DEAR READER
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
NASA

if i look back, i am lost
wallacepolsom
Sade Olutola

pixel skylines

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$LAYYYTER

@theartofmadeline
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Love Begins

izzy's playlists!

⁂
Jules of Nature
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
will byers stan first human second
Game of Thrones Daily

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@gretis-me
New the Batman movie this, new the Batman movie that - everyone acts like the greatest piece of Batman related media had not been created YEARS ago by kids on tumblr
IT’S NOT ‘PEEKED’ MY INTEREST
OR ‘PEAKED’
BUT PIQUED
‘PIQUED MY INTEREST’
THIS HAS BEEN A CAPSLOCK PSA
THIS IS ACTUALLY REALLY USEFUL THANK YOU
ADDITIONALLY:
YOU ARE NOT ‘PHASED’. YOU ARE ‘FAZED.’
IF IT HAS BEEN A VERY LONG DAY, YOU ARE ‘WEARY’. IF SOMEONE IS ACTING IN A WAY THAT MAKES YOU SUSPICIOUS, YOU ARE ‘WARY’.
ALL IN ‘DUE’ TIME, NOT ‘DO’ TIME
‘PER SE’ NOT ‘PER SAY’
THANK YOU
BREATHE - THE VERB FORM IN PRESENT TENSE
BREATH - THE NOUN FORM
THEY ARE NOT INTERCHANGEABLE
WANDER - TO WALK ABOUT AIMLESSLY
WONDER - TO THINK OF IN A DREAMLIKE AND/OR WISTFUL MANNER
THEY ARE NOT INTERCHANGEABLE (but one’s mind can wander)
DEFIANT - RESISTANT DEFINITE - CERTAIN
WANTON - DELIBERATE AND UNPROVOKED ACTION (ALSO AN ARCHAIC TERM FOR A PROMISCUOUS WOMAN)
WONTON - IT’S A DUMPLING THAT’S ALL IT IS IT’S A FUCKING DUMPLING
BAWL- TO SOB/CRY
BALL- A FUCKING BALL
YOU CANNOT “BALL” YOUR EYES OUT
AND FOR FUCK’S SAKE, IT’S NOT “SIKE”; IT’S “PSYCH”. AS IN “I PSYCHED YOU OUT”; BECAUSE YOU MOMENTARILY MADE SOMEONE BELIEVE SOMETHING THAT WASN’T TRUE.
THANK YOU.
*slams reblog*
IT’S ‘MIGHT AS WELL’. ‘MIND AS WELL’ DOES NOT MAKE GRAMMATICAL SENSE.
SLEIGHT - DEXTERITY, ARTIFICE, CRAFT (FROM ‘SLY’) SLIGHT - VERY LITTLE, FRAIL, DELICATE
IT’S ‘SLEIGHT OF HAND’.
DISCRETE - SEPARATE, DISTINCT, PARTED
DISCREET - SUBTLE, STEALTHY, DIPLOMATIC
AND TO CONTINUE THE OP’S THEME
IT’S SNEAK PEEK
NOT SNEAK PEAK
A SNEAK PEAK WOULD BE A MOUNTAIN ENGAGED IN ESPIONAGE
THEY ARE VERY LARGE AND WOULD FIND THIS GENERALLY DIFFICULT
THANK
(OH AND ONE OTHER THING
BULLION = PRECIOUS METAL
BOUILLON = STOCK, FROM THE FRENCH “BOUILLER,” TO BOIL)
SHUDDER:
SHUTTER:
NOT SAME NOT SAME
sleight of hand: magic tricks slight of hand: President-Elect
LIGHTNING= BOLT OF ELECTRICITY COMING FROM THE SKY DURING A STORM
LIGHTENING= SOMETHING BECOMING LIGHTER
Oh look, all my pet peeves in one place!
While we’re at it, if you can’t process dairy you are ‘lactose intolerant’ not ‘lactose and tolerant’
Watch and Pass on!!! 😂😂💀💩
Now this is a hamless prank.
OMFg IM KATHY
HOW I LOVE IT
i love how everyone has a coworker they immediately call. everyone has that one friend who would save you from the headless customer.
Ch💓
Take the time to watch this, it’s MAGIC
what even
What kind of magic is this?
THIS IS SO AWESOME!!!! 💖
In case anyone else logged in to tumblr.com today and found the majority of the posts on their dash to be hidden with the option to “expand” them and went “oh no”
go to Settings > Dashboard to turn it off
Thank you @radarsteddybear !!!!! You’re a Tumblr life saver 🤗🤗🤗
I'm gonna need to remember this prompt for when I'm having a bad day
anyone please ask your crush out like this
The thrilling answer
no they need to kiss out behind the school!!!!
oops my hand slipped
nexttttt pleaseee :D
Come on guys add on to this tumblr needs this to be a comic series
I was asked for doing this, so I did
BAM!
I’m out of ideas! XD
next?
THIS IS TOO CUTE I CAN’T LEAVE IT ALONE I’M SORRY
OHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDD!!!!!!!
LOOOK ATT THIIIIS!!!!
LOOOOK ATTT THIIIISS!!!!
80
NEEEXT!!!!!
IT HAD TO BE DONE:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*O*
OH MY GOOD!!!!!
ThAT’S IT!!!!
#0o0#
so yeah
I LOVE THIS
REBLOGGED THIS TWICE
I have a need…..I must add to this…
still waiting for the smut
C’mon guys… it needs some smut
THIS NEEDS TO CONTINUE
SOMEONE PLEASE CONTINUE IT
Not so perfect but still perfect first date
HOLY SHIT I LOVE THIS WITH MY ENTIRE HEART
O HECk IT GOT bETtEr
OMG, THIS IS PERFECT 💖
notes/letters=the most intimate gesture!
THERES MORE
I reblogged this like a year and a half ago and IT CONTINUES!?
ITS BACK OMG
Omg it’s here!
THIS CUTE I WANNA CONTINUE IT
Ok I tried because this is so cute
OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDFFDFF
IT GOT EVEN BETTER OMG
This has to be the most adorable thing I’ve seen today.
This gave me so many happy and cute feels
every time this circles back there’s always more, I love you all
this warms my heart on so many levels <3
ITS BACK
I’m just sitting here
Hitting my knee
Squealing and smiling omfg
hey remember that time tumblr wrote an. entire. gay webcomic.
This just goes to show that we can all do great things if we collaborate and accept each other.
AAAAAAHH ITS BACK
THIS IS SOOOOO ADORABLE ♡♡♡♡♡♡
Only because it’s fucking cute!!!
This is so beautiful ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Let it continue!!! Here’s my addiction If the text is to small: Happy birthday!!! ……….. I’ll see you later today? If you want…. I have something Important to ask you,,,, >.> <.< ^_^;; ^///////^
Keepin it rollin!
My contribution to this adorable story ^^
Can I request naming the big guy Damian and the little one Ollie?
Plot twist. I kinda want the big one to be Ollie and the little guy Damian.
Double plot twist: same
i added sum more–
This is my favorite.
B E A U T I F U L
The last hand kiss got me…..oh wow.
IT’S B A C K
i love this so much
HI YES THIS IS MY CONTRIBUTION
It got so much better than the last time i saw it!!❤❤❤
LAST I WAS HER ETHERE WAS A DIFFERENTS TORY ITS BRANCHING AND I COULD NOT BE HAPPIER
This fucking comic had been added to over the course of six years. That’s insane, it’s beautiful. It’s inspiring, all these people from different places at different times some have moved on other still here it’s wild.
oh my hecc i love it
YES THERES MORE
I will always reblog this
I can’t. Too cute. This gave me too many feels at 2:30 in the morning. I need more but I can’t draw.
@hellcattriesagain???
Hi yall, I sent our good good boys to the dance <3
It’s back holy shit, also! The queen, I’m assuming, has a girlfriend!!! Mlm and wlw solidarity!
YEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!!!!!! THERE’S MOOORRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Gets better everytime it appears on my dash
This is ADORABLE!!!!
THIS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER
I ship this with my life! ❤️❤️❤️
Omg this is CUTE.
My life is complete now
I was literally awwwing my way thru the whole thing :D
I love this with every cell in my body! THIS IS THE CUTEST SHIT EVER! AND ALSO I LOVE THE DIFFERENT ART STYLES LIKE EFFJHHDFHJDGJHDH
👀 👀 i’m bringing in the lesbians
OMG OMG OMG OMG YOU BROUGHT THIS BACK AAAAAAAA
AYOOOOOOO
IT’S BACK AND HAS LESBIANS
FUCK YES
IT’S BACK
This is too beautiful
I THINK I CRIED
PlEaSe bring thIs bacK again
Tumblr heritage post, everyone needs to see this 💖
my heart 💖💖
this is adorable omg omg
LETS GO LESBIANS
yes i know im ruining it but i like lesbians so
This is so AMAZING!
Can’t catch me.
HERE’S THE THING THOUGH
I used to work for a call center and I was doing a political survey and I called this number that was randomly generated for me and the way our system worked was voice-activated so when the other person said hello you’d get connected to them, so I just launch right into my “Harvard University and NPR blah blah blah” thing and then there’s this long pause and I think the person’s hung up even though I didn’t hear a click
And then I hear “you shouldn’t be able to call this number.”
So I apologize and go into the preset spiel about because we aren’t selling anything, etc. etc. and the answer I get is
“No, I know that. What I mean is that it should be impossible for you to call this number, and I need to know how you got it.”
I explain that it’s randomly generated and I’m very sorry for bothering him, and go to hang up. And before I can click terminate, I hear:
“Ma’am, this is a matter of national security.”
I accidentally called the director of the FBI.
My job got investigated because a computer randomly spit out a number to the Pentagon.
This is my new favourite story.
When I was in college I got a job working for a company that manages major air-travel data. It was a temp gig working their out of date system while they moved over to a new one, since my knowing MS Dos apparently made me qualified.
There was no MS Dos involved. Instead, there was a proprietary type-based OS and an actually-uses-transistors refrigerator-sized computer with switches I had to trip at certain times during the night as I watched the data flow from six pm to six AM on Fridays and weekends. If things got stuck, I reset the server.
The company handled everything from low-end data (hotel and car reservations) to flight plans and tower information. I was weighed every time I came in to make sure it was me. Areas of the building had retina scanners on doors.
During training. they took us through all the procedures. Including the procedures for the red phone. There was, literally, a red phone on the shelf above my desk. “This is a holdover from the cold war.” They said. “It isn’t going to come up, but here’s the deal. In case of nuclear war or other nation-wide disaster, the phone will ring. Pick up the phone, state your name and station, and await instructions. Do whatever you are told.”
So my third night there, it’s around 2am and there’s a ringing sound.
I look up, slowly. The Red phone is ringing.
So I reach out, I pick up the phone. I give my name and station number. And I hear every station head in the building do the exact same. One after another, voices giving names and numbers. Then silence for the space of two breaths. Silence broken by…
“Uh… Is Shantavia there?”
It turns out that every toll free, 1-900 or priority number has a corresponding local number that it routs to at its actual destination. Some poor teenage girl was trying to dial a friend of hers, mixed up the numbers, and got the atomic attack alert line for a major air-travel corporation’s command center in the mid-west United States.
There’s another pause, and the guys over in the main data room are cracking up. The overnight site head is saying “I think you have the wrong number, ma’am.” and I’m standing there having faced the specter of nuclear annihilation before I was old enough to legally drink.
The red phone never rang again while I was there, so the people doing my training were only slightly wrong in their estimation of how often the doomsday phone would ring.
Every time I try to find this story, I end up having to search google with a variety of terms that I’m sure have gotten me flagged by some watchlist, so I’m reblogging it again where I swear I’ve reblogged it before.
But none of these stories even come close to the best one of them all; a wrong number is how the NORAD Santa Tracker got started.
Seriously, this is legit.
In December 1955, Sears decided to run a Santa hotline. Here’s the ad they posted.
Only problem is, they misprinted the number. And the number they printed? It went straight through to fucking NORAD. This was in the middle of the Cold War, when early warning radar was the only thing keeping nuclear annihilation at bay. NORAD was the front line.
And it wasn’t just any number at NORAD. Oh no no no.
Terri remembers her dad had two phones on his desk, including a red one. “Only a four-star general at the Pentagon and my dad had the number,” she says.
“This was the ‘50s, this was the Cold War, and he would have been the first one to know if there was an attack on the United States,” Rick says.
The red phone rang one day in December 1955, and Shoup answered it, Pam says. “And then there was a small voice that just asked, ‘Is this Santa Claus?’ ”
His children remember Shoup as straight-laced and disciplined, and he was annoyed and upset by the call and thought it was a joke — but then, Terri says, the little voice started crying.
“And Dad realized that it wasn’t a joke,” her sister says. “So he talked to him, ho-ho-ho’d and asked if he had been a good boy and, ‘May I talk to your mother?’ And the mother got on and said, ‘You haven’t seen the paper yet? There’s a phone number to call Santa. It’s in the Sears ad.’ Dad looked it up, and there it was, his red phone number. And they had children calling one after another, so he put a couple of airmen on the phones to act like Santa Claus.”
“It got to be a big joke at the command center. You know, ‘The old man’s really flipped his lid this time. We’re answering Santa calls,’ ” Terri says.
And then, it got better.
“The airmen had this big glass board with the United States on it and Canada, and when airplanes would come in they would track them,” Pam says.
“And Christmas Eve of 1955, when Dad walked in, there was a drawing of a sleigh with eight reindeer coming over the North Pole,” Rick says.
“Dad said, ‘What is that?’ They say, ‘Colonel, we’re sorry. We were just making a joke. Do you want us to take that down?’ Dad looked at it for a while, and next thing you know, Dad had called the radio station and had said, ‘This is the commander at the Combat Alert Center, and we have an unidentified flying object. Why, it looks like a sleigh.’ Well, the radio stations would call him like every hour and say, ‘Where’s Santa now?’ ” Terri says.
For real.
“And later in life he got letters from all over the world, people saying, ‘Thank you, Colonel,’ for having, you know, this sense of humor. And in his 90s, he would carry those letters around with him in a briefcase that had a lock on it like it was top-secret information,” she says. “You know, he was an important guy, but this is the thing he’s known for.”
“Yeah,” Rick [his son] says, “it’s probably the thing he was proudest of, too.”
So yeah. I think that might be the best wrong number of all time.
Source: http://www.npr.org/2014/12/19/371647099/norads-santa-tracker-began-with-a-typo-and-a-good-sport
OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS.
I’ve seen the first post a bunch of times, but never the story of How The Santa Tracker Started.
2022 smells like success, healing, transformation, blessings and self love.
EVERYTHING COMES TO YOU, AT THE RIGHT TIME
reblog the Don Draper of getting a job he’s unqualified for and you’ll have 10 years of getting jobs you’re unqualified for
No but my dad actually did this at McDonalds in the 70s!
So here’s a true story: my father, sometime in the 70s was looking for his first job. He went to the local McDonalds and told the staff, [manager’s name] said I was supposed to start today. They took his word for it and started training him and by the time the manager saw him and asked who he was, people just said “oh that’s the new guy.”
Somehow this actually worked. My dad worked there for a couple of years as a cook. He even won an award plaque which he had on the wall until the day he died.
Confidence Helps
Me, walking into FBI Headquarters:
“Name’s Burt Macklin, I work here now.”
You can’t let this be lost in the tags
you have been visited by the seven magic dragon balls your biggest wish will be granted but only if you reblog
Couldn’t risk it.
didn’t realize they change colors. now I know o gotta wish.
THIS SHIT IS REAL I GOT THE JOB I WAS NUTS ABOUT BC I REBLOGGED THIS YESTERDAY maybe it’s a coinkidink but it okay just take the necessary steps to achieve what you’re wishing for and YOU CAN DO IT