead]

Uh-huh, nope, you're thinking of Nikola Tesla. Understandable mix-up. No, necrophilia is a smooth, fuzzless peach.

[youandsometimeswhy]

you're thinking of a nectarine. necrophilia is when you don't want people around where you live to do things that might be good for the greater community and you might agree in theory, but you don't want it where you can see/hear/smell/etc it

[smellmyhead]

No, that's NIMBYism. Necrophilia is the iridescent mineral accretion that some bivalves secrete to coat (and protect themselves from) parasites they accidentally ingest

[globalincident]

No that's nacre. Necrophilia is a book written by Aristotle, discussing ethics and how to live a virtuous life by forming beneficial habits.

[smellmyhead]

Oh -totally understandable confusion here, you’re referring to Nicomachean Ethics, whereas Necrophilia (as I’ve recently learned) is a “post-grunge” band out of Alberta, Canada.

[aradia-queen-of-the-sheep]

It's very easy to get confused, but that's actually Nickelback. Necrophilia is an old timey movie theatre, where admission only cost a five cents.

[opalescent-apples]

That's a nickelodeon. Necrophilia is that pokemon that tried to eat the sun back in the gen 7 games.

[flipperdipper10]

Nonono that's Necrozma

Necrophilia is a 2d shape with 9 sides and 9 angles.

[ladylolalilly]

No, that’s a nonogon. Necrophilia is a piece of jewelry worn around the neck.

[the-imaginary-ditto]

No, that's a necklace. Necrophilia is a Warhammer 40K faction consisting of ancient robots.

[wraith-the-rock]

no, i’m pretty sure that’s the Necrons, necrophilia is the 60th element on the periodic table with the symbol Nd

[the-one-and-only-overlass]

No, that's neodymium. Necrophilia is a medical specialty focused on kidney disease.

[indizureberry]

Nah, that's nephrology. Necrophilia is when the brain is wired differently than others

[opalescent-apples]

That's neurodivergence. Necrophilia is the sweet stuff that hummingbirds and bees drink from flowers.

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

No no no, that's nectar. Necrophilia is actually a Finnish company that makes very rugged mobile phones.

[el-the-cell]

No! That’s nokia! Necrophilia is a kind of ice cream composed of chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry, named after an italian city.

[sarahwatchesthings]

That's Neapolitan. Necrophilia is a Greek philosophical movement that defines the origin of all reality as an indescribable source called the One.

[origami-butterfly]

Actually that's neoplatonism! Necrophilia is the addictive chemical in cigarettes.

[loonstar4477]

You’re thinking of Nicotine. Necrophilia is the chemical element that’s abbreviated with Ni.

[jewish-joy]

I recently got an on-campus job. During the interview process, I requested that I not be scheduled on Friday nights or Saturdays as I am a Jewish student.

My boss immeadiately brightened and rushed to explain - "Of course ! Of course! We want to accomodate you! We have another worker who takes off for Ramadan. Do you need to take off for Ramadan?"

I shook my head, incredibly confused. "Uh. That's. Not my jurisdiction. I'm good." Boss nodded but was sure to add "Let me know if that ever changes. We can help you with Ramadan."

[maimonideznuts]

[jewish-joy]

@vangoggles THAT WHAT I WAS SAYING .

And I was finally on a shift with this guy. We were both sitting in silence because we had the ass-crack-of-dawn slot.

Over my coffee and twirling my Magen David necklace around my finger, I say "So. Ahmed. Ramadan.

And Ahmed over his energy drink, sighs - "don't you say shit about that."

[jewish-joy]

#what's the bet Ahmed was just asking for certain shifts during Ramadan and Boss got excited and was like “just take the whole ramadan off!”#“don't even worry about it! we support you! take the time you need!” I'm scheduled to work with him tomorrow morning so will find out then 🫡 .We're both STEM majors who use the early empty hours to study so I will report if I get more than a grunt out of him about it.

[jewish-joy]

another stupid-early morning, and between our respective course loads- him organic chemistry and me pathophysiology- I asked for the full story in how he got all of Ramadan off.

He sighed, and let me know that he did indeed try to explain to our manager that all he needed was to get shifts not around sunrise or sunset. But that in him explaining what Ramadan was, the plot very quickly got lost into this unhinged confusion where our boss was trying to google how people could survive an entire month without food or water.

So halfway through, he decided to pivot and go along with it, expecting less shifts in March because that's a difficult academic time anyway. Then, he had to keep a straight face when the end-product was the entire time off with paid leave.

So, now, he's in a hell partially of his own making where his boss genuinely believes he doesn't eat for a month and is trying to offer all non-Christian workers March off. I offered him time off for Hanukkah. He hit his head against the desk, and groaned.

[kittydesade]

[shah4139-offical]

This post is a whirlwind and it's from this year. Didn't know Tumblr could still be this iconic

[jewish-joy]

With this post making the rounds again, I really do want to emphasize one thing-

I got hired at my job February 1st, which was when this interview was. They were short staffed and needed me to fill in. Ramadan started February 28th.

So, my lovely boss really did offer to hire me just to then give me paid leave for an entire month barely three weeks after I started.

He's wonderful to work with, but I'm hesitating to explain the high holiday season to him because I just don't know where that conversation will go.

[jewish-microwave-laser]

ramadan is only in a couple weeks which means it's time to bring this post back

[beardedmrbean]

[assortedcrackers]

I am losing my shit right now

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[cilceon]

Today’s a shitty day for a lot of people, myself included, so here’s a 30 second video of my cat purring in maximum biscuit mode as he presses his head into my heart which is his favorite activity to do when my depression it’s bad. you are welcome to live vicariously through it

[kirianthedivorce]

Absolutely losing it at this Reddit post

And the update

She buttered Jorts

[anoonzee]

The outrage summed in a perfect Tweet:

[notemily]

FINALLY

I’ve been collecting the best Jorts tweets and waiting until the moment he showed up on my dash to post them. So here you are, the curated best of the past, oh, day or so:

[rhipidurafan]

Some additional quality memes from the past 24 hours:

Meanwhile, OP has continued tracking trash can mishaps on twitter:

And a quality photo of this sweet potato:

[rhipidurafan]

An update for those not following Jorts’ twitter account, starting with a transcription of the Wellerman cover:

Link to the lovely video

There once was a ship that put to sea The name of the ship was the Jorts and Jean The ship she rolled and her closet doors closed Oh no, where’s Jorts? Oh no!

Soon may the smarter cat come To save poor Jorts so orange and dumb One day when the butterin’s done We’ll take our leave and go

When Pam came on, she had a plan To teach our Jorts about garbage cans Pam meant well but her plans fell flat When HR said, “don’t butter the cat”

Soon may the smarter cat come To save poor Jorts so orange and dumb One day when the butterin’s done We’ll take our leave and go

Now Jean the smart cat comes She saves poor Jorts so orange and dumb Now that the butterin’s done We’ll take our leave and go

We’ll take our leave and go

We’ll take our leave and go

Additional quality memes:

A recipe for Buttered Jorts:

Recent Jorts activities:

And some very wise words from the cat himself:

[petermorwood]

This is the largest Jorts post I found before I decided to stop, and combines a lot of memes in one convenient package.

Along with cats, of course. Smartly done!

[calligrafiti]

The person running the Jorts Twitter is using it to promote unions, which is awesome.

[breelandwalker]

FNALLY! All the premium Jorts content in one place!

[baybelletrist]

JOOOOOORTS

[siriosa]

the blessing of jorts. the patience of jean.

[worldofstring]

The sheer delight when you finally learn the story of Jorts and Jean, of whom you had only vaguely heard, and what’s more you find SOMEONE YOU KNOW among the Jorts poets

[boybeetles]

You know technology literacy is dying because I saw this meme with 76k likes

F11 the full screen button? You’re scared of the full screen button? F10?? It opens the menu bar???

[boybeetles]

Computers are so scary what if I accidentally hit F12 in a steam game and it takes a screenshot. What if I press shift + F12 while in word and accidentally save my document 😖

[yetanothergreyjedi]

[shower-thoughts-last-responder]

If you had to learn what the F keys on your computer do through me reblogging this post, then I'm glad you did. Computer literacy is not a skill that gets taught anymore, and it is absolutely one that needs to be taught in order to be learned. Don't ever feel bad for not knowing something, but ☝️ don't ever stop learning learning about your environment, the tools you use, and especially the people around you

[headspace-hotel]

Never stop learning+ Never stop sharing what you learned

[dogpuppy]

[bearotonin-international]

[kaity--did]

The problem with having a child with an attorney that has spoken to the child like an adult since birth is that she's 4 years old and she's negotiating the order in which we're going to complete tasks as a family to best suit her idea of an ideal day.

[kaity--did]

Penny: We go home, we play the mirror game, we have dessert, we play more games, we have fun deal?

Me: Okay well actually we're going to go home, have dinner, then dessert, then we can play your video game, then tubby then bed

Penny: Okay no tubby, games first, deal?

Me: This is not - what is happening right now?

Penny: Dada?

Dada: Arbitration?

Penny: DEALS!

[kaity--did]

Every single thing in our lives has become a negotiation and it is frankly ridiculous as it is hilarious.

Penny: I want to use bare foot when we go outside

Me: I didn't know we were going outside but you have to wear shoes girl

Penny: okay but what about I use bare foot's but at Penny's house? This deal?

Me: you know what yeah fine if you agree to not fight about shoes when we leave the house you can be barefoot in the back yard, deal.

Penny: -sticks her hand out expectantly- we deal?

I think I just made a verbal contract with a 4 year old.

[kaity--did]

She's attempting to establish evidence I think

Penny: but I want to go shool pwease

Dada: okay well it is 8pm, so you have to go to sleep now

Penny: okay but I see my fwiends at shool now please, deal?

Dada: Darling no one is at school, all your friends are asleep as well.

Penny: all Penny's fwiends are sweep? What about we... get in Dadas car and check to see watch them sweep, yes deal?

Dada: I cannot begin to explain to you why that can not happen

[kaity--did]

The great thing about being beholden to Penny the Deals Warlock is that she is also beholden to the art of the deal

Me: (watching Penny scoot her step stool over to where we keep the candy jar): hey honey we're literally walking out the door to go get dinner, maybe we wait on the candy okay?

Penny: Oh but I will have some candy?

Me: Why don't you come have some mac and cheese and then when we get home you can have some candy, deal?

Penny: (running out the door) oh, yes this is deals!

[kaity--did]

We are visiting my family and Papa has quickly had to pay patronage to Penny the Deals Warlock

Papa: (yesterday morning, when Penny was a little grumpy) What about you come downstairs and we'll have some waffles and then tomorrow Papa will take you to the Diner in town for breakfast?

Penny: (extending her tiny hand to a VERY confused man) this is deal?

Papa: (not knowing hes entering a literal contract) uhm yeah deal.

-smash cut to 6:30 AM this morning-

Penny (running down the hallway in bare feet) 👹BREAKFAST DEALS👹

[kaity--did]

Penny has a canker sore to end all canker sores, to the point where she hasn't been able to eat so we had to make some deals surrounding getting some medicine on it because a hungry Penny Rose is like a angry demon queen

Me: Okay baby this is going to suck. This is going to hurt real bad for a second and then it's going to feel weird and then it's going to feel good. You're going to hate it. But if you let Mama get these three medicines in and on you [Listerine, Antacid, Tylenol] you can scream it out and then we'll go get some ice cream! Deal?

Penny: (obviously not thrilled with this idea) okay, three big shreams, three medicines, ice cream ... it will suck... ice cream ... deal. (Sticks out hand and we shake on it)

Me: okay let's do this I'm so sorry (starts the process)

Penny: ( In between her big screams ) IM GONNA GET LOTS OF FRINKLES

[kaity--did]

My husband is trying to make a deal with Penny to get upstairs and get in the bath tub

Penny: I will go upstairs and get my body clean but you hafta titch me, deal?

Dada: I would love to make this deal with you kid but I literally have no idea what you are saying- I don't know what the terms are, you're speaking a language I don't speak

Penny: you have to titch me like mama does okay DEAL!? (Sticks tiny hand out aggressively)

Dada: (looks at me bewildered for help)

Me: ( starts making a quick tick tick tick sound imitating a stop watch like I'm timing her, while penny jumps around yelling YES TITCH ME LIKE THAT)

Dada: In what world was I ever going to figure that out, thank you for acting as our legal interpreter yes deal let's go!

and off she sprints.

[kaity--did]

Penny does not want to go to bed, but man is it time for her to go to bed

Penny: But I don't want to be sleeping, I want to stay up now! I want to see Grampy and Cozy and Guppie and Papa!

Mama: What if we video call all the grands and say good night to everyone? If we do that will you then go to bed no fussing?

Penny: Oh yes, this is deals! -sticks her hand out to shake-

** we make the rounds and video call all her grandparents, they are all already in bed and say good night and penny hangs up the last video call and toddles into bed with minimal fussing **

Penny : (after a few minutes of silence, over the video monitor, to herself in her dark bedroom) I hafta respect da deals.

[kaity--did]

Every morning Penny wakes up, and she asks if we have decorated her house with "Halloween every where" and every morning I have had to tell her not yet baby but soon. This last morning Penny had to go to pre k a little earlier then she is used to cause Daddy had court and I had a dentist appointment, which made her a little bummed out... or so I thought

Me: Hey baby do you want to make a deal about school?

Penny: (immediately sticks out her hand, literally no hesitation, her entire demeanor changing in an instant) yes let's deals, I will be big and brave and go to school no fussing, and you will put Halloween every where all over my house, okay this is deals Mama??

I think I just got hustled by a 4 year old...

[kaity--did]

A tangentially related update :

Penny: (is doing some strange interpretive dance to let us know she's not a fan of the cup we've chosen to put her juice in, mind you this is the only clean cup at this moment. She is hopping up and down, and swinging her arm like an elephant trunk, she is pirouetting, her hands are on her hips. Shes is completely silent)

Husband: (exasperated) okay but DID you make a deal with SOMETHING while you were pregnant ? It's the only explanation I can come up with.

[kaity--did]

sometimes people will ask me if penny is still making deals and here is an update for you to let you know:

Husband: okay, you can not leave your room until someone comes and gets you okay? You're getting up way too early and we're guests in Papa and Guppies house so you stay and play in your room and someone will come get you when you can come out of your room tomorrow morning, deal?

Penny: (hand extended, plotting) deal

-smash cut to the next morning, penny is NOT in her room at the allotted 7:30 AM retrieve Penny Rose Time, we find her in bed cuddled up with my mom and dad watching a movie-

Penny: (hands out in a "calm down" gesture) LISTEN LISTEN I DIDNT LEAVE! I DIDNT- I didn't break da deals! I just knocked on the door until Papa came and got me.

Papa: (laughing hysterically) WELL DONT SNITCH!

Penny: I DIDNT DO NOTHING I KEPT MY DEALS! YOU JUS SAID SOMEONE HAD TO COME GET ME! PAPA COME GET ME!

(so we have to be insanely detailed in our deals because she did knock on her bed room door and yell PAPA! PAPA! PAPA! At 4:30 in the morning until my dad came and got her and you know what that's on us 🤣)

[say0ranarts]

been drawing sticker sheets...! 3rd semester shuake always on my mind🥺❄️

[tetohina-deactivated20240718]

[inthefallofasparrow]

[eilooxara]

Hamsterdam

[hearteyedraccoon]

[habkeinb0ck-deactivated20250609]

Kontent

[magikus-miccentyu]

Theres no fukin betterer way zum flyen.

[toonbeez]

Loud audio warning?? At least it’s loud to meee

I posted this elsewhere awhile ago but I might as well throw it here

[kaity--did]

We do not do elf of the shelf but our house does have borrowers. Penny knows that if she leaves a mess out at night the borrowers will take that as a sign that they can have it and take it into the walls to build their homes

This teaches her to out her stuff away at the end of the night or I chuck it out and also sometimes she wakes up and yells "HEY ELEVES I LEFT YOU SOME STUFF!" And it is hilarious

[kaity--did]

Penny: THE ELVES HAVE ONIONTIZED

My mom on FaceTime: ???

Me: I had to explain to Penny how the borrowers are part of the elf union and so they go to North Pole the last 3 weeks of the year so no one ever has to work too much over time and that's why they haven't taken mommy's wrapping paper or scissors or anything else I've left out... shes trying to explain the elf union to you.

Penny: THEY GET PAID EXTRA CAUSE OF THE ONION

[adverbian]

[ao3cassandraic]

'tis the season for solidarity

(go throw an onion at Starbucks management)

[just-positivity-stuff]

[mypatchworkreflection]

These are suggested for serving to recovering alcoholics, but I think they’re just fun and cool anyway? I like a fancy beverage, it doesn’t have to have booze. That cucumber Collins sounds refreshing AF

[shinyhappygoth]

And children! Children love a fancy drink! Let them be included!