tbh the best way that i explain to other people what it feels like to live with an anxiety disorder is the one time when i had to get a fingerprint and background check done for a job and i, someone who has never received so much as a speeding ticket my whole life, spent thirty minutes panicking that i would fail because i might secretly be a criminal and have no idea
Me seeing this for the 14th time in my 5 years on tumblr and seeing more notes and comments but still reblogging it since it’s literally a World Heritage Post
Okay but like iced tea, iced coffee and chocolate milk aren’t a solely American thing tho, I live in Europe and I can say I had all three of those today. So I don’t know what kinda crack England be on but you do you boo. Oh and I do no plenty of English people who do drink atleast one of those so please don’t feel attacked.
the echo (or the answer) - a werewolf au (Jake "Hangman" Seresin x OC)
Summary: The moon is beautiful and full - the wolf packs are filled with an insatiable hunger and a need to hunt. Only Jake's hunger isn't for food.
Pairing: Alpha!Jake Seresin x Human!OC (Ronnie Bradshaw)
Word Count: 9007
Warnings: language, flashbacks, violence, blood/gore mention, alpha!jake being protective and soft, werewolf bob, slight love triangle
TWO | THREE | FOUR
-> likes are great but comments/reblogs are even better!
-> thank you to my werewolf love @blue-aconite for reading this over for me and talking werewolves with me always
-> i highly recommend listening to Running with the Wolves by AURORA while reading this chapter, really adds to the experience in my humble opinion
Blue River stood on the edge of a knife. On a presipice, looking over the edge with only thoughts of jumping circling their brains. The first full moon since Red Sky was forced into their territory was tonight, and Bradley feared the worst.
All out war. Or something even more terrible: his beloved sister being used against him.
Ronnie walked into the pack house, a dingy little cabin in the middle of the woods that was nearly impossible to get to if you didn’t know the way, and immediately dropped her overnight bag on the floor. It had only been a few full moons since the last time she had gotten out there, and it was a disaster. Furniture overturned, bottles everywhere. It was like a drifter or a group of wild teenagers had gotten in and done a number on the place.
“What the fuck, Brad?” she asked, turning to her brother as he stepped into the space beside her, giving him a look.
He scratched the back of his neck. “Yeah…I know. It needs a once over.”
“Ya think?” she questioned back as she scooped up her bag again. “Are the sheets even clean on the bed back there?”
She pointed to the door that led to the only other room off of the main one. A bedroom for wolves to crash in when it was a particularly rough full moon — typically their first. She remembered after Bob’s first full moon she walked in to the mattress torn in half and foam scattered all over the floor. Bob laying in the middle of the chaos fast asleep. Luckily, they had gotten a new mattress since then.
“Yes, there’s clean sheets and spare blankets,” he said, quickly righting the chairs around the small dining table and picking up a few of the bottles.
Ronnie sighed as she opened the door to the bedroom. He wasn’t lying. There was a set of new flannel sheets already on the bed and a tall stack of blankets set precariously on the end. Bradley knew how cold she got at night, and staying in a cabin with no heat in Washington was basically a death sentence to Ronnie. She threw her bag down on the bed and came back out to the main room to find Bradley setting down a handful of glass bottles on the kitchen counter.
“Don’t worry about it,” she sighed, stopping him from cleaning up more. “It’ll give me something to do.”
“Bob can help you.”
He jabbed his thumb over his shoulder. Ronnie could see, through the front window, the wolf in question standing there talking to Natasha with his arms crossed and lips pressed into a thin line. He pushed up his tortoise shell glasses as he spoke. She and Bob got along fine. He was quiet, blended into the background when the pack was together. Preferring to observe rather than participate. Sticking to the fringes where Ronnie always seemed to end up. But when he did speak it was usually something important, dangerously witty, or spoken just for her to hear. A secret for them to share. Anytime she spoke to him it was nice. Comfortable. Easy.
She knew why Bradley picked him to stay with her tonight. To keep guard around the pack house in case some Red Sky wolves showed up. He would say it was because Bob was the biggest wolf out of all of them. His shoulder standing at six foot four inches, making him a head larger than even Bradley. A tank that could easily take a large number on. But she could see her brother’s other motives behind it. The look he would get anytime he saw them talking to one another. The way he would whisper in Bob’s ear, both of their eyes constantly darting over to her, making the other wolf blush a pretty shade of pink.
Beyond that door was safety, comfort, maybe even love if she tried. That door was expected, unlocked, encouraged for her to walk through. But was it a door she even wanted to open? Maybe, two months ago, she would’ve dared. She would’ve tried. But now there was another option that no one even knew of. That door was dangerous, locked, forbidden. Beyond that door was hurt, betrayal, and risk. But did she want to open that door, either?
“Ronnie, wait up!” Bradley called as he fell behind on the trail.
She shouted over her shoulder, “You are literally a supernatural being — I think you can keep up with your merely human sister on a hike!”
“You know I hate hiking!” he yelled back even as she continued to charge ahead, maybe even on purpose.
“You’re the one who insisted on joining me!”
She was trying not to be frustrated, really, she was. But for the past week she barely got a single moment alone. Natasha tagged along with her to and from work. She was escorted to the grocery store, the post office, the library — everywhere. Even at night she could hear the extra wolves roaming around downstairs, letting her know she wasn’t truly alone. Ronnie never even realized how many things she was used to doing by herself until suddenly she wasn’t.
And now, her most sacred of activities was tainted by the presence of someone else. The familiar trails she liked to tred, memorized since her youth, were ruined by her brother’s complaining.
For being a werewolf, Bradley really did hate hiking. He said it was tedious and he spent enough time in the woods already. But Ronnie always saw it as a solace. A way to connect to nature around her and maybe feel something close to what the pack did when they ran through the woods on the night of the full moon. She would bring books and picnic lunches — knowing all the good spots around town with comfy grass and rocks as big as tables.
Today, she was trying to go to her favorite place for some reading and charcuterie. A grass bald not too far up the small mountain that lined the edge of Marnmouth. Her great-grandmother’s journal practically burning a hole in her backpack, hopefully some nugget of information about human-werewolf mating just waiting to be found. But as soon as she put on her backpack and hiking boots, Bradley insisted that he go with her. He tried to make it seem like he just wanted to spend time with her, for her own benefit, but she knew his ulterior motive.
“Ronnie!”
She continued on ahead despite his calls for her to slow down. She just needed a moment. One goddamn moment to herself before she lost her entire mind. Bradley’s voice faded into a distant murmur as she broke through the tree line and out onto the bald. A patch of grass with no tree coverage that overlooked Marnmouth below. It was a spectacular view, one that she could never get enough of.
But her heart lept into her throat when she saw the Red Sky Alpha standing in the middle of the patch of grass, his chest heaving like he just ran for miles.
Ronnie looked over her shoulder to see if Bradley was anywhere close to catching up, then she jogged over to him — her legs burning from the uphill climb.
“What the hell are you doing here?” she whispered loudly once she was close enough.
“I’m sorry,” he panted, looking over every inch of her. “I couldn’t help it. The urge is…”
She knew what he was talking about. She hadn’t seen him since that encounter on the beach, almost a week ago. The longer they stayed apart, the stronger his urge to be with her would get. He looked like someone had stabbed him in the gut as he took a step closer to her.
“My brother is right behind me,” she warned.
“Even a moment with you is better than nothing at all.”
Her eyes slipped shut of their own accord as his fingers trailed along the edge of her jaw. The sigh Jake released was like he had been holding something in for years. He tugged her just that step closer as he cupped her cheek completely. She leaned into his touch, a contented sort of noise slipping past her lips. It was relief after days of agitation, longing, and fear. She felt his forehead bump her own, the tickle of his scruffy beard against her chin.
And then he was gone.
Ronnie moved over to the dining table and brushed off the thick layer of dust — finding it easier to speak when she wasn’t looking at Bradley.
“I still don’t see why you moved me out here. Red Sky is clearly unpredictable but they aren’t stupid enough to make a move on a house in the middle of town where people could see.”
“Ronnie,” he groaned her name, frustrated and annoyed.
They had had this conversation several times already. An Alpha for three months and people questioning him was already a foreign concept. Even though Ronnie had been questioning everything her entire life. Always digging, always searching, always wanting to know more. Even their father, an Alpha for twenty years, took her questioning him in stride. Because he always understood better than anyone why she did what she did. It seemed that Bradley never did.
“What? What?” She rounded on him now. “You didn’t even ask for my opinion before you decided this was the best course of action!”
“Because it is the best course of action! Here, we can keep you safe. Here, someone can stay with you. Here, I feel like I have some control.”
Her face was pinched, tugged, pained in something between anger and sorrow. “Control over what exactly? Me?”
Bradley rolled his eyes. “You know that’s not what I meant.”
“Sure as hell seems like it,” she muttered under her breath as she turned back to the table, wiping off more crumbs and dust to be swept away later, trying to distract herself from this terrible conversation.
“You’re not a kid anymore, Ronnie, don’t act like that,” he said.
She turned back to her brother slowly, eyes wide and top lip twitching in the effort not to snarl. Her next words came out in a hiss so they wouldn’t be a scream. “Exactly. I’m not a kid anymore, so I should get to choose where I’m held prisoner for the night.”
“You are a member of this pack, and it’s my responsibility — “
“Am I?” she questioned, her chest heaving, eyes stinging with unshed tears.
Bradley had the decency to look like she had just slapped him across the face. Mouth popped open in surprise and eyes, teetering on the edge between brown and red, wide in some kind of sudden realization. Ronnie shook her head before she looked down at her boots, unable to keep looking at him with all that she felt. She couldn’t really tell what hurt more. His inability to just trust her or the fact that he thought she felt like she belonged her entire life.
“You sure you don’t want me to come inside with you?” Pete asked as he pulled his truck into the grocery store parking lot.
Ronnie sighed, fingers rubbing at her temples. “Yes. I’m sure.”
“Look — “ Pete cut the engine on the truck. “I know this hasn’t been easy. But, we just wanna keep you safe.”
“And I just want five minutes of relative peace,” she snarked back, instantly regretting it with a suck of her teeth. “Sorry…I — sorry.”
Pete patted her leg with a closed mouth smile. “S’okay, kid. I get it. I won’t tell about your thirty minutes of freedom if you don’t.”
Pete always had been understanding and perseptive. Her father’s best friend and an easy choice for his second — and now Bradley’s. He always seemed to notice and he always seemed to care. Bringing Ronnie into conversations and suggesting that her knowledge be tapped before a decision was made. It was always subtle and he always threw a wink her way when no one was looking. Pete always found a way to make her feel seen. Especially now that her father was gone.
Ronnie grinned appreciatively and leaned over the center consol to kiss his cheek. “Thank you, Pete.”
He just smiled, watching as she hopped down from the truck and retrieved her reusable bags from the back. There was nearly a skip in her step as she crossed the rain slicked parking lot and entered the store. She loaded her bags into a cart, popped in her headphones, put on a podcast, and started making her rounds through the aisles. It felt like pure bliss in comparison to the near stifling presence of the pack since Red Sky arrived.
She knew they were only doing what they thought was right. They feared for her life, for her safety. She was vulnerable and would be an easy target to weaken the pack’s moral. But their constant hovering was made all the more difficult to bare when she knew that Red Sky would never try to go after her.
Not when she was mated to their Alpha.
She sighed heavily at the thought. And something turned in her gut. A longing, a yearning, a pull. She had only seen him once since their encounter on the beach. Those few stolen moments in the woods with Bradley right behind them. His touch lingered on her skin for hours afterward. She swore she could even feel it now, nearly a week removed, as she looked over the cereal options.
Then she felt something, down at the very core of her being. An instinct. A call. He was there. She couldn’t help the way her heart trilled at the thought, the way her stomach filled with the flutters of butterflies. Her eyes swept from left to right, up and down the aisle, to see if he was there.
But he wasn’t.
She went back to looking at the cereal, deciding to just go with the sugary junk she usually got instead of the healthy option that tried to tempt her each and every time. Fighting down the swirling mix of excitement and disappointment that filled her chest cavity. She dropped the chosen box into the cart, checking the item off her list, and when she looked back up…
Jake was there.
Her breath hitched in her throat. He swallowed thick as he approached her, his hands nearly trembled at his sides. Stopping right in front of her, toe to toe, she couldn’t help but think he even looked good in the ugly florescent lighting of the local grocery. Long hair sandy and dark at the root, green eyes intense, corduroy and flannel stretched over his broad shoulders.
“What happened to staying away from me?” she asked quietly.
He scoffed, though there was no real bite behind it. It was light, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Trust me, little one, I’m trying. I — I can’t help it.”
“Someone could see,” she said, eyes darting up and down the aisle to see if anyone had noticed them, if there was anyone she recognized.
The cereal aisle remained empty as Jake brushed his fingers against her own, a breath leaving him like a balm was finally placed on his aching blisters. There was a relief inside her too. One that she didn’t even really know she needed. At his touch, everything inside her calmed. Everything seemed not so bad. Instead of feeling vulnerable and like an outsider, she felt protected — like she belonged.
“Please,” he spoke softly as he took her hand. “I need you.”
She relented. It scared her how easy it was to do. All she wanted for the past month was to be left alone, to have a bit of peace and quiet. But now…Now the Red Sky Alpha was following her around the store and she couldn’t be happier. She couldn’t help the joy that filled her chest as they meandered through the aisles, his hands finding their way onto her body any chance they got. As she stood there trying to find the best looking squash, his fingers found their home on her hips. As they walked through the deli, his hand was shoved into her back jean pocket. Some of the locals, people who had watched her grow up, gave her either looks of approval or looks of bewilderment as they passed the pair by.
They didn’t talk much. There really was no need to. This was a stolen moment in time. Forbidden fruit. Why waste a single breath on words when those stolen touches and looks said all they needed to?
I’m scared to be parted from you. I’m scared to fall in love with you.
By the time her shopping was complete and she got to the checkout line, he was gone.
The front door creaked open and Pete popped his head inside, “Everything okay in here?”
Bradley opened his mouth to say something, not taking his eyes off his sister, but she smiled at Pete and spoke before he could, “Yeah. Everything’s good. I’m all set.”
“Alright.” She could tell Pete didn’t believe her, but he was never one to push. “Come on, Bradley, we gotta go. Sun’s getting low.”
“Yeah, coming.” He stared at Ronnie as he spoke, hands on his hips and eyes glaring.
She glared right back until he turned and walked out the door. Then she turned back towards the mess of the main room and began to furiously pick up the trash the pack had left behind. Yanking bottles off the floor and practically tossing them onto the kitchen counter. It was a distraction, but the more she cleaned the angier she became.
Why couldn’t he just trust her? Why did the things that should feel and once felt right now feel wrong? Why did she always have to be an outsider? Why did everything have to be so fucking complicated?
The front door came open with a shriek and Ronnie jumped, her heart instantly racing as adrenaline flooded her veins. But when she turned, it was only Bob — shouldering the door open as he brought in firewood from the pile outside.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” he chuckled nervously as he let the door slam shut behind him. “Bradley said you get cold at night, so I thought…Just in case.”
Her expression softened, her heart slowing, as she watched him set the logs by the stone fireplace. The little cabin was too far out in the wilderness for there to be any sort of electricity, or gas, or even cellular signal. Bob’s thoughtfulness touched her as he put in some paper and twigs for kindling, setting it ablaze with the lighter from his pocket. Once it was bright enough, he added a few logs and stepped away. Ronnie bit her lip, closed her eyes against the twisting feeling in her stomach. Like she was being pulled two different ways. Bob would be good to her. He would be.
“Thanks, Bobby.”
“No problem.” He smiled softly, rubbing at the back of his neck that was turning a light shade of red.
“We have a few hours till sundown — wanna help me clean this place up?”
“Sure.”
Bob held open a trashbag as Ronnie dropped all the bottles and other pieces of trash inside. They both swept, chuckling at the absolutely massive hairballs they found behind the tattered couch. He joked that it was mostly his and she laughed again — his blush obvious and furious. He set the heavy and full trashbag just outside the front door, a reminder for someone in the morning to take it into town. Ronnie found Pete’s old CD player, the batteries surprisingly still good, and put on some tunes. Some old Willie Nelson that had them both judging Pete hard but also infectuously dancing. And just like any other time she spent in Bob’s company, Ronnie felt happy. Comfortable. He made sure to listen and ask for her thoughts. He took the time to collect firewood for her and ask if she ate — willing to sacrifice the snacks he had brought with him for when morning came.
It felt right to be with him. Responsible. Reasonable. But was it what she truly wanted?
“I’m sorry you have to do this,” Ronnie said as she finished sweeping the last of the dirt out onto the front porch.
“Why?” he asked back, eyebrows furrowed in a nearly adorable way as he flipped through the two other CDs they were able to locate: both more Willie Nelson.
“I know that being away from the pack during the full moon doesn’t…” She struggled to find the right words as she leaned the broom against the wall. “Feel great for you guys. I think Harvey Sawyer, a wolf in the pack from years ago, described it like he was missing a limb and knew exactly where it was — but he couldn’t get to it.”
“That sounds…Like a fun time,” Bob chuckled, pulling a face as he set down the CDs and pushed up his glasses. “You sure know a lot about werewolves, Ronnie.”
She smiled, tight lipped and not entirely genuinely. “Yeah. I try.”
Bob, ever hesitant and considerate, was confident now as he took the few strides across the room to reach her. But she could see the nerves as he got closer. The bob of his throat, the pink tinge of his cheeks. Yet he powered through, tentatively reaching for her hand. And when she didn’t stop him, he took it completely in his own.
“Either way…” he said, catching her gaze with a small smile. “I don’t mind bein’ here with you.”
Ronnie opened her mouth to respond, unsure of anything to say — unsure even of what she was feeling. Then, suddenly, a wolf howled in the distance. Bob’s usually blue eyes like the sea flashed in Beta gold. That was Bradley’s howl, calling the pack to hunt. They both looked to the front window and sure enough the sun had set. Pretty soon, Bob’s transformation would be unstoppable.
He gave her hand a squeeze before he let go. “I’ll be outside all night — patrolling not too far beyond the treeline. Come get me if you need anything, okay?”
“Not sure what you’re gonna be able to do if I run out of toilet paper, but alright,” she joked, if only to lighten the heaviness in her heart, and he laughed.
“See you in the morning,” he chuckled.
Bob hesitated for only a moment, then he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek. Before she could say or even do anything he turned on his heel and went out the door. As he retreated, she could just make out the blazing blush on his neck.
Once the door was closed, Ronnie touched the spot where he had kissed her. Her mind reeling. Bob was kind. Reserved. Attentive. Laughed at her terrible jokes. Respected the knowledge that she had worked so hard to gain. And he was so good. Maybe too good. He made her feel safe and seen and maybe even loved if she tried.
But he wasn’t who the Moon Goddess had hand picked for her. He wasn’t her mate. And maybe if she didn’t already have one, this would be an easy decision to make. An obvious one. But she was mated to somebody else. She was mated to Jake.
A man she barely knew. A man she didn’t know was kind or not. A man she had never told a joke to. But he respected her all the same. Took her advice to heart. He even, despite everything about his nature and the way it was sure to hurt him, kept his distance from her. That had to mean there was something good there, too, right? That he wasn’t just his first impressions: cocky, arrogant, and reckless? Anytime she was even near him she felt protected, like nothing bad was ever going to happen as long as he was around. With him, she felt like she belonged somewhere, because some part of him was always going to be bound to her. With him, her heart stopped and went hundreds of miles per hour all at the same time.
Ronnie dropped down onto the couch, sending dust particles everywhere, and placed her head in her hands.
What the hell was she supposed to do?
The sun set swiftly on full moon nights in Marnmouth, Washington. Soon, Ronnie was in bed. A candle her only source of light as she tried to distract herself from, well, everything, with her great-grandmother’s journal.
Georgiana “Gigi” Janson-Bradshaw. The reason Ronnie was only human. The woman was not very descriptive. Most of her entries were only about three sentences long. But when Ronnie flipped through the journal originally, she found that she had entered something every day for ten years. A year into the journal’s scribblings was when she was supposed to meet her husband, Isaiah. There had to be something, in all that time. Something that would be helpful, that would maybe help Ronnie understand what she was supposed to do.
Ronnie turned another page with a sigh. So far nothing. Just a few entries ago Gigi met Isaiah for the first time, so hopefully she was getting to the good stuff.
All those old stories about Marnmouth’s founder, Augustine Bradshaw, are true, Gigi wrote, and Ronnie sat up a bit straighter, angling the candle closer to the page so she could see better.
Werewolves are real. I can hardly believe it. But it’s true. Isaiah flashed his eyes at me. They turned red like something awful. Then he told me that we were bonded — bound to one another by some spirit or god that they don’t talk about in church. It scared me at first. But I can’t deny that I feel drawn to him. I can’t really explain it. The full moon is tonight. I just heard a wolf howl…Somehow I know that it is Isaiah calling for me.
Just then, an echoing howl sounded in the distance — drawn out and surreal. Ronnie jumped, singeing the corner of the journal’s page. For only a moment, she thought it was just Bob. Melancholy and lonely without his pack. But then she felt it. An understanding beyond reasoning and beyond doubt.
It was Jake. Calling for her.
Taking up the candle, she rose from bed and went to the window that looked out on the dense forest behind the pack house. Through the darkness and the trees she could see a pair of glowing red eyes, staring at her. She shuddered at the sight, at the feeling of being watched. Jake howled again — so loud it nearly rattled the window. Ronnie put a hand to the cold glass in order to stop herself from jumping right through it.
He needed to leave before Bob caught wind of him. But it wasn’t just a concern for his safety that had her slipping her jeans and shoes back on, opening the window and slipping outside. His scent was strong due to the full moon. She could feel it everywhere. The pull to him powerful now that he had called her with his howl. She needed to be with him.
Even if it was the most idiotic idea on the planet.
Ronnie entered the woods easily, the moon her only source of light as she picked her way over large roots, rocks, and fallen logs. Jake was a good distance away, far enough from Bob’s patrol root of the house and down wind so his scent wouldn’t be noticed. Ronnie gasped in awe at the sight of him in wolf form.
She had seen full wolf forms all her life. They were nothing new. Giant wolves the size of cars and trucks, paws as big as her torso and heads nearly the size of her entire body. Each one unique to the person hidden inside during the full moon. She loved seeing new wolf transformations for the first time, just to see how their inner wolf looked. Bob’s had probably been the most surprising — little timid, docile Bob being the biggest wolf in the pack was certainly a shock — but Jake’s now took the prize. He was beautiful. He was slightly smaller than Bradley’s wolf form, but she could see, as she approached, the strong muscle hidden beneath his fur. And his fur. In the moonlight it sparkled like gold. Soft and long. It made his eyes appear like rubies set in an ancient statue set to guard a temple to the Moon Goddess herself.
“Jake…” she whispered as she stopped before him.
He closed the distance between them, nudging her hand with his nose. She smiled as she ran her hand up the space between his eyes to the top of his head. His fur was as soft as it looked. His ears perked up happily.
“You shouldn’t be here,” she told him, even as she allowed him to press his face into her middle. “Brad’s got his biggest wolf guarding me tonight, if we get caught…”
It wasn’t him getting caught. It was them. The two of them. Together. She didn’t understand the implications nor want to.
Jake nudged her hand again. Then he turned, showing her his flank, and lowered himself down onto the forest floor. His blood red eyes looked at her expectantly.
She understood immediately, backing away slightly. “I can’t go with you. Are you insane?”
He just continued to stare at her. Eyes nearly unblinking. She felt something then at the very end of herself. A draw, a call, a nudge. Like she could almost hear his voice inside her head:
Come on, little one. Run with me.
Barely even aware of her own actions, the last logical part of herself screaming at her to stop, she approached him again. Grabbing hold of his fur, she pulled herself onto his back. Once she was situated, each hand fisted around his soft golden fur to keep her steady, he rose from the ground. She could feel his heart beating between her legs, strong and true. And as he looked back over his shoulder at her one last time, she knew there was no going back.
He took off into the woods. Ronnie lowered herself down on his back to avoid the wind resistance and any low hanging branches. The wind made her eyes water, froze her down to the bone, wiped her dark hair back in a torrent. But she couldn’t resist, control, the laugh that bubbled up her throat as they ran through the trees. This was complete and utter joy. The full moon shining down on them, the trees standing as ancient centurians. They lept over fallen logs, splashed through streams, curved around hillsides.
As they ran, it felt like there was some thing connecting them together. Not just the mating, but some bond, some vow unbreakable. Like a golden thread tied around each of their hearts and souls, holding them together and not easily cut. It was nearly like she was one with Jake. Two wolves running one and the same.
Is this what it felt like each full moon? Connected to the pack in a way uneasily explained. Completely free, completely satisfied, completely whole.
They came upon a small clearing and Jake slowed to a stop. A fog was rolling in from the mountain top, catching the light and casting gross shadows with the trees. Ronnie instantly tensed. There were other wolves there. Red Sky wolves. She didn’t recognize any of the forms. At Jake’s signal, she slid down from his back and onto her feet.
The other wolves stared at her, and the only thing she could think to do was stare back. But she wasn’t scared. No. Jake was with her. She was safe.
An older wolf, judging from the grey hairs around his snout and eyes, snarled at her. Jake stamped his foot and growled back. She could only assume what they were talking about. In wolf form, werewolves communicated through their minds. Talking to each other inside their own heads. But to anyone else it just looked like a lot of yipping and growling.
But it was easy enough to see that they were arguing about her. A human affiliated with Blue River being amongst their pack was not great for them, logically. Her scent could bring the other pack right to them and start a fight they weren’t prepared for. She prayed that didn’t happen as well. She hadn’t realized how small Red Sky was until this moment, either. Blue River was nearly double the size.
A small pack was a bad sign. A problem Jake most likely inherited from Jeremiah Bellmoral. It was a sign that the pack was poorly led, or that the Alpha was not in the Moon Goddesses favor, or worse, that the Alpha was drunk on their own power. And from what Jake told her about Bellmoral, she wasn’t at all surprised. She hoped that Bellmoral was just a bad leader and that he hadn’t killed any of his Betas when he felt threatened. The thought alone turned her stomach.
Suddenly, the entirety of Red Sky was barking and yipping at one another. Growls and stamps exchanged between them. Jake appeared to be trying to bring everyone under control. And through all the chaos, the older wolf in the pack was slowly approaching Ronnie. She backed up against the tree behind her, trying not to show any of the fear that was clawing its way up her throat — ready to be released in a scream or a whimper, she wasn’t entirely sure. But before the wolf could even get close enough Jake stepped in between them, his low growl making the other wolves in the pack whimper and quiet down. Her chest heaved with relief as she watched the golden fur on his neck glimmer in the moonlight.
There was no need for fear. There wasn’t room for it when a golden thread tugged at her heart.
Jake turned to her then, nuzzling his face into the side of her head. She reached up and petted his cheek.
“I’m okay,” she assured, keeping her eye on the wolf that threatened her with what she hoped to be an intense look in her eye.
Jake looked out over the pack one last time, then turned to Ronnie and got down on the ground once more. She knew what it meant. Climbing on with ease, she hunkered down just in time for him to take off — the pack following behind them.
It was different once the pack was with them. It was as if the golden thread spread, went out to each heart that ran beside them in a v formation through the woods. Ronnie had never felt so connected to something in her entire life. Now, it wasn’t just the stinging wind that made tears stream down her face.
She finally felt like she belonged.
Red Sky ran for hours or minutes Ronnie couldn’t tell. She watched the trees go by, wolves break off from the formation to hunt any poor creature that passed them, the way Jake breathed and moved beneath her. She could barely feel the cold against her bare arms or her hair as it whipped behind her.
But suddenly, Jake slid to a stop. His nose upturned and nostrils working furiously at some foreign scent. Ronnie had a feeling what that scent could be.
Blue River. Her brother. Her family. She was sure that Jake had taken them to the northern part of the Marnmouth territory, meaning the rival pack was supposed to be on the complete opposite side of the forest. But it seemed that Bradley had plans to seek Red Sky out tonight. Or worse, he knew that Ronnie was with them.
Her heart dropped into her stomach as Jake urged her to get off his back. On her feet, he nudged her over to crouch behind a rotten log and a thick curtain of ferns. She pressed her forehead into the space between his giant red eyes, a shuddering breath slipping past her lips.
“Come back,” she whispered.
Jake moved away from her then and she dropped down onto the leaf strewn ground completely. Leaning back against the rotten log, she prayed that she wasn’t the reason for this encounter. That she wouldn’t get spotted, that Bradley had no idea she was there and wouldn’t sense that she was there. A few minutes later, she heard the fight begin. Snarling and howling and echoing barks that made her flinch. She clamped a hand over her mouth to keep in the scared noises that she dared to make as the fight drew closer to her hiding spot. She could now hear the snapping of teeth, thudding as massive bodies hit the ground, the yelps of the wounded.
There was no fear for her own safety now. For her own life. She feared for Jake — for Red Sky. For wolves she didn’t know fighting what she considered her family. Guilt flared in her stomach. She shouldn’t be thinking that way. Blue River was her pack. Not Red Sky. But she felt connected to that rival pack in a way she never did to the one she was raised in. With Blue River, she was always going to be on the outside looking in. She was a Bradshaw, descended from a great line of werewolf royalty — but she was only human.
With Red Sky, there was a chance at belonging.
Eventually, the fighting stopped. The losers retreating with their tails tucked to lick their wounds. The winners heading off knowing that they were on top, that they were in charge. So it wasn’t her scent that had drawn Blue River to them. If that were the case she would’ve been found by now, Bradley’s chocolate brown face looking down at her with such sheer disappointment and horror. But instead the other pack simply left, leaving her be. At the silence, only broken by soft, heart-wrenching whimpers, Ronnie dared to peek out over the top of the log.
Red Sky were clearly the losers today. Several of the wolves were limping. All of them were bleeding from somewhere. Ronnie spotted Jake immediately. He was helping the older wolf that had threatened her earlier back to his feet. Nudging gently at his shoulder with his snout.
On some instinct she couldn’t explain, some urge to help, Ronnie hopped over the log and joined in the effort to get him to his feet. She got on the wolf’s other side and gently pushed at his shoulder. He was badly wounded. His neck matted down by blood, a deep gash evident and sparkling in the moon light. He tried to get to his feet, but fell back down with a huff. Ronnie put all her weight into it as he tried again.
“Come on, old timer,” she encouraged, “There’s some fight in you yet.”
She could nearly hear his laugh, hidden somewhere in his wolfy throat, as he finally got steady on his feet.
She chuckled too as she patted his flank. “There we go.”
The older wolf limped off towards the rest of the pack, who had gathered to attend to each other’s wounds as best they could till morning. Jake stood on the other side, watching Ronnie carefully. She smiled shyly at him. He didn’t appear to be injured, save for a claw mark across his face. She wondered if her brother gave that to him.
Jake told her to climb on his back one last time. And she did. No hesitation. He took off into the woods again, heading back in the direction of the pack house. But he stopped at a clearing she knew well — only a mile away from the cabin. She slid off again and Jake settled onto the ground, looking at her expectantly.
She knew what he wanted, but hesitated now. “I-I really should get back.”
He only sprawled out some more in response and she laughed with a roll of her eyes
She relented. It scared her how easy it was to do. Yes, she still feared being caught. Having to truly face what any of this meant. But once seh laid down on the soft earth beside Jake, none of that really mattered. It was like swimming in an ocean of him. Fathoms deep with no chance of coming up for air. But she didn’t fear drowning. She feared leaving the depths of him now. Surrounded, all encompassed, entangled in him completely. His warmth, his scent, the beating of his heart in her ear. Everything was Jake and everything was good. This, felt like home. Like true peace. Like love and light and something just beyond understanding.
How could fear possibly matter when she was finally where she was supposed to be?
“M’sorry about what happened,” she whispered, resting her head on one of his forelimbs, the other laid on top of her middle.
Jake made a noise in the back of his throat. She didn’t understand it, but she understood it enough.
“I really thought he would just stick to the usual route…But apparently you made him feel threatened enough that he needed to start a fight.”
She could nearly hear his response this time: Damn right he should feel threatened. Ronnie laughed, fingers playing with the long fur on his chest.
“I-I didn’t realize your pack was so…Small.” She felt Jake tense around her. “Did Jeremiah Bellmoral do that?”
He nodded — she felt it more than saw it.
“Did…Did he…?”
She could barely get out the question. It was so rare, so taboo, so immoral and terrible that she didn’t even like to think about that happening just so close to home. When maybe her family could have helped.
Swallowing thick, she tried again, “Did he kill…?”
She still couldn’t get it out. But she didn’t have to. The way Jake went stiff was answer enough. A chill went down her spine as she burrowed further into him. That was why Jake challenged him. To save his pack from further destruction. God, they could have came to Blue River for help. But would her father have listened?
Yes. Nick Bradshaw was a kind, understanding man. Experienced and well versed in their history. He would have known what to do. Maybe he would’ve killed Bellmoral himself and merged the packs after years and years of senseless feuding. Maybe then everything would be easier. But they were well past that point now. Bellmoral was dead, Jake was the new Alpha of a small and traumatized pack, and to make matters worse: they were forced into the territory of a rival pack, also led by a new Alpha, that was stronger than them.
So was it a blessing or a curse that Jake and Ronnie were mated? Was it just another item on Jake’s long list of things gone wrong? Or was it a solace amongst a terrible storm — a lighthouse guiding him home?
It felt closer to solace as Ronnie wrapped her arms around his large neck and pulled him as close as she could get.
“Oh, Jake,” she whispered.
He tucked his chin into her shoulder, a soft whine echoing in the back of his throat. She clutched him tighter, trying to imbue him with some of her strength — measly as it was. Trying to tell him all that she couldn’t with words.
I’m scared to be parted from you. I’m scared to fall in love with you.
It was the kind of rest that had been evading Ronnie for weeks. Peaceful, deep, and uninterrupted by strange dreams of glowing red eyes and hands on skin. And she was pulled from it slowly, like when she was a child and her dad was carrying her inside from the backseat of the car. All lazy smiles and thoughts of just rolling over and going back to sleep.
But then she felt a cold, a wetness beneath her and the spell was broken.
It occurred to her that it smelled like forest. Wet leaves and pine. Then she smelled something stronger, citrus and bonfires. This scent calmed her, told her not to worry. She tried to push herself deeper into the feeling, get lost in it. Just to get a few more minutes of sleep.
Then she felt a rumble at her back, something tighten around her stomach. Something wet, like a kiss, against her neck.
Her eyes cracked open at this, confusion pulling at her brow. She was looking out at trees, bathed in early morning sunlight. Then she looked down, and there was an arm wrapped around her waist. She ran her fingers along the fabric of the cream thermal shirt they wore, the soft skin and hair wrapped around chorded muscle at the forearm, the hand that clutched posessively at her ribs.
She was rolled over onto her back, sleep still keeping her at the brink of understanding and consciousness. At first, it was the canopy of the forest and pale grey sky. But then Jake took over her field of vision and she smiled. His hair was messed, dangling over his forehead. There was a scar, a claw mark, coming down over his left eye and cheek. It would fade completely in only a few hours, but for now the white scar tissue stood out in stark contrast against his tanned skin.
Her fingertips reached and traced the lines on his cheek. Jake’s eyes slipped shut at the gentle, barely there touch.
Where did he get these from? Oh, right. Last night. Blue River and Red Sky had fought. She had run with the wolves. Laid down with Jake in the clearing.
It all snapped back to her like someone just clapped in her face. It wasn’t some beautiful and strange dream, it was real. Her eyes widened as she tried to sit up, to get her barings and think of something she could do.
But Jake shushed her, cupping her cheek in one of his large hands and holding her down with his weight. “Easy, little one, easy. You’re okay. You’re okay.”
“I stayed out all night,” she whispered, though her body relaxed beneath him, no longer tried to fight against his superior strength.
“I know,” he chuckled fondly, tucking her hair behind her ear.
“Oh, God,” she groaned, slapping her hands over her face in some childish attempt to hide from the situation she put herself in.
The pack was surely back at the house right now. They knew she wasn’t in her room — she left the window open for crying out loud. And Bob. Poor, sweet, Bob who didn’t deserve it was probably getting ripped an entire new asshole for letting this happen. They were going to be out looking for her. Each of them with her scent fresh in their noses and on the move.
She dragged her hands over her face, her palms naturally falling on Jake’s shoulders once they made their descent. The muscles in his arms, the tendons in his neck jumped like he was just barely holding back from something. A soft noise in the back of his throat made her toes curl as he leaned down closer to her.
His warm breath fanned her face and her mouth fell open, trying to drink it in. Jake’s face buckled like he was in pain as he pressed into her body further.
“I can’t — “ he started, his lips brushing her cheek, then he pulled back to look her in the eye. “I can’t stay away. It hurts to be parted from you and — and I can’t do it anymore. Ronnie, please.”
She had never heard an Alpha beg for anything before. But there Jake was, looking down at her with a broken, pleading gleam in his eyes as he searched her for any sign of hope. Of her ending his torture.
Ronnie struggled around the words, her tongue too heavy in her mouth. “We can’t…”
“Says who?” he asked, one hand trailing down the column of her throat, dipping into that space between her collarbones.
“Everyone,” she replied, first tears sticking to her lashes. “Everything.”
“I don’t care about everyone or everything.” His grip on her neck became just a touch more firm, his thumb under her chin forcing her to look up at him. “I care about you.”
“Jake…”
There were no more arguments. No more words that needed to be said. How could there be when those stolen looks and touches said everything already? Jake glanced down at her lips, a longing in his eyes that painters of old would only dream of capturing. Her chest heaved in anticipation, every nerve ending on fire as he drew nearer. Like the sea drawn to the moon so high, high up in the sky.
But just like that fated pair, they were never meant to meet.
Jake’s head whipped to the side, his ears picking up some sound that only a werewolf could. He quickly pulled away from her, drawing her to sit up with him by the hand.
“Your brother’s coming,” he grunted.
“Shit, shit, shit.” Ronnie scrambled to her feet, desperately pulling the leaves from her hair and adjusting her clothes so it didn’t look like she spent the entire night out in the woods.
Jake took her hand one last time and tugged her into his chest. One last reprieve before he had to be away from her again. His hands went into her hair, breathing her in as he set his forehead against her own.
She didn’t know what made her say it, but she did. “Meet me at the beach tomorrow — I’ll have my decision then.”
“Okay.”
He pressed his lips to her forehead, long and soft and filled with too much for Ronnie to even explain. She never wanted that moment to end. Standing in a clearing at dawn, held in the arms of someone she was on the cusp of loving.
But when she opened her eyes, he was gone.
“Shit,” she repeated one last time.
There was a pile of deer scat not too far away. The sounds of twigs snapping and gruffed arguments were drawing nearer. Ronnie bet, once they got close enough, they would be able to smell Jake all over her. Even she could smell it. Lingering in her hair, clothes, her very skin. She didn’t want to, but she needed to cover it up before they found her. So, she shoved her hands in the scat and rubbed it over one of her arms and up the side of her neck. The smell made her gag, but at least Jake’s scent was masked.
Bradley, Pete, and Bob broke through the tree line not a moment later.
“Ronnie!” Bradley called, relief evident in his tone.
She turned towards them, trying to act nonchalant as she smiled. “Oh, hey, guys!”
“Where the hell — ? Why — ?” Bradley couldn’t seem to decide what question he wanted to ask as the three of them stomped over to her.
Bradley just looked furious. Red faced and panting. Bob was blushing like a mad man, even in human form she could see his tail tucked between his legs from the scolding he surely received from his Alpha. And Pete — Pete looked like he was observing. His blue eyes trailed over Ronnie, the shit on her neck and clothes, the obvious wet stains on her side and back. He was calculating and coming to conclusions, and Ronnie really hoped he didn’t land somewhere near the truth.
“What’re you doing, Ronnie?” Pete finally asked when it was clear Bradley was too pissed off to formulate full sentences.
“I took a sunrise walk,” she lied easily.
Bob’s nose wrinkled in sudden realization. “Ugh, why do you smell terrible?”
“I slipped coming down the hill.” She pointed in the direction of the cabin, where she knew for a fact a small hill was located that she would have had to get down in order to be in that clearing. “Fell in deer shit…Thanks for reminding me.”
“And why didn’t you use the front door when you decided to go on your little walk this morning?” Pete questioned.
Ronnie sighed, not entirely fake aggravation slipping into her voice as she shrugged. “Because I wanted to be alone. I knew if I went through the front door…Bob would’ve found me and tried to come with. Sorry, Bobby.”
“S’alright,” the bespeckled wolf answered with an understanding nod.
“No, it’s not alright!” Bradley finally exclaimed, making a few birds high in the trees take off in flight. “You could’ve been attacked! Or captured!”
Ronnie opened her mouth to retaliate, to argue, to deliver some scathing remark about he was worrying for nothing — that he clearly showed Red Sky last night who was in charge even though he didn’t have to. But Ronnie held her tongue. So the truth of her whereabouts wouldn’t get out, but also because of the fear on Bradley’s face.
He was scared for her. He was always worried about her. And it made her heart soften enough to not continue bickering with him.
So she put her head down and muttered, “M’Sorry.”
“Come on, let’s go.” Bradley tilted his head towards Ronnie, then his Beta. “Bob.”
Bob jumped into action, desperate to do something right after this massive screwup that Ronnie caused. He took her by the shoulder and led her to follow Bradley and Pete back to the house. Bob put his hand flat between her shoulder blades as they walked.
His touch felt wrong now. Forbidden.
A tingle began at the base of her spine, forcing her to look over her shoulder and into the clearing one last time. Jake stood just beyond the pines, green eyes intense as he stared right back.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
CROSSING PATHS
Geralt of Rivia x OC. Rated E. Chapters 1-3 Posted. Word Count: 9626
Summary: Celia liked her life of solitude. She made do with healing and selling herbs in the village, until she does a favor for a friend and finds herself healing the mysterious Witcher. Geralt finds himself indebted to a rogue mage that he can’t seem to forget.
*Gif is not mine. All credit for the gif goes to the creator*
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Who Are We?
Eric Coulter/OFC-Hale. Rated E. Chapter 17 posted.
Story Summary: Hale Southerlyn is Dauntless born and knows where she wants to be, but everything is complicated when her mom is a leader, she has a past she must keep secret and Eric is always looking over her shoulder.
Chapter Summary: Jeanine’s plan is executed, sort of.
*Gif is not mine. All credit goes to the creator.*
reblogging for the second time because I still laugh uncontrollably. in my mind the cows are trying to be gracious about their strange gift. ‘yes we love it thank u’
“for those who don’t know elevated access is a group of pilots that are volunteering their time, skill, aircraft, and resources to provide transportation for reproductive healthcare and gender confirming care.”
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Who Are We?
Eric Coulter/OFC-Hale. Rated E. Chapter 17 posted.
Story Summary: Hale Southerlyn is Dauntless born and knows where she wants to be, but everything is complicated when her mom is a leader, she has a past she must keep secret and Eric is always looking over her shoulder.
Chapter Summary: Jeanine’s plan is executed, sort of.
*Gif is not mine. All credit goes to the creator.*
Let it continue!!! Here’s my addiction
If the text is to small:
Happy birthday!!!
………..
I’ll see you later today?
If you want….
I have something Important to ask you,,,, >.> <.< ^_^;; ^///////^
This fucking comic had been added to over the course of six years. That’s insane, it’s beautiful. It’s inspiring, all these people from different places at different times some have moved on other still here it’s wild.
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